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View Poll Results: Which of the following will happen today? | |||
A camera shot will inadvertently capture Von Miller on the sideline stuffing cocaine baggies up the rectal cavity of a drug mule. | 5 | 50.00% | |
A helmet that fit Manning in the first quarter will no longer fit in the fourth quarter. | 6 | 60.00% | |
A knife will fall out of Von Miller’s sock. | 7 | 70.00% | |
A rival drug cartel will get into a gunfight with De mar ee ee ous Thomas’ mother in the stands. | 5 | 50.00% | |
Aqib Talib’s mother will rob a concessions guy at gunpoint. | 6 | 60.00% | |
At some point Manning will be benched “to change things up”. | 2 | 20.00% | |
Bob Costas will have a long monologue about Manning's greatness. | 6 | 60.00% | |
By virtue of numerous strange calls, Manning will be given an opportunity for a game-winning drive to seal his legacy. | 6 | 60.00% | |
Cam Newton will run onto the field in a Broncos uniform, having signed this morning to a league-minimum deal with the Broncos. | 1 | 10.00% | |
Despite a final score favoring the Panthers by 40, the NFL will announce “co-champions, in honor of Manning storied career". | 5 | 50.00% | |
Elway will be seen wildly celebrating the Broncos’ first touchdown to cut the Panthers’ lead to 41-7 | 6 | 60.00% | |
John Elway will be seen beating a third-world sex worker after a Manning interception. | 6 | 60.00% | |
John Elway will refuse to be the GM of the losing team and will demand a trade to the winning team. | 3 | 30.00% | |
Malik Jackson will dive into a pile late, leading with his forearm. | 5 | 50.00% | |
- The play above will be flagged. | 1 | 10.00% | |
Manning will appear in at least 10 commercials. | 6 | 60.00% | |
Neil Smith will be brought in to translate Aqib Talib’s postgame interview into English. | 4 | 40.00% | |
On a false start or offsides, every player will stop except Von Miller, who will blindside a relaxed Cam Newton. | 7 | 70.00% | |
- The play above will be flagged. | 2 | 20.00% | |
The game will stop temporarily because some Broncos players are coated in an illegal substance | 5 | 50.00% | |
- The play above will be flagged. | 1 | 10.00% | |
The league will force the Panthers to go with an 11-man roster to “maintain parity” | 2 | 20.00% | |
The NFL will have a halftime tribute to the five people murdered in Fero’s restaurant by Von Miller’s friends | 4 | 40.00% | |
The NFL will have more closeup shots of Manning’s face than coverage of the game. | 6 | 60.00% | |
The Panthers will be penalized more than the Broncos by at least 50 yards. | 5 | 50.00% | |
The Panthers will inexplicably play deep zones all game, allowing Manning to complete enough short passes to win. | 3 | 30.00% | |
There will be at least one penalty that nullifies a Panthers interception. | 7 | 70.00% | |
There will be at least three penalties that extend Denver drives on failed third downs. | 8 | 80.00% | |
TJ Ward will spear a Panthers offensive player. | 5 | 50.00% | |
- The play above will be flagged. | 1 | 10.00% | |
Von Miller will be arrested on outstanding warrants during the game. | 4 | 40.00% | |
With the game out of reach, Elway will order the Broncos to yield TDs so he won’t have the worst QB losses in Super Bowl history | 2 | 20.00% | |
None of the above. The NFL is clean and will treat both teams equally. | 1 | 10.00% | |
None of the above. The NFL is clean and will treat both teams equally and the Easter Bunny is real. | 1 | 10.00% | |
None of the above. The league needs to create a new marketing theme with Manning gone, and it'll be Newton. Panthers win. | 0 | 0% | |
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 10. You may not vote on this poll |
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02-07-2016, 05:17 PM | Topic Starter |
NFL's #1 Ermines Fan
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Which of the following things will happen at the Super Bowl today?
Poll forthcoming, after 10 hours of pre-poll hype.
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02-07-2016, 05:18 PM | #2 |
Spiraling down the Drain
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N B4
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02-07-2016, 05:20 PM | #3 |
21st Century Schizoid Fan
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I'm guessing there are about 50 choices
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02-07-2016, 05:23 PM | #4 |
Life is changing..
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Von Miller commits a murder. (Li'l Smokey checks box)
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02-07-2016, 05:27 PM | #5 |
NFL's #1 Ermines Fan
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We live in a complex world.
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I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit. |
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02-07-2016, 05:23 PM | #6 |
Wasted away again...
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I hope that one of the items is "Peyton Manning eats a plate full of human excrement".
I'd vote for that.
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02-07-2016, 05:36 PM | #7 |
Fish are scared of me
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Would absolutely LOVE another 0.00 performance by the ginormous forehead.
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02-07-2016, 05:38 PM | #8 |
Mostly Ignored
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All
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