Does passing impacted stool hurt as bad as they say?

[Scorp]

Stick a garden hose up your anus as far as you can. When you get it up as far as you can turn it on. Don't turn it on much, just get a little trickle, then walk around your yard and fertilize like a mother. Do this every day and you will be clean as a whistle up there, and your yard will look great.