Other Sports Gladiator 2018 - Round 1, Match 9 - Hydrae versus Willie Lanier

**Rain Man** · 06-29-2018, 09:56 AM

Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is.

Venue - The local mall, extremely crowded with shoppers
Starting Distance - 800 feet

Hydrae

Main Weapon - Extremely corrosive industrial-strength acid in a normal squirting water bottle made entirely of one of the few substances that can contain it.
Backup Weapon - None

Prep Time - 2 Minutes
Special Factors - An axe-wielding psychopath, who ignores pain and doesn't care if he lives, jumps between you and your opponent when the match begins, wanting to kill one of you. He goes after whoever looks the strongest to him.

Willie Lanier

Main Weapon - English longbow and 6 arrows
Backup Weapon - Bowie knife

Prep Time - 11 Minutes
Special Factors - Your non-dominant leg and arm fell asleep and are tingling and hard to move for the first three minutes

**Rain Man** · 06-29-2018, 09:57 AM

This one is going to take some analysis.

threebag · 06-29-2018, 10:06 AM

Willie Lanier wins

**Rain Man** · 06-29-2018, 10:15 AM

So the kicker here is the special factors. The combatants are 800 feet apart, but a psychopath shows up in the middle at 400 feet and makes a beeline toward Willie Lanier. Willie can't use his bow effectively because his arm is asleep, and he's slow because it really hurts to run when your leg is asleep. The psychopath has better weaponry if Willie can't use his longbow, so can Willie evade him for three minutes in a mall? Willie has probably a 30 second head start assuming the psychopath runs at a normal speed.

I don't think Willie can fight off the psychopath in that first three minutes. I think Hydrae wins without firing a squirt shot.

Shag · 06-29-2018, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

So the kicker here is the special factors. The combatants are 800 feet apart, but a psychopath shows up in the middle at 400 feet and makes a beeline toward Willie Lanier. Willie can't use his bow effectively because his arm is asleep, and he's slow because it really hurts to run when your leg is asleep. The psychopath has better weaponry if Willie can't use his longbow, so can Willie evade him for three minutes in a mall? Willie has probably a 30 second head start assuming the psychopath runs at a normal speed.

I don't think Willie can fight off the psychopath in that first three minutes. I think Hydrae wins without firing a squirt shot.

How are you defining "looks stronger"? As soon as Willie tries to move, he's going to limp and possibly fall over on his tingly leg, likely causing the psycho to view Hydrae as stronger.

**Rain Man** · 06-29-2018, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shag

How are you defining "looks stronger"? As soon as Willie tries to move, he's going to limp and possibly fall over on his tingly leg, likely causing the psycho to view Hydrae as stronger.

Maybe it would be like a World Cup soccer match where both contestants flop down immediately and writhe in pain at phantom attacks, in which case the psycho still goes after the guy with the longbow.

Hydrae · 06-29-2018, 10:32 AM

The key here is who the psychopath sees as stronger. I am 6 feet tall, 185 pounds of soft office worker (57 years old) with a weapon that does not look dangerous. Willie on the other hand has that obvious bow so that could lead the psycho to head that way first.

This comes down to who the psycho attacks first. Without the psycho it is a different question and comes down to how well I can use the crowd to come up on Willie to negate the advantage of the bow. Up close I think the acid will be enough of a distraction that he will be pretty ineffective even with the knife.

**RockChalk** · 06-29-2018, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hydrae

The key here is who the psychopath sees as stronger. I am 6 feet tall, 185 pounds of soft office worker (57 years old) with a weapon that does not look dangerous. Willie on the other hand has that obvious bow so that could lead the psycho to head that way first.

Soft office worker

Kman34 · 06-29-2018, 10:48 AM

Willie is going to get chopped up by a psycho... Hydrae will walk up and give Willie a couple of squirts and that will be it...

**Dartgod** · 06-29-2018, 10:50 AM

An interesting set of circumstances in this one to be sure.

It may be the first time in CP history that a member does not claim to be built like Hulk Hogan.

**Renegade** · 06-29-2018, 10:53 AM

You think Willie has no experience with Psycho's wanting to attack him? You don't get into the HOF by letting the Psycho's win. Bowie knife is used in hand to hand combat, Willie shanks him, then when full use of appendages is regained, can use the longbow for the win.

**Rain Man** · 06-29-2018, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Renegade

You think Willie has no experience with Psycho's wanting to attack him? You don't get into the HOF by letting the Psycho's win. Bowie knife is used in hand to hand combat, Willie shanks him, then when full use of appendages is regained, can use the longbow for the win.

And just to confirm, the psycho is not Sherrill Headrick.

Willie Lanier · 06-29-2018, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

And just to confirm, the psycho is not Sherrill Headrick.

Willie Lanier · 06-29-2018, 03:15 PM

In all honesty I know the crazy axe guy is coming for me, and I'm somewhat incapacitated, but I still have full function of half of my body, so I kneel down, take axe guy out, and end Hydrae with the bowie knife as he attempts to approach me with the acid bottle...

**kysirsoze** · 06-29-2018, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willie Lanier

In all honesty I know the crazy axe guy is coming for me, and I'm somewhat incapacitated, but I still have full function of half of my body, so I kneel down, take axe guy out, and end Hydrae with the bowie knife as he attempts to approach me with the acid bottle...

via GIPHY

View Poll Results: Who wins?
Hydrae	31	59.62%
Willie Lanier	21	40.38%
Voters: 52. You may not vote on this poll

06-29-2018, 09:56 AM	Topic Starter
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-562449 VARSITY	Gladiator 2018 - Round 1, Match 9 - Hydrae versus Willie Lanier Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is. Venue - The local mall, extremely crowded with shoppers Starting Distance - 800 feet Hydrae Main Weapon - Extremely corrosive industrial-strength acid in a normal squirting water bottle made entirely of one of the few substances that can contain it. Backup Weapon - None Prep Time - 2 Minutes Special Factors - An axe-wielding psychopath, who ignores pain and doesn't care if he lives, jumps between you and your opponent when the match begins, wanting to kill one of you. He goes after whoever looks the strongest to him. Willie Lanier Main Weapon - English longbow and 6 arrows Backup Weapon - Bowie knife Prep Time - 11 Minutes Special Factors - Your non-dominant leg and arm fell asleep and are tingling and hard to move for the first three minutes
Posts: 145,357

06-29-2018, 09:57 AM	#2
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-562449 VARSITY	This one is going to take some analysis. __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,357	1 0

06-29-2018, 10:06 AM	#3
threebag Snacks Are Under My Apron Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Edge Casino cash: $-992380	Willie Lanier wins __________________ Smells like Up Dog in here. RIP HayWire Greatest Almost Mod Ever
Posts: 26,209

06-29-2018, 10:15 AM	#4
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-562449 VARSITY	So the kicker here is the special factors. The combatants are 800 feet apart, but a psychopath shows up in the middle at 400 feet and makes a beeline toward Willie Lanier. Willie can't use his bow effectively because his arm is asleep, and he's slow because it really hurts to run when your leg is asleep. The psychopath has better weaponry if Willie can't use his longbow, so can Willie evade him for three minutes in a mall? Willie has probably a 30 second head start assuming the psychopath runs at a normal speed. I don't think Willie can fight off the psychopath in that first three minutes. I think Hydrae wins without firing a squirt shot. __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,357	1 0

06-29-2018, 10:32 AM	#7
Hydrae MVP Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Newport, Or Casino cash: $-1073000	The key here is who the psychopath sees as stronger. I am 6 feet tall, 185 pounds of soft office worker (57 years old) with a weapon that does not look dangerous. Willie on the other hand has that obvious bow so that could lead the psycho to head that way first. This comes down to who the psycho attacks first. Without the psycho it is a different question and comes down to how well I can use the crowd to come up on Willie to negate the advantage of the bow. Up close I think the acid will be enough of a distraction that he will be pretty ineffective even with the knife.
Posts: 14,855

06-29-2018, 10:48 AM	#9
Kman34 My Mamma Says Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Glass Cage Of Emotion Casino cash: $-1818214 VARSITY	Willie is going to get chopped up by a psycho... Hydrae will walk up and give Willie a couple of squirts and that will be it...
Posts: 15,133

06-29-2018, 10:50 AM	#10
Dartgod Wasted away again... Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: in Margaritaville Casino cash: $3710000	An interesting set of circumstances in this one to be sure. It may be the first time in CP history that a member does not claim to be built like Hulk Hogan. __________________ If you shed a tear for me, please make it a tear of joy. -Joe Tracy (Nzoner) . .
Posts: 52,192	1 0

06-29-2018, 10:53 AM	#11
Renegade Just Lurking Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Ozark Mountain Country Casino cash: $-1852096	You think Willie has no experience with Psycho's wanting to attack him? You don't get into the HOF by letting the Psycho's win. Bowie knife is used in hand to hand combat, Willie shanks him, then when full use of appendages is regained, can use the longbow for the win.
Posts: 2,121

06-29-2018, 03:15 PM	#14
Willie Lanier Veteran Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Canton Casino cash: $8767261	In all honesty I know the crazy axe guy is coming for me, and I'm somewhat incapacitated, but I still have full function of half of my body, so I kneel down, take axe guy out, and end Hydrae with the bowie knife as he attempts to approach me with the acid bottle...
Posts: 1,983