My day - a snippet of life.

[Rain Man]

I got up and put some laundry in because today is laundry day, and then I went to the dry cleaner to drop some shirts off. It's always awkward to go to the dry cleaner because I've been going there for 18 years and I never asked the guy's name, and after the first few years it seemed inappropriate to ask.

Then I went for a run. In Mile 1 I found a smart phone, which oddly is the second smart phone I've found this week. I ran 11 miles, which meant that I had to carry the phone for ten miles. I had my sunglasses on, and they're really dark glasses with a sporty frame. Age is all about the eyes, and when you can't see my eyes I look younger. I know this because women runners smile and say hi when I'm running in my sunglasses, and they ignore me when I'm wearing my regular glasses. Women like a young guy, apparently.

I thought the phone was locked and didn't bother checking until I finished my run. I swiped it and it opened, which was good. There was a text from somebody offering a $25 reward for returning it. I pondered looking for naked pictures on it, but it was a guy's phone so I didn't. I dropped it off when I went out for lunch, and got a phone message where the guy said thank you twelve times in sixty seconds. He said he owes me a favor so I'm going to see if he'll kill someone for me. That would be really cool.

My wife took me to lunch and she decided that we're going to start trying new places. She took me to a place that had rusty light fixtures and odd tables, but that's part of the upscale trendiness. I only saw one thing on the menu that I liked, and it turned out that I didn't like it so I only ate half. I got a kale salad on the side and it was good, but the water glasses were only about six ounces and I'd just run 11 miles, so that was no good. You had to refill your water glass yourself, so it was up and down, up and down. I didn't get any of the good-looking desserts and when we left I told my wife that I was never going back unless it was just for dessert. She seemed disappointed that I didn't like it.

We decided to go to a movie, so we ran downtown and saw the one where Michael Oher's mom goes into outer space and gets blindsided. It was in 3-D, which I don't really get. I usually don't notice the 3-D part, and I'm always worried that the 3-D lenses will scratch the lenses on my regular glasses. Interestingly, if I watch a 2-D movie without my regular glasses, it looks just like a 3-D movie with my regular glasses and without the 3-D glasses. I like the continuity of that.

It was a massive movie theater, and the movie with Michael Oher's mom was in the second-to-last theater, which meant going in, going left, going upstairs, going left again, turning right, walking down a long aisle, turning left again, and then one final right turn. As the previews were ending we realized that everyone else was putting on their 3-D glasses and we had none. The woman in the row ahead of us said that the ticket taker was supposed to give them to us, and he was at the main entrance. I had to run out, turn left, turn right, run down the aisle, turn left, turn right, go downstairs, go right, get our glasses, and then do it all in reverse. I got there right as the movie started, and hoped that no one would throw popcorn at me because I was breathing too loud. It's not worth dying for 3-D.

We watched the movie and it was really good. I had junior mints and an enormous Pibb Extra. I felt bad about all the oxygen I was using when Michael Oher's mom really needed it. The movie made me not want to be an astronaut, and then want to be an astronaut. But I wear both regular glasses and 3-D glasses, and I don't think you can wear those if you want to be an astronaut.

We drove home and on the way I pretended my car was a spacecraft. I docked successfully with the garage. Pretty good day all in all.