WHITLOCK: If you believe Priest is back … - Page 3

Hammock Parties · 10:00 PM

The dude is a machine. Mad props, Jason!

http://www.kansascity.com/sports/chi...ry/207210.html

Overshadowed by Pawn Holmes’ announcement that he plans to return to the Chiefs were shocking developments in Jared Allen’s contract negotiations with the Chiefs.

Carl Peterson released a second statement Wednesday afternoon, divulging that Bobby Bell, Neil Smith and Art Still also informed the Chiefs they planned to report to training camp on Saturday and restart their playing careers.

Here are a few excerpts from the second press release:

•Bobby said he began contemplating a return after studying tape of Kendrell Bell’s 2006 season and learning of Kendrell’s salary.

“We see Bobby as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “He’s a unique individual we should never count out. Also, given Bobby’s advanced age, it’s important that fans realize Bobby can fly to road games at a senior, discounted rate. With the way gas prices are today, the savings that we’ll realize over the course of a 16-game schedule could easily run into the 10s and 20s of dollars.”

Coach Herm Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Bobby. The first thing we’ll need to do is make sure we have plenty of oatmeal and prune juice in River Falls. We’ll have a port-a-potty go with Bobby from drill to drill in case he needs to relieve himself.”

•Neil said he started thinking about a comeback when the Brigade lost in the first round of the AFL playoffs. He said the embarrassing loss reminded him of his days with the Chiefs.

“We see Neil as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “Neil has incredible tenacity and a never-give-up spirit that will help our football team. We understand that Neil is going back into the restaurant business.

“Personally, I found Copeland’s to be terrific. Denny Thum and I sat down with Neil, conferred with chefs in Kansas City and Miami, and we all agreed that Neil should serve the Chiefs in two capacities. We reached an agreement for Neil to cater all team meals.

“This agreement puts us ahead of the rest of the league. We can now eliminate per diems for all employees when we’re on the road. Cajun food is a lot of rice and seafood. Well, as you know, rice is very inexpensive, and Neil likes to fish. Neil will have all Fridays off, and he and I will spend those afternoons fishing at Brush Creek on The Plaza. We invite all Chiefs fans to join us.”

Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Neil. Most pregame meals will be some sort of etouffee. Don’t get it twisted, Neil makes a wonderful etouffee. It’s his mama’s recipe from what I understand.

“Yes, an etouffee can make a man a little gassy, but that’s the beauty of playing at an outstanding outdoor facility. With crowd noise, TV microphones won’t pick up a sound and with the right wind conditions the opposition might have trouble breathing. You know the old cliché, the smeller’s the feller.”

•Art said he first considered a comeback when he heard the disturbing news that Ryan Sims still had trade value after his five-year, five-sack stint in Kansas City.

“We see Art as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “Since Marty Schottenheimer left and with the softening of season-ticket sales, we’ve been looking for great defensive players who can excel in front of empty seats and when the team is out of the playoff race by November. Art’s signing might inspire Albert Lewis, Deron Cherry, Bill Maas, Kevin Ross and Dino Hackett to consider rejoining us. Plus, as everyone knows, Art was always in excellent condition.

“Art will double as our strength and conditioning coach. Actually, we’re going to fire the entire staff. Art will lead us in prepractice calisthenics, postpractice weightlifting and all conditioning drills. He’ll do the job of three men, and we’ll pass these savings along to the Hunt family in hopes that they will extend my contract.”

Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Art. Where I think he’ll have instant impact is with jumping jacks and bear crawls. You’d be amazed at how many players don’t know how to do a proper jumping jack.”

•With these signings, the Chiefs have scheduled a Sept. 23 Super Bowl ring ceremony for their home opener.

“Of course, Bobby and Neil are Super Bowl winners and have three Super Bowl rings between them,” Peterson explained.

“These fine men have donated their rings to me, and we’ll cut the rings into 53 pieces and give every man on our roster a piece of a Super Bowl ring. We’ll show highlights of Bobby’s and Neil’s Super Bowl exploits on the Jumbotron. We will digitally manipulate Neil’s Broncos uniform to look like a Chiefs uniform, and you’ll see me standing along the Denver sideline in a black leather trench coat celebrating like I had nothing to do with choosing Elvis Grbac over Rich Gannon.”

**HemiEd** · 07-27-2007, 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Logical

Goat Chiefs is worried he will not be able to heap his man love on LJ so he loves this poorly thought out article by Whitlock. What a suprise.

This article struck my funny bone, initially. However, the second time through it, after thinking about for a while, it could be damaging to Jwhits career.
He has crossed the line on a few things.

El Jefe · 07-27-2007, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcxiv

read the first paragraph and i got tired of it.

Dito

InChiefsHeaven · 07-27-2007, 09:47 AM

I thought it was funny...maybe I'm losing my grip. But I don't see how he could lose his job over it...he doesn't work for the Chiefs...

**Baby Lee** · 07-27-2007, 09:57 AM

So, we're back to Bledsoe's Gay territory?

Vegas_Dave · 07-27-2007, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GOATSE

Wow. You need to get a grip.

Hi Kettle, I'm the Pot, did you know you were Black?

**Skip Towne** · 07-27-2007, 10:11 AM

Whitlock needs to go. The Chiefs haven't done anything in the playoffs since he's been around.

htismaqe · 07-27-2007, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skip Towne

Whitlock needs to go. The Chiefs haven't done anything in he playoffs since he's been around.

Kerberos · 07-27-2007, 10:13 AM

As much as I hate to admit it Zach is correct.

JWhit has written some of the BEST columns I have read .... THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM. PERIOD

As far as us jumping all over ourselves to read his column? Sorry to burts your bubble Goatcheeze but I will read it if you post it hear but I won't go out of my way to look for it on the Star website.

HUGE difference IMO.

LOCOChief · 07-27-2007, 10:37 AM

I'm reposting sorry won't happen again but..
all bets are out, including fatlocks Not a great article IMO. Let's face it Priest was a champion, and he thinks he still has that ability to prove it once again. It's ok for us to be sceptical as to whether or not he can accomplish this, but for Fatass to question his motives is reeruned and cheap. Whitlock is the guy that thinks his wife is cheating on him, because he himself cheats. He's never had the heart of a champ therefore can't possibly understand the drive or desire that fuels the fire. I'm not saying that Priest can return to the form that made us love this guy, but I for one am sure as hell no going to say he can't. I I certainly don't think JW should be questioning his motives and by questioning Carls he's questioning Priests (takes two to tango Fatass and the fat man that can't dance thinks the band sucks) Translation: I'm sure as hell glad Carls running the day to day business ops of the Chiefs and not you.

__________________

**HemiEd** · 07-27-2007, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skip Towne

Whitlock needs to go. The Chiefs haven't done anything in the playoffs since he's been around.

Great observation, it is JWhit's fault! Adios Jason!

Calcountry · 07-27-2007, 12:09 PM

Jason looked real good on Jim Rome is burning, He has a TREMENDOUS show for your today.

**Mr. Flopnuts** · 07-27-2007, 12:13 PM

This was a vanity article for Jason. He's said all along that there was no way Priest was coming back. I don't live in KC and haven't read a lot of what he's written, but my experience is the guy can't eat crow. This is as close as he ever gets when he's wrong about something. Make fun of the guy that proves him wrong.

**Rain Man** · 07-27-2007, 12:15 PM

That article is a bit insulting to Chiefs legend Bobby Bell.

RustShack · 07-27-2007, 01:16 PM

Whitlock just gets stupider with age.

07-26-2007, 09:44 PM
Hammock Parties I'll be back. Join Date: Nov 2002 Casino cash: $4320478	WHITLOCK: If you believe Priest is back … The dude is a machine. Mad props, Jason! http://www.kansascity.com/sports/chi...ry/207210.html Overshadowed by Pawn Holmes’ announcement that he plans to return to the Chiefs were shocking developments in Jared Allen’s contract negotiations with the Chiefs. Carl Peterson released a second statement Wednesday afternoon, divulging that Bobby Bell, Neil Smith and Art Still also informed the Chiefs they planned to report to training camp on Saturday and restart their playing careers. Here are a few excerpts from the second press release: •Bobby said he began contemplating a return after studying tape of Kendrell Bell’s 2006 season and learning of Kendrell’s salary. “We see Bobby as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “He’s a unique individual we should never count out. Also, given Bobby’s advanced age, it’s important that fans realize Bobby can fly to road games at a senior, discounted rate. With the way gas prices are today, the savings that we’ll realize over the course of a 16-game schedule could easily run into the 10s and 20s of dollars.” Coach Herm Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Bobby. The first thing we’ll need to do is make sure we have plenty of oatmeal and prune juice in River Falls. We’ll have a port-a-potty go with Bobby from drill to drill in case he needs to relieve himself.” •Neil said he started thinking about a comeback when the Brigade lost in the first round of the AFL playoffs. He said the embarrassing loss reminded him of his days with the Chiefs. “We see Neil as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “Neil has incredible tenacity and a never-give-up spirit that will help our football team. We understand that Neil is going back into the restaurant business. “Personally, I found Copeland’s to be terrific. Denny Thum and I sat down with Neil, conferred with chefs in Kansas City and Miami, and we all agreed that Neil should serve the Chiefs in two capacities. We reached an agreement for Neil to cater all team meals. “This agreement puts us ahead of the rest of the league. We can now eliminate per diems for all employees when we’re on the road. Cajun food is a lot of rice and seafood. Well, as you know, rice is very inexpensive, and Neil likes to fish. Neil will have all Fridays off, and he and I will spend those afternoons fishing at Brush Creek on The Plaza. We invite all Chiefs fans to join us.” Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Neil. Most pregame meals will be some sort of etouffee. Don’t get it twisted, Neil makes a wonderful etouffee. It’s his mama’s recipe from what I understand. “Yes, an etouffee can make a man a little gassy, but that’s the beauty of playing at an outstanding outdoor facility. With crowd noise, TV microphones won’t pick up a sound and with the right wind conditions the opposition might have trouble breathing. You know the old cliché, the smeller’s the feller.” •Art said he first considered a comeback when he heard the disturbing news that Ryan Sims still had trade value after his five-year, five-sack stint in Kansas City. “We see Art as a third-down pass rusher,” Peterson explained. “Since Marty Schottenheimer left and with the softening of season-ticket sales, we’ve been looking for great defensive players who can excel in front of empty seats and when the team is out of the playoff race by November. Art’s signing might inspire Albert Lewis, Deron Cherry, Bill Maas, Kevin Ross and Dino Hackett to consider rejoining us. Plus, as everyone knows, Art was always in excellent condition. “Art will double as our strength and conditioning coach. Actually, we’re going to fire the entire staff. Art will lead us in prepractice calisthenics, postpractice weightlifting and all conditioning drills. He’ll do the job of three men, and we’ll pass these savings along to the Hunt family in hopes that they will extend my contract.” Edwards added: “We’ll take it very slow with Art. Where I think he’ll have instant impact is with jumping jacks and bear crawls. You’d be amazed at how many players don’t know how to do a proper jumping jack.” •With these signings, the Chiefs have scheduled a Sept. 23 Super Bowl ring ceremony for their home opener. “Of course, Bobby and Neil are Super Bowl winners and have three Super Bowl rings between them,” Peterson explained. “These fine men have donated their rings to me, and we’ll cut the rings into 53 pieces and give every man on our roster a piece of a Super Bowl ring. We’ll show highlights of Bobby’s and Neil’s Super Bowl exploits on the Jumbotron. We will digitally manipulate Neil’s Broncos uniform to look like a Chiefs uniform, and you’ll see me standing along the Denver sideline in a black leather trench coat celebrating like I had nothing to do with choosing Elvis Grbac over Rich Gannon.” Last edited by Hammock Parties; 07-26-2007 at 10:00 PM..
Posts: 278,990

07-27-2007, 09:47 AM	#33
InChiefsHeaven Rockin' yer FACE OFF! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Omaha, Nebraska Casino cash: $3514937	I thought it was funny...maybe I'm losing my grip. But I don't see how he could lose his job over it...he doesn't work for the Chiefs... __________________ We have a million reasons for failure, but not one excuse... Die Donks, DIE!! Holy Crap fellas!!! We did it!!! THREE TIMES!!!
Posts: 25,843

07-27-2007, 09:57 AM	#34
Baby Lee Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $6838598	So, we're back to Bledsoe's Gay territory? __________________ We need the kind of courage that can withstand the subtle corruption of the cynics - E.W.
Posts: 95,642

07-27-2007, 10:11 AM	#36
Skip Towne Supporter Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: T-Town Casino cash: $10004900	Whitlock needs to go. The Chiefs haven't done anything in the playoffs since he's been around.
Posts: 69,689

07-27-2007, 10:13 AM	#38
Kerberos Chiefs Baby Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Henderson, NV Casino cash: $10000632	As much as I hate to admit it Zach is correct. JWhit has written some of the BEST columns I have read .... THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM. PERIOD As far as us jumping all over ourselves to read his column? Sorry to burts your bubble Goatcheeze but I will read it if you post it hear but I won't go out of my way to look for it on the Star website. HUGE difference IMO.
Posts: 5,638

07-27-2007, 10:37 AM	#39
LOCOChief True Chiefs Fan Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Bull Bay Casino cash: $6605791	I'm reposting sorry won't happen again but.. all bets are out, including fatlocks Not a great article IMO. Let's face it Priest was a champion, and he thinks he still has that ability to prove it once again. It's ok for us to be sceptical as to whether or not he can accomplish this, but for Fatass to question his motives is reeruned and cheap. Whitlock is the guy that thinks his wife is cheating on him, because he himself cheats. He's never had the heart of a champ therefore can't possibly understand the drive or desire that fuels the fire. I'm not saying that Priest can return to the form that made us love this guy, but I for one am sure as hell no going to say he can't. I I certainly don't think JW should be questioning his motives and by questioning Carls he's questioning Priests (takes two to tango Fatass and the fat man that can't dance thinks the band sucks) Translation: I'm sure as hell glad Carls running the day to day business ops of the Chiefs and not you. __________________
Posts: 5,453

07-27-2007, 12:09 PM	#41
Calcountry Shoot the tube Join Date: Oct 2003 Casino cash: $8721645	Jason looked real good on Jim Rome is burning, He has a TREMENDOUS show for your today.
Posts: 28,251

07-27-2007, 12:15 PM	#43
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $2928491 VARSITY	That article is a bit insulting to Chiefs legend Bobby Bell. __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,776

07-27-2007, 01:16 PM	#44
RustShack **** That Noise Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Jack Trice Casino cash: $4586954	Whitlock just gets stupider with age. __________________
Posts: 15,049