GF of 3 years left me yesterday....

[dirk digler]

Originally Posted by Pushead2

not away a lot with hockey...She doesn't hang out on week nights anymore because she's either grading papers or she is writing papers to be published.
In the first two years she use to travel with me because she loves seeing new cities. Once the PhD came into play it was a done deal,

I spoke to her today to air some things out, it was a good productive talk. She never lied or hid anything from me & vice versa. She told me "I wish it was another man, it would be easier for both of us....." She feels that we were both too different of people & feels guilty for making me try to be someone I wasn't.

Sorry to hear that but what happened is a lot better than being cheated on.

Originally Posted by Pushead2

I'm afraid it's over & damage is done....

What damage did you do?

Originally Posted by dirk digler

Sorry to hear that but what happened is a lot better than being cheated on.

Yeah. No doubt. Infidelity leaves the jilted party with trust issues and unresolved anger - years later. But, I don't really know too much about that.

[JD10367]

Originally Posted by Phobia

Yeah. No doubt. Infidelity leaves the jilted party with trust issues and unresolved anger - years later. But, I don't really know too much about that.

Dude, you just crushed your mouse with your right hand.

[dirk digler]

Originally Posted by Phobia

Yeah. No doubt. Infidelity leaves the jilted party with trust issues and unresolved anger - years later. But, I don't really know too much about that.

No kidding. It also destroys families and I feel my daughter is paying a huge price for it.

[Over-Head]

Originally Posted by Phobia

Yeah. No doubt. Infidelity leaves the jilted party with trust issues and unresolved anger - years later. But, I don't really know too much about that.

I do, the ex still hates me

[Pushead2]

Originally Posted by Comanche

You can't hang out with her while she is doing those things?



But you said you aren't away much with hockey, correct?



You didn't explain what she meant by "making me try to be someone I wasn't." How did she try to make you into someone you aren't?

Both comments still seem very cliche'. It still seems that there is missing information here. . .

There was no hanging out, I would watch TV while she grades papers. They are essays since she is going for PhD in English. Wouldn't go out like we used to either on Saturday nights, it's evident now that she was just pushing me aside.

Most of my hockey games are within an hours drive here in NYC & my home games are in Manhattan itself...., when we travel it's maybe once a month for Friday & Sat back for Sun type of ordeal so she was down for it.....

Because we were very different she was trying to make me more into her interests & stuff. No doubt we were different, but opposites attract & that certainly was the case for me. Examples are she liked to try new things in everything as where I'm a bit more skeptical to try. Eating healthy is something she's big on that I do 50% of the time. But I exercise like crazy because of hockey & she's big on exercising. Etc etc.

[beach tribe]

Originally Posted by Pushead2

There was no hanging out, I would watch TV while she grades papers. They are essays since she is going for PhD in English. Wouldn't go out like we used to either on Saturday nights, it's evident now that she was just pushing me aside.

Most of my hockey games are within an hours drive here in NYC & my home games are in Manhattan itself...., when we travel it's maybe once a month for Friday & Sat back for Sun type of ordeal so she was down for it.....

Because we were very different she was trying to make me more into her interests & stuff. No doubt we were different, but opposites attract & that certainly was the case for me. Examples are she liked to try new things in everything as where I'm a bit more skeptical to try. Eating healthy is something she's big on that I do 50% of the time. But I exercise like crazy because of hockey & she's big on exercising. Etc etc.

This honestly sounds like typical man/women things. Men, and women are never going to be interested in exactly the same things. You humor the on most, and stand by what you want on others. the whole Compromise thing.
Some chicks are spoiled, and cannot handle these things.

And I hate to do this again, but she's been talking to someone, and that someone doesn't wear a skirt. I would bet anything on it.
Cut bait, and find a new one. Or try out a few new ones. This one's not going to compromise, she has been compromised. A girl will try to change you till the end of time, unless she thinks she's found someone who is made of more pliable clay. All the things she is saying now, is creating the space she needs to not feel guilty about what she is doing/going to do. I'm really sorry man.

Just be nice, and let her go. Just let her go. It's not your fault. She's not a liar or a bitch, or slut. These things happen to young people. They just do.

[Iowanian]

I knew buffalo hump was a chic.
Hasn't provided anything close to a Manswer yet.

[Iowanian]

Originally Posted by Comanche

Sorry I haven't quoted any of your mancrushes from Jersey Shore. "Yo, Pauly D, aks her if she is DTF (scratch, scratch in the groin area)?"

You seem to know a lot about shows douchebags watch that I never have.

[FAX]

This reminds me of that famous story that Grampa FAX related about that one time when he and Grandma FAX were preparing to go out and she was standing before the full-length mirror.

She kept remarking about how her dress made her look lumpy and how her haircut looked bad and how her shoes made her feet look big. Anyhow, she turned to Grampa FAX and said, "You know, you could give me a compliment once in awhile. It wouldn't hurt you." So, Grampa FAX thought for a moment and said, "Your eyesight is perfect. Let's roll."

FAX

[JD10367]

Okay, I've gone back and looked at the OP again. After further analyzation:

"She's going for her PhD, it takes up a lot of her time & I felt a tad bit neglected. I know it's tough for her as it is but I told her how I felt. She told me in response that she loves me to death but doesn't feel the same about being in love with me anymore....."

In the first place, I don't get how a guy feels "neglected". But, anyway, the phrasing "I told her how I felt" has me concerned. Are you saying you basically were hinting she needed to choose between her PhD and spending more time with you? Because, not only is that pretty selfish, it would fairly irritate her, I'd think, leading to an off-the-cuff "**** you" type of reply. However, I also have a concern about how she jumped from your point to her response.

Guy: "You know, I feel kind of neglected."
Girl: "I'm not in love with you any more."

Sounds like she was basically using any opportunity to dump you.

[FAX]

That "never look back" stuff is easier said than done. But, it's good advice, nonetheless.

I once dated a nurse who worked at UCLA. Redhead. Nice tittahs. Nice blue eyes. She took care of me for a few weeks while I was in the hospital and then for a few weeks more once I was released. I messed up somehow ... probably got drunk, ate some Quaaludes, and said or did some outrageous and unspeakably horrific things or something along those lines. Anyhow, after she broke it off, I called her for a date and she said, "Never go back.". Apparently, I missed my one and only opportunity for a long and loving relationship with that particular nurse. Dang.

FAX