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Old 05-20-2009, 09:30 AM  
DiaperBoy27 DiaperBoy27 is offline
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My Girlfriend got her period!!!
We were a little worried. But no baby, no baby, no baby!

I'm going to celebrate.
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Old 05-20-2009, 01:25 PM   #211
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Old 05-20-2009, 01:31 PM   #212
Saccopoo Saccopoo is offline
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Originally Posted by Jilly View Post
Maybe you shouldn't show her your box of sex toys on the first date?
That used to be my third date ice breaker. First dates usually just end in with a foot massage and a little light petting. Maybe some oral sex. I'm all for taking my time these days.
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Old 05-20-2009, 01:32 PM   #213
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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if she can take 9 inches, then ok....as long as she's under the understanding that I will not reciprocate
She'd laugh at your nine inches and ask where the rest was. It's a little known fact that "katipan" is apache for "grand canyon".
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:19 PM   #214
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Originally Posted by keg in kc View Post
She'd laugh at your nine inches and ask where the rest was. It's a little known fact that "katipan" is apache for "grand canyon".
Nine inches would come out my belly button.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:28 PM   #215
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Nine inches would come out my belly button.
How about 4.5 inches dipped in twice? I think I can manage that if I try to stretch it out for a few weeks.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:28 PM   #216
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Don't worry, I'm sure Roman will issue you another one of your cousins to marry when they turn 13. You may also be one of those people who would suck on a muddy h'roid.

You were getting a raw deal though, if you were taking 9" of plastic only to issue 3" of skin.


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You illiterate redneck.
However, I also have many of these previously mentioned marital aids in addition to many, many others. When I used to have sex, I just wanted to make sure that my partner was completely and utterly satisfied and just wanted to cover all the bases. One would have to be naive, a neophyte or ill-trained in the sexual arts not have tools of the trade on hand to help ensure a pleasurable experience for all parties involved.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:34 PM   #217
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Since my dad has had prostate cancer, I get the "check" earlier than most men. 35ish or so which is coming up REALLLLLLY ****ing fast.

Anyone who says it isn't every bit as bad as you'd ever imagine is either a liar or gay.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:35 PM   #218
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Originally Posted by keg in kc View Post
How about 4.5 inches dipped in twice? I think I can manage that if I try to stretch it out for a few weeks.
Awwwww! You're going to bring a friend?
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:37 PM   #219
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Awwwww! You're going to bring a friend?
I don't think I've ever called him a friend, but I never go anywhere without him.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:39 PM   #220
Mr. Plow Mr. Plow is offline
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Awwwww! You're going to bring a friend?
Actually, he's bringing me and I'm bringing a couple friends....got to get you the full 4.5 inches.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:40 PM   #221
Jilly Jilly is offline
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I'm coming too, but I don't need any friends. Figure that one out.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:42 PM   #222
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I'm coming too, but I don't need any friends. Figure that one out.
You're lucky. I'm only breathing hard.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:43 PM   #223
Katipan Katipan is offline
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I'm coming too, but I don't need any friends. Figure that one out.


yes. yes you are.
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:45 PM   #224
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:50 PM   #225
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Performance anxiety?

Smoke this.
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