Hypothetical: Get reincarnated here.

[Rain Man]

Just for fun, I've been dividing the world up into regions, and just finished last night. I divided the world into 16,789 regions based on states, provinces, communities, islands, arrondissements, or whatever else happened to be handy.

I didn't know what to do with it, so I created a reincarnation simulator. Sign up here and learn about your next life in advance. I'll give you:

Gender: (Male or Female)
Intelligence: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Attractiveness: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Economic Status: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Nation of Future Birth
Region of Future Birth
Population of that Region (which is somewhat useless since the boundaries are generally manmade, but hey, I've got it)

All statuses are relative to the region that you're in, not the world. So if you draw a 50 on economic status and you're born in the Badghis regions of Afghanistan, that means that you're at the median status of Badghis residents.

Sign up below if you're interested in the early release of your next life. I'll do three reincarnations per day, with the goal that we can discuss and decide which of the three has the best future fate awaiting them. Feel free to post pictures, maps, or descriptions of the reincarnated person's life as you see it.

So sign up below and we'll do the first three today.


Methodology: All figures are random. The probability of being born into a particular region is based on the population of that region.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by GloucesterChief

With an intelligence of 4 I am not sure I would realize that my life sucks....though Jordan is a whole lot more progressive in regards to women then say Saudi Arabia.

You're definitely in the best place in the middle east other than probably Israel. But yeah, you probably won't care much about geopolitics, and will invest most of your mental energy on hard candies and Spongebob.

[Dave Lane]

Originally Posted by GloucesterChief

With an intelligence of 4 I am not sure I would realize that my life sucks....though Jordan is a whole lot more progressive in regards to women then say Saudi Arabia.

We'll you are a 1.6 on the looks scale and if you round up that's a solid 2 so you got that going for you.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by New World Order

I'm in!

New World Order will be one of those women that everyone wants to know. Smart, attractive, and probably a snappy dresser.

Gender Female
Intelligence 87
Appearance 80
Wealth 54
Nation China
Region Guang'an
Population 4,304,219

She'll have a nicely decorated apartment that overlooks the river, because she's willing to make a few financial sacrifices to be surrounded by beauty.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Sorce

Should I expect pictures of your last meal in the what's for dinner thread?

Sorce chokes on a chicken bone, and nine months later arrives again.

Gender Male
Intelligence 64
Appearance 100
Wealth 29
Nation Democratic Republic of the Congo
Region Lomami
Population 2,048,839

Let's just address the obvious here. Every tribeswoman in the region looks at you and sighs. And not only that, but you've got game. You're smart enough to hold a good conversation, but not so smart that you'll be avoiding the bars every weekend. You are scoring constantly with the top chicks in Kabinda and for that matter the whole Lomami province when you can hitch a ride to other villages.

The downside is that you probably only own one shirt, and it says, "Kansas City Chiefs, 1997 Super Bowl Champions", but that's not going to stop you. Sadly, though, you spend more time letting women fondle you than you do improving your station in life, so you're kind of stagnant, living on a cot in the back area of an open-air fruit store on this street:

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Gadzooks

DO ME!!!11!!!!!
Do me hard
Do me like you just got out of jail.

Wait, what I meant to say was "I'm in"? (that's got some weird overtones too).

Please add me to the list of users that will receive a hypothetical reincarnation that's based on a process that produces random results.

Gender Female
Intelligence 25
Appearance 89
Wealth 99
Nation Pakistan
Region Hyderabad
Population 1,565,000

Gadzooks is an archetypal valley girl, but she's an Indus Valley Girl. Not bright at all, but smoking hot and quite wealthy. Gadzooks will attend an elite private school with western clothing and travel to Europe a couple of times a year to shop. On the streets of Hyderabad, she will pretend to hand beggars money out the window of her Mercedes, but will then pull up 10 feet every time they reach for it. And she'll likely have a racy webcam show just for fun, unaware that her relatives are considering killing her for it.

She lives here when she's not traveling.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Bwana

Oh what the heck let me know Rain Man.

Gender Female
Intelligence 1
Appearance 62
Wealth 41
Nation Turkey
Region Denizli
Population 978,700

Um...yikes. You are one vulnerable female. I had to look this up, and you'll likely have an IQ in the 50s, which means that you won't finish elementary school and can do simple tasks with very close supervision. But hey, you have a nice figure, so you've got that going for you.

I suspect you'll live on the ground floor of this apartment building, because if you lived on an upper floor you'd probably fall off the balcony. Tough break.

https://www.google.com/maps/@37.8044...7i13312!8i6656

[Gadzooks]

Not too shabby. (other than the potential honor killing).

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Gadzooks

Not too shabby. (other than the potential honor killing).

You might want to watch out for that.

[Gadzooks]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

You might want to watch out for that.

With my 25 intelligence, I'll probably be blissfully unaware.

[Bwana]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Gender Female
Intelligence 1
Appearance 62
Wealth 41
Nation Turkey
Region Denizli
Population 978,700

Um...yikes. You are one vulnerable female. I had to look this up, and you'll likely have an IQ in the 50s, which means that you won't finish elementary school and can do simple tasks with very close supervision. But hey, you have a nice figure, so you've got that going for you.

I suspect you'll live on the ground floor of this apartment building, because if you lived on an upper floor you'd probably fall off the balcony. Tough break.

https://www.google.com/maps/@37.8044...7i13312!8i6656

Hmm, it looks like I have a future as a top notch hooker!

[stevieray]

I'm in...what the hey

[Hammock Parties]

moi

[Otter]

Put me in coach!

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by stevieray

I'm in...what the hey

Stevieray leads off our recincarnations of the day with...

Gender Male
Intelligence 6
Appearance 55
Wealth 59
Nation China
Region Chaoyang
Population 3,322,224

Man, the intelligence scores are plummeting in the latest reincarnations. But stevieray will be smart enough to hold a low-level job, and he'll be well liked by his coworkers who also dismantle recycled electronics because they can give him all the stuff with mercury in it. He's well-built to survive the Manchurian winter and women view his simple life philosophies and everyman looks positively. He gets some support from his parents and lives on a middle floor in a place like this:

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Stevieray leads off our recincarnations of the day with...



GenderMale

Intelligence6

Appearance55

Wealth59

Nation China

RegionChaoyang

Population3,322,224



Man, the intelligence scores are plummeting in the latest reincarnations. But stevieray will be smart enough to hold a low-level job, and he'll be well liked by his coworkers who also dismantle recycled electronics because they can give him all the stuff with mercury in it. He's well-built to survive the Manchurian winter and women view his simple life philosophies and everyman looks positively. He gets some support from his parents and lives on a middle floor in a place like this:

Intelligence of 6 and you think he can hold a low level job? He'll be lucky if he can fasten his own Velcro shoes.