I have returned ... [sweeping arm gesture] ... from the sea. - Page 9

**Rain Man** · 04-13-2007, 11:44 PM

I got fed up with stuff a couple of weeks ago and decided to run off to sea. So I hopped a ship and headed off to South America.

I got down to the Netherlands Antilles before I remembered that I don't speak Spanish, so I decided to stay there and be a beach bum. However, I sunburn too easily, so I had to leave. I went east, thinking that perhaps that I could install a communist government in Grenada, but they weren't having any of that, so I went back to St. Kitts to discover a hidden civilization in the rain forest and get rich off of the resulting fame. Alas, St. Kitts is pretty much explored out, so I went to New York for a while so I could have a nice, quiet place to think. I decided there to come back to Denver and run a market research company.

Pictures to follow. And by the way, it was great that you guys missed me. Did anyone even notice that I had completely left the continent?

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SPchief

Pardon me for being not art intleigent, but what does MoMA mean?

Museum of Modern Art?

Yeah. Exactly.

SPchief · 04-14-2007, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

This was actually a pretty darn good deal. You should go for it.

I usually go more for Type A vacations, but at this point in time, something more relaxing sounded good. The wife enjoyed it so much that she's already talking about doing another cruise on this same ship in Europe. I'm pleased, because she's not really much into travel, and I really enjoy it.

My folks have been into cruises recently. From what they say, a cruise in Alaska is good.

**DaFace** · 04-14-2007, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Aw, come on. You know how I hate it when you cry.

It's OK. I figure you might be crying when you find out that I got rid of your two longest-tenured employees while you were gone.

SPchief · 04-14-2007, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

It's OK. I figure you might be crying when you find out that I got rid of your two longest-tenured employees while you were gone.

Don't forget the fire.

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luv

Thanks for sharing the pictures. Always fun to see new places. How are the ankles?

Man, they hurt like heck for a few days. They're still pretty dark red, especially the right one, but at least it got me out of dancing during the onboard ball.

Seriously, I sunburn like an egg on a hot skillet, and I have every risk factor for skin cancer, and have also had it (mild version, fortunately) a few years back. I have to completely slather myself in sunscreen or I'll die if I'm out in a bright sun, hence the foreign legion hat and the orange socks and stuff.

stumppy · 04-14-2007, 01:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

It's OK. I figure you might be crying when you find out that I got rid of your two longest-tenured employees while you were gone.

Along with very generous severance package's.

**DaFace** · 04-14-2007, 01:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SPchief

Don't forget the fire.

Heh...a fire wouldn't matter after everything else that happened.

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SPchief

My folks have been into cruises recently. From what they say, a cruise in Alaska is good.

I think everyone's folks are into cruising. I was probably in the youngest 25 percent of people on the ship. However, the nice part of that is that it probably moved me up to the 50th percentile in terms of attractiveness, since many of the people were walking cadavers.

SPchief · 04-14-2007, 01:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

Heh...a fire wouldn't matter after everything else that happened.

Good point.

**luv** · 04-14-2007, 01:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I think everyone's folks are into cruising. I was probably in the youngest 25 percent of people on the ship. However, the nice part of that is that it probably moved me up to the 50th percentile in terms of attractiveness, since many of the people were walking cadavers.

Most of the young folks spend their parents money on party cruises during spring break.

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:25 AM

Key things I learned on this trip:

1. Always apply sunscreen below the sock line.

2. Women on beaches will do things that they normally wouldn't do in a million years, like look down, notice that their breasts are positioned funny and grab them and reposition them and move them around and pull open their swimsuit top and reach in and reposition them again and then ask their friends and then their friends will grab them and move them around, all within direct viewing distance of a bug-eyed bald middle-aged guy. Or my personal favorite, decide that they can remove their underwear under their skirt and put a bikini bottom on and not show the world their secret hidden civilization when by definition they have to raise their skirt past the top of the bikini bottom to get it on, thereby exposing themselves completely to any nearby bugeyed bald middle-aged men.

3. It bothers old British people if you ask them what they did in World War II.

4. I can't understand Scottish people at all.

5. If American women all went topless at the beach, it would cause enormous interest for about two days and then no one would think about it any more.

6. If you want to be a ship crewman, it really helps to be from the Philippines.

7. The Black Dahlia was a really bad movie.

8. Caribbean islands are a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. But if I had to, it would probably be in Grenada.

9. I look fabulous in a tuxedo.

10. I would live on the Queen Mary 2 if I could afford it. Hey, DaFace! Get to work!

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

It's OK. I figure you might be crying when you find out that I got rid of your two longest-tenured employees while you were gone.

I was wondering why their offices were empty.

**luv** · 04-14-2007, 01:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

9. I look fabulous in a tuxedo.

Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man!

**Rain Man** · 04-14-2007, 01:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luv

Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man!

Truthfully, everyone probably looks good in a tuxedo. But man oh man, I feel like 1.2 millon bucks when I'm wearing one.

**007** · 04-14-2007, 01:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Truthfully, everyone probably looks good in a tuxedo. But man oh man, I feel like 1.2 millon bucks when I'm wearing one.

1.2? That's all?

04-13-2007, 11:44 PM
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-732449 VARSITY	I have returned ... [sweeping arm gesture] ... from the sea. I got fed up with stuff a couple of weeks ago and decided to run off to sea. So I hopped a ship and headed off to South America. I got down to the Netherlands Antilles before I remembered that I don't speak Spanish, so I decided to stay there and be a beach bum. However, I sunburn too easily, so I had to leave. I went east, thinking that perhaps that I could install a communist government in Grenada, but they weren't having any of that, so I went back to St. Kitts to discover a hidden civilization in the rain forest and get rich off of the resulting fame. Alas, St. Kitts is pretty much explored out, so I went to New York for a while so I could have a nice, quiet place to think. I decided there to come back to Denver and run a market research company. Pictures to follow. And by the way, it was great that you guys missed me. Did anyone even notice that I had completely left the continent?
Posts: 145,563

04-14-2007, 01:25 AM	#131
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-732449 VARSITY	Key things I learned on this trip: 1. Always apply sunscreen below the sock line. 2. Women on beaches will do things that they normally wouldn't do in a million years, like look down, notice that their breasts are positioned funny and grab them and reposition them and move them around and pull open their swimsuit top and reach in and reposition them again and then ask their friends and then their friends will grab them and move them around, all within direct viewing distance of a bug-eyed bald middle-aged guy. Or my personal favorite, decide that they can remove their underwear under their skirt and put a bikini bottom on and not show the world their secret hidden civilization when by definition they have to raise their skirt past the top of the bikini bottom to get it on, thereby exposing themselves completely to any nearby bugeyed bald middle-aged men. 3. It bothers old British people if you ask them what they did in World War II. 4. I can't understand Scottish people at all. 5. If American women all went topless at the beach, it would cause enormous interest for about two days and then no one would think about it any more. 6. If you want to be a ship crewman, it really helps to be from the Philippines. 7. The Black Dahlia was a really bad movie. 8. Caribbean islands are a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. But if I had to, it would probably be in Grenada. 9. I look fabulous in a tuxedo. 10. I would live on the Queen Mary 2 if I could afford it. Hey, DaFace! Get to work! __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,563