The Hard Way

[Iowanian]

Like many of you, for some unknown reason, I've had to learn many, many lessons the hard way.

Someone tells you not to do something, but you just have to anyway.....

Share those stories and the lesson learned.

[RJ]

For future reference, assuming another carton of eggs ever makes it's way into the Iowanian residence.....


http://www.recipesource.com/main-dis...1/rec0137.html


The Perfect Hard Boiled Egg

Recipe By : Julia Child, “The Way to Cook”
Serving Size : 1 Preparation Time :0:40
Categories : Cheese/Eggs Family Recipes

Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
For 1-4 Eggs:
1 to 4 Eggs
2 quarts water -- * see note
For 12 Eggs:
12 Eggs
3 1/2 quarts water -- * see note
For 24 Eggs:
24 Eggs
6 quarts water -- * see note
Special Equipment_________________________
High (not wide) Saucepan with cover
Bowl w/ice cubes & water (large enough to
completely cover eggs)

*note: water should cover the eggs by 1 inch, so use a tall pan, and limit
cooking to 2 dozen eggs at a time.

1. Lay the eggs in the pan and add the amount of cold water specified. Set
over high heat and bring just to the boil; remove from heat, cover the pan,
and let sit exactly 17 minutes.

2. When the time is up, transfer the eggs to the bowl of ice cubes and
water. Chill for 2 minutes while bringing the cooking water to the boil
again. (This 2 minute chilling shrinks the body of the egg from the shell.)

3. Transfer the eggs (6 at a time only) to the boiling water, bring to the
boil again, and let boil for 10 seconds - this expands the shell from the
egg. Remove eggs, and place back into the ice water.


Chilling the eggs promptly after each step prevents that dark line from
forming, and if time allows, leave the eggs in the ice water after the last
step for 15 to 20 minutes. Chilled eggs are easier to peel, as well.

The peeled eggs will keep perfectly in the refrigerator, submerged in water
in an uncovered container, for 2 to 3 days.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

NOTES : The perfect hard boiled egg has a tender white, and a yolk properly
set. There is not the faintest darkening of yolk where the white encircles
it (a chemical reaction caused by too much heat in the cooking process).
Eggs cooked this way can also be peeled neatly.

The system described here, developed by the Georgia Egg Board, takes a bit
of fussing - but it really does produce an absolutely Perfect Hard Boiled Egg!

[kstater]

Say you ate the eggs, and the smell is what the eggs do to you.

[blueballs]

sounds like you waited too long
to nuke some eggs

[Iowanian]

I'm thinking this one is going to rank right up there, but still behind the first time I went to ride a bull, and as I strutted out of the house, my dad saying "don't bust your ass"...

[Iowanian]

I know there are some good, hard-earned lessons in the day crew.

Somewhere, one of you is dying to post your "don't use superglue for lube" story.

[Fire Me Boy!]

If you ever engage in an argument with your wife that you've had numerous times before, never... ever... say, "Oh, are we gonna argue over this shit again? 'Cause I'm gonna need a ****ing chair."

[Fire Me Boy!]

Also, don't argue over piracy on an internet bulletin board.

[Gonzo]

Well, you're still amongst the living. How did the missus take it? It could'nt have been too bad.

[MagicHef]

If you're driving in an unfamiliar area in the middle of a huge downpour, don't assume that the intersection in front of you is flat with a few inches of water on it. It is possible for the intersection to be a few feet lower than the road you are on, and simply filled with water.

[patteeu]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

Stay of execution.

The good news is, the fussing/teething young one, and the splashing drowned out the sound of the blast. I've scrubbed the egg guts off of everything, run ice and bleech through the disposal afterwards...

The bad news.....a few squirts of fabreeze airspray doesn't remove the stench of the death of the Dumpty family.

I knew I was screwed with 3yroldowanian came hopping into the kitchen as I put the finishing touches on and said "something stinks, clear upstairs".

She's giving a bottle to youngestowanian.....and I'll read to oldestchildowanian soon and wait for my beating.

Maybe I'll run and go to my brothers....

What do the ice and bleach do? Is that a way to prevent your drain pipes from getting clogged or something? Do you use straight bleach?

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by The Great Gonzo

Well, you're still amongst the living. How did the missus take it? It could'nt have been too bad.

I only have two fingers on my right hand, I'm missing my left ear and foot, and I'm down to one testicle.

How bad do you think it was?

[Trench]

Holy crap! That's even better than (also something not to say to wife/girlfriend) "did you want to talk about something or did you just call to bitch at me?"

Originally Posted by Fire Me Boy!

If you ever engage in an argument with your wife that you've had numerous times before, never... ever... say, "Oh, are we gonna argue over this shit again? 'Cause I'm gonna need a ****ing chair."

[hawkchief]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

For example.

5 minutes from now, Brideowanian will be coming downstairs. She'll be soaked from the bath of our 2 girls, which isn't going well and wasn't pleased when they went up.

Before going up, I decided that as part of my healthier diet attempt, I was going to boil some eggs for supper(she didn't like that because, well, eggs do things to me). I chose the mircowave, a cereal bowl, 2/3 full of water and 4 eggs.

She told me not to do it(even though I've done it before successfully) told me they would explode and even pulled it up on google to warn me.

Not me....I'm an effing cave man in my own cave and I KNOW HOW TO USE FIRE!!!!

Anyway, about 5 minutes into a 7 minute cook.....from the chair in front of the game BLAMO!!!!!!

Door blown open....stuff knocked off of top of microwave, a lady-doo-dad from the wall broken on the floor and the kitchen looks like Humpty Dumpty's family reunion was just hit with a suicide bomber.

Iowanian is going to be in for it soon.....


and now I know.....Just boil eggs on the stove.


oh boy....foot steps.

I guess asking her for a BJ right now is out of the question?

[Demonpenz]

I had a lady friend, she had a kid, she didn't take real good care of the kid, so everyone told me that she was bad news and move on. Well I am bored, alone, and don't have many lady friends who aren't toothless or 300 pounds so I stuck with her. Obvouisly it didn't work out :shakefist:

[Stinger]

After an argument in the morning and attending a funeral that afternoon and reminiscing about the service don't mention that the correct song to be played at the wife's funeral is Ding - Dong - The - Witch - Is - Dead.