Poop Frazod's Epic Grill Disaster - Page 3

Frazod · 08-01-2010, 08:36 PM

I'll probably regret posting this, but what the hell. I'm sure you guys can use a good laugh for the next few years. This one may surpass the refrigerator, since the appliance in question did not survive.

Yesterday, as I spent about an hour cleaning my grill, I thought that it might be nice to get a new one at some point. The grill is nine years old, a bit worse for wear, small and lacking any extras. I use it pretty much daily during the summer. So today, I planned to grill chicken for lunch. I store my grilling tools inside the grill when not in use, and remove them when I'm cooking. Well, this day, I removed all but one.

It was sunny, so I had my sunglasses on. The inside of the grill is black, and so was the handle of the plastic grill brush/scraper that I neglected to remove from the back of the top rack. I should have known it was there, but I didn't see it. So I lit the burners and went back inside.

I come out a few minutes later with the food, open the lid and am greeted by a flaming mass of burning, melting plastic. Turning off the burners does not stop it. Flaming goo is starting to drip through the holes at the bottom onto the mat. The wife is freaking out, and I run for the fire extinguisher, which I'd never used before. The second lesson I learned today is if you're aiming a chemical extinguisher into an enclosed space, you might want to stand back a bit. Soon the grill, the deck and myself were enveloped in a cloud of white flame reerunant which I can still taste a bit as I type this. But the fire's out. The grill was, needless to say, a loss - I doubt if I could have ever effectively cleaned all that melted burned plastic out of it and had no desire to eat toxic fumes with my food.

****.

So the old grill is on the curb waiting for the garbage man, and after a trip to Home Depot and a couple of annoying hours of assembly I now have the brand new, large grill with a thermostat and a side burner that I pondered buying yesterday (grills tend to be on sale this time of year, too!). I already broke it in too - it rocks! I also have a new scraper with a WOODEN handle.

So I guess all's well that ends well. I'll file this under MISTAKES YOU ONLY MAKE ONCE, and feel relieved that I didn't burn my ****ing building down. And I assume my wife will quit busting my balls at some point in the next decade or so.

So how was your Sunday?

**notorious** · 08-01-2010, 09:49 PM

Last week I had interesting experience. The house I was working on had an old floor furnace hole that had been converted to a return air vent.

It looked like it was solid until one missed step taught me otherwise. It was strange when at one moment I am removing a door and the next moment I am staring at dirty laundry in the basement.

LOL, I must have the falling instincts of a pro wrestler. It hurt, but no injuries to report.

**CrazyPhuD** · 08-01-2010, 09:55 PM

Heh back in college I came back for winter break, I was tired and not really thinking straight. I went to go light our wood fireplace(with a gas starter). I literally asked myself the question...no wait do I strike the match then turn on the gas, or turn on the gas then light the match(that's how out of it I was). I finally come to the conclusion that the right answer is turn on the gas then light the match. Afterall it'll be quick to light the match so no big deal.....

Turns on the gas...

strike one....match doesn't light....

strike two....match still doesn't light....

strike three....match lights...whooo hooo!!!!

Brings match near fireplace....

Woooosssshhh....big ass ball of fire comes out of said fireplace....

Fortinately all it did was singe my hair a bit....

But I'll never turn on the gas before lighting the match again.....

Over-Head · 08-01-2010, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frazod

I'll probably regret posting this

No ****en doubt!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by frazod

And I assume my wife will quit busting my balls at some point in the next decade or so.

That was a retorical statement right? Women forget nothing!!!

08-01-2010, 10:03 PM

Awesome. I'm sure glad I've never made any mistakes.

Hog's Gone Fishin · 08-01-2010, 10:16 PM

I might jack off hogs for a living but at least I'm not a dumbass!

KCHawg · 08-01-2010, 10:30 PM

'Hamas' Jenkins · 08-01-2010, 11:35 PM

Reminds me of when we used to grill on our glassed in back porch in the shit hole I lived in my sophomore year of college.

The ignitors didn't work on the grill, so we'd light paper towels on fire and throw them by the burners.

One time I got distracted and let the gas on for too long.

A year later, the hair on my arms was almost fully grown back.

rambleonthruthefog · 08-02-2010, 12:09 AM

quit being a selfish, lazy, c*nt and move your f'n grill away from the house before you kill someone!

stevieray · 08-02-2010, 12:14 AM

damn tim...i feel for you, but it is kind of funny..glad it didn't escalate into something worse....kudos to your quick thinking.

pics of the snowstorm would be hilarious though.....

Joe Seahawk · 08-02-2010, 12:21 AM

If you got a gas grill, I hope it was a Weber.

Frazod · 08-02-2010, 06:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe Seahawk

If you got a gas grill, I hope it was a Weber.

Not with an unemployed wife I didn't. I'm sure they're great grills, but you pay as much for the name as the grill iteslf.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevieray

damn tim...i feel for you, but it is kind of funny..glad it didn't escalate into something worse....kudos to your quick thinking.

pics of the snowstorm would be hilarious though.....

We all make mistakes, but it's how we deal with them that makes all the difference. I had the safety equipment I needed and used it quickly and effectively, containing the damage to the grill itself and the mat below (which served it's purpose in protecting the deck). I would have been in trouble if I hadn't had that extinguisher, though. Definitely something no household should be without.

Frazod · 08-02-2010, 06:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rambleonthruthefog

quit being a selfish, lazy, c*nt and move your f'n grill away from the house before you kill someone!

With the new language filters, you can say "****" without having to insert an asterisk. Here, I'll demonstrate - Go **** yourself, you ignorant ****.

See how easy that was?

Chief Henry · 08-02-2010, 06:54 AM

Rep - just becaue you and all of us can laugh at your expense. Nice story.it warms my heart to know other males can do some dam stupid shit too...

Fritz88 · 08-02-2010, 07:24 AM

Frazod · 08-02-2010, 07:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Groves

So while you're fresh off the new grill boat, what's the latest in grills these days? Any features falling into the "must have" category or are the spendy ones just like the cheap ones with more flair?

Didn't notice this before.

I guess I'd describe my new grill as a "top end cheapie." It was on sale for $130 at Home Depot. The regular price was in the $200-$300 range. It has a side burner, which I'll probably never use, and a thermostat, which is a feature I'd been wanting as I try to experiment with cooking new things. The nicest feature is the sectional cooking surface, which is much easier to remove and clean. This grill also doesn't require the lava stones, since it has four separate burners and a large cooking surface, indirect heat is provided by turning up a burner in an unused area. I'll probably go through propane faster, but that's not a big deal.

Another really useful thing I picked up recently is a fuel gauge which attaches to the tank. I nearly ran out of gas while cooking earlier in the year - I won't have to worry about that happening again.

08-01-2010, 08:36 PM
Frazod Did you hear what I said? Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $-766615	Frazod's Epic Grill Disaster I'll probably regret posting this, but what the hell. I'm sure you guys can use a good laugh for the next few years. This one may surpass the refrigerator, since the appliance in question did not survive. Yesterday, as I spent about an hour cleaning my grill, I thought that it might be nice to get a new one at some point. The grill is nine years old, a bit worse for wear, small and lacking any extras. I use it pretty much daily during the summer. So today, I planned to grill chicken for lunch. I store my grilling tools inside the grill when not in use, and remove them when I'm cooking. Well, this day, I removed all but one. It was sunny, so I had my sunglasses on. The inside of the grill is black, and so was the handle of the plastic grill brush/scraper that I neglected to remove from the back of the top rack. I should have known it was there, but I didn't see it. So I lit the burners and went back inside. I come out a few minutes later with the food, open the lid and am greeted by a flaming mass of burning, melting plastic. Turning off the burners does not stop it. Flaming goo is starting to drip through the holes at the bottom onto the mat. The wife is freaking out, and I run for the fire extinguisher, which I'd never used before. The second lesson I learned today is if you're aiming a chemical extinguisher into an enclosed space, you might want to stand back a bit. Soon the grill, the deck and myself were enveloped in a cloud of white flame reerunant which I can still taste a bit as I type this. But the fire's out. The grill was, needless to say, a loss - I doubt if I could have ever effectively cleaned all that melted burned plastic out of it and had no desire to eat toxic fumes with my food. **. So the old grill is on the curb waiting for the garbage man, and after a trip to Home Depot and a couple of annoying hours of assembly I now have the brand new, large grill with a thermostat and a side burner that I pondered buying yesterday (grills tend to be on sale this time of year, too!). I already broke it in too - it rocks! I also have a new scraper with a WOODEN handle. So I guess all's well that ends well. I'll file this under MISTAKES YOU ONLY MAKE ONCE, and feel relieved that I didn't burn my **ing building down. And I assume my wife will quit busting my balls at some point in the next decade or so. So how was your Sunday?
Posts: 121,770

08-01-2010, 09:49 PM	#31
notorious Supporter Join Date: May 2005 Location: Who knows? Casino cash: $-954116	Last week I had interesting experience. The house I was working on had an old floor furnace hole that had been converted to a return air vent. It looked like it was solid until one missed step taught me otherwise. It was strange when at one moment I am removing a door and the next moment I am staring at dirty laundry in the basement. LOL, I must have the falling instincts of a pro wrestler. It hurt, but no injuries to report.
Posts: 88,587

08-01-2010, 09:55 PM	#32
CrazyPhuD Meow Join Date: Jun 2005 Casino cash: $10005050	Heh back in college I came back for winter break, I was tired and not really thinking straight. I went to go light our wood fireplace(with a gas starter). I literally asked myself the question...no wait do I strike the match then turn on the gas, or turn on the gas then light the match(that's how out of it I was). I finally come to the conclusion that the right answer is turn on the gas then light the match. Afterall it'll be quick to light the match so no big deal..... Turns on the gas... strike one....match doesn't light.... strike two....match still doesn't light.... strike three....match lights...whooo hooo!!!! Brings match near fireplace.... Woooosssshhh....big ass ball of fire comes out of said fireplace.... Fortinately all it did was singe my hair a bit.... But I'll never turn on the gas before lighting the match again..... __________________ "Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a t*rd by the clean end"
Posts: 8,523

08-01-2010, 10:03 PM	#34
Phobia Guest Casino cash: $	Awesome. I'm sure glad I've never made any mistakes.
Posts: n/a

08-01-2010, 10:16 PM	#35
Hog's Gone Fishin Fish are scared of me Join Date: Nov 2001 Casino cash: $-1529523	I might jack off hogs for a living but at least I'm not a dumbass!
Posts: 40,649

08-01-2010, 10:30 PM	#36
KCHawg Combat Hawgkeeper 79-121 Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sahuarita, Arizona Casino cash: $9715275	^ __________________ quote Ari Chi3fs -**** OFF CHARGER FANS...except their one fan they had before Tomlinson joined the Chargers. That one fan can stay, he is legacy fan. http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com...ower-rankings/ 32. Denver Broncos (No. 23; 2-5): With four wins and 13 losses over the last 17 games and a 45-point loss at home to the Raiders, we'd put the Broncos lower than No. 32 if we could
Posts: 646

08-01-2010, 11:35 PM	#37
'Hamas' Jenkins Now you've pissed me off! Join Date: Jan 2006 Casino cash: $7149572	Reminds me of when we used to grill on our glassed in back porch in the shit hole I lived in my sophomore year of college. The ignitors didn't work on the grill, so we'd light paper towels on fire and throw them by the burners. One time I got distracted and let the gas on for too long. A year later, the hair on my arms was almost fully grown back. __________________ "When the Know-Nothings get control, it will read 'all men are created equal, except negroes, and foreigners, and Catholics.' When it comes to this I should prefer emigrating to some country where they make no pretense of loving liberty – to Russia, for instance, where despotism can be taken pure, and without the base alloy of hypocrisy.”--Abraham Lincoln
Posts: 75,083

08-02-2010, 12:09 AM	#38
rambleonthruthefog Veteran Join Date: May 2008 Location: Austin, Texas Casino cash: $2935026	quit being a selfish, lazy, c*nt and move your f'n grill away from the house before you kill someone!
Posts: 1,403

08-02-2010, 12:14 AM	#39
stevieray Most things I worry about… Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Under Pressure Casino cash: $-1304727	damn tim...i feel for you, but it is kind of funny..glad it didn't escalate into something worse....kudos to your quick thinking. pics of the snowstorm would be hilarious though.....
Posts: 74,120

08-02-2010, 12:21 AM	#40
Joe Seahawk This place entertains.. Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Seattle Casino cash: $5484435	If you got a gas grill, I hope it was a Weber.
Posts: 5,514

08-02-2010, 06:54 AM	#43
Chief Henry MVP Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: IOWA Casino cash: $10005088	Rep - just becaue you and all of us can laugh at your expense. Nice story.it warms my heart to know other males can do some dam stupid shit too... __________________ Patrick Mahomes...The only QB to ever play in the NFL with at least 5,000 passing yards in a single season and 5,000 passing yards in a single college season.
Posts: 8,361

08-02-2010, 07:24 AM	#44
Fritz88 Custom User Title Join Date: Nov 2008 Casino cash: $8505943
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