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Old 04-29-2021, 09:01 AM   Topic Starter
Cheater5 Cheater5 is offline
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I wish Ben Niemann would leave forever
Seriously, I do.


I know what you’re thinking. Maybe I got annoyed by him wearing #56 and soiling the legacy of Derrick Johnson. Maybe after three seasons I would have hoped he'd bulk up a little, and not get pushed around like a bitch by TEs, WRs, RBs and longsnappers. Maybe I’m being unfair (I'm not), or anti Iowa Hawkeye (nope).

The fun of inane threads is not in knowing the reason. It’s in not knowing, and the mystery behind the banality. Rich Scanlon is legendary not because he was here or because he left, but rather because of how badly he sucked. He was a slow, white, unathletic linebacker that miraculously lasted four years in the league, and with that act he became immortal.

It is now Ben Niemann's time to parachute from the plane, and I can assure you that he should not return. It would not be enjoyable for him to become an unsolved Chiefsplanet mystery in the process, because he sucks so badly and we don't care. It’s cruel enough that we have to watch his pasty undersized and slow ass trot out there on crucial third downs, wondering just wtf Spagnuolo sees in him. As long as he is released, no one will speculate about what became of him, nor wonder if the guy with the neck beard and music teacher arms behind the counter at the Lowe's Garden Center was the shittiest LB in Chiefs' history.

So really, there is no mystery. If this thread reaches 1,000 posts before patteu's, then you care more about the fate of a scrubby special teams guy / and suckass situational player than a member who's been here for 20 years.


(Sound of a feminine squeal as a Ben Niemann whiffs yet again on an open field tackle, or is out of position on a slant, or gets washed out filling a gap...)
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Old 04-29-2021, 09:03 AM   #2
The Franchise The Franchise is offline
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His brother is in this draft. Prepare yourself.
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Old 04-29-2021, 09:06 AM   #3
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His brother is in this draft. Prepare thy anus.
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Old 04-29-2021, 09:21 AM   #4
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NICK NIEMAN PICK 58 OF THE NFL DRAFT.
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Old 04-29-2021, 09:29 AM   #5
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My most hated Chief of the past few years.

Honestly, have we cut this piece of shit yet?!?!
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Old 04-29-2021, 10:49 AM   #6
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Bring him in for a look?
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Old 04-29-2021, 10:56 AM   #7
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The hated fascination of this player on this board truly astounds me. Without his sack, we may not have won the Super Bowl. And he wasn't the cause for us losing this last one. Is he an All Pro? Absolutely not. Is he killing us in the cap like others have? Absolutely not. You need to channel your bizarre anger on this player elsewhere.
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Old 04-29-2021, 11:17 AM   #8
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The hated fascination of this player on this board truly astounds me. Without his sack, we may not have won the Super Bowl. And he wasn't the cause for us losing this last one. Is he an All Pro? Absolutely not. Is he killing us in the cap like others have? Absolutely not. You need to channel your bizarre anger on this player elsewhere.
We all just really really hate Iowa players. That’s all.
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Old 04-30-2021, 08:12 AM   #9
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We all just really really hate Iowa players. That’s all.
That's because a good percentage of this board is just dumb and would rather hate based on shit like this instead of be reasonable.
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Old 04-30-2021, 08:29 AM   #10
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That's because a good percentage of this board is just dumb and would rather hate based on shit like this instead of be reasonable.
I r tryin to b rezunable but caveman brane says hate Iowa.
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Old 04-30-2021, 08:32 AM   #11
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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I r tryin to b rezunable but caveman brane says hate Iowa.


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Old 04-30-2021, 12:40 PM   #12
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That's because a good percentage of this board is just dumb and would rather hate based on shit like this instead of be reasonable.
Niemann is a super Jag

Another guy Andy likes so we keep him around forever when we should have upgraded the position 3 years ago.
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Old 04-30-2021, 03:41 PM   #13
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Niemann is a super Jag

Another guy Andy likes so we keep him around forever when we should have upgraded the position 3 years ago.
And that has exactly what to do with him being from Iowa? There's a lot of good players from Iowa. In fact, there's more starting offensive linemen from Iowa in the NFL than any other school.
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Old 04-29-2021, 01:43 PM   #14
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Old 04-29-2021, 01:44 PM   #15
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