Job interview - make your destiny here. - Page 3

**Rain Man** · 11-27-2006, 06:17 PM

I'm thinking about hiring someone, and my lawyer tells me that I need to open up my search beyond merely competent, trained people. So if you'd like to be considered for an exciting career in market research, please answer the following questions in this initial interview. If you answer the questions properly, I'll give you a job.

On your mark, get set, go.

Situational Questions

1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do?
2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do?
3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do?
4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do?
5. You are on a business trip with your boss. At dinner, your boss stands up and accidentally hits a tray being carried by a waiter. The tray tips and the waiter falls. As he goes down, he clutches frantically and accidentally grabs the strapless evening gown of a beautiful woman at the next table, pulling it off of her. Screaming, she jumps up and tries to cover herself with the tablecloth, pulling all of the food off the table. One of the candles ignites the Baked Alaska, and the carpet catches on fire. Everybody runs, and within minutes the entire restaurant goes up in flames. You and your boss are separated amidst the chaos, and you have to hitchhike home because he had the airline tickets. Once you arrive back at the office, what do you say or do?
6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do?

Personality Questions

7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why?
8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why?
9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why?
10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. How do you think he died?
11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next?
12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is?

**DaFace** · 11-27-2006, 07:02 PM

Wow...this is really complicated. Fortunately, I need something to burn some time until MNF...

1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do?

The next morning, sneak into her office while wearing the King outfit. Hide under her desk until she comes in, then pop up slowly, stare at her, and give her a croissanwich. Silently walk away. She'll love it so much that she'll HAVE to keep the King.

2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do?

Ha...easy one. Grab it and throw it back at the soldier, winning the appreciation of everyone in the room. Hey, it works in movies, right?

3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do?

Depends on the boss. I'd say the logical thing to do would be to run off with one life preserver and let the boss and the anvil duke it out for the other one. If your boss is stupid enough to think a life preserver is going to make an anvil float, he probably deserves his fate. (Probably not a very good answer for a job interview...)

4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do?

Pull the fire alarm. Not only will the human belonging to those feet likely be humiliated by having to run out with his pants around his ankles, chances are he'll leave the document lying on the floor, at which time it can easily be perused for any interesting information by anyone who just happens to be lagging behind.

5. You are on a business trip with your boss. At dinner, your boss stands up and accidentally hits a tray being carried by a waiter. The tray tips and the waiter falls. As he goes down, he clutches frantically and accidentally grabs the strapless evening gown of a beautiful woman at the next table, pulling it off of her. Screaming, she jumps up and tries to cover herself with the tablecloth, pulling all of the food off the table. One of the candles ignites the Baked Alaska, and the carpet catches on fire. Everybody runs, and within minutes the entire restaurant goes up in flames. You and your boss are separated amidst the chaos, and you have to hitchhike home because he had the airline tickets. Once you arrive back at the office, what do you say or do?

Take the blame for the entire ordeal. A boss has enough stress, so there's no need for him to have to deal with the added stress of believing he ruined the Baked Alaska. (Mandatory job interview suck up the the future boss answer

)

6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do?

Volunteer my best friend, who still owes me for helping him move three times last year.

7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why?
Hmm...probably an asteroid. You get to do your own thing most of the time, and you always have a bunch of friends around. And if you ever choose to break out of your prescribed path, you might get to destroy a civilization!

8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why?
Franz Joseph II, Prince of Liechtenstein. He managed to keep Liechtenstein out of the war, even though just about every country around them was involved in it. Plus, he was the prince of a place called Liechtenstein. Funny name, Liechtenstein. Heh.

9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why?
They would figure out what I need and deliver it to my house for me. I hate going to the grocery store.

10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. How do you think he died?
He probably tried to get all buddy buddy with a grizzly bear or something. Idiot.

11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next?
Wait...Pairs Hilton isn't a hooker?

12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is?
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592...

big nasty kcnut · 11-27-2006, 07:05 PM

1. Tell her she right and Tell her to get a tivo and skip it.
2. Throw a intern on the bomb and then continue your presentation.
3. knock out your boss and put the life vest on and when he wakes up tell him that you were both knocked out and we lost the anvil.
4. Scan the proposal and then bring up their stuff in your presentation to secure the bid.
5. Ask your boss if he ok then tell him to give you a vp job, raise and vacation or you tell the cops he started the fire.

6. Hire some temp people to help him move and then you and him go to vegas to have fun.

7. The sun cause i'm all powerful and very bright.

8. Gen.Rommel cause he was a great leader and alway had great ideas.

9.have a coffee bar with computer that have internet so i have someone shop for me while i'm online on chiefs planet.

10. He died of pulmonary edema.

11. The preist kill paris then go party with the hooker.

12. 58

**Bob Dole** · 11-27-2006, 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

My lawyer just checked, and hypereyebrowemia is not recognized as a legal disability.

Bob Dole is familiar with section 508 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973 and has taken the steps to establish his condition as a qualified disability.

This ain't Bob Dole's first rodeo, mister.

**Iowanian** · 11-27-2006, 07:16 PM

1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do?

I inform them that while a novel idea initially, the effectiveness of the campaign has worn off. I suggest that they break from commercial advertising traditions, and create 1 more ad, that will signal to the buying public that the ad will be no more. I have a prepared story board in which The Burger KING is on a small row boat, it his robe is covered with Wendy's, Hardees and McD's stickers....the boat, filled with the transfatty products used by those companies on their fries. Suddenly, a newer boat, with a team of clean cut, handsome Burger King Employees roars into nearby hostile waters.....standing on the stern, the new Hero of a series of impending commercials draws back and looses a flaming arrow into the competition, and old kingpin of their campaign, bursting it into flames and sinking the boat.

2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do?

This is the simpliest sollution of all. I Leap into action, in a flash, I grab the newest intern and throw them atop the potato masher. Reasoned thinking knows that the Intern is a low paid and easily replacable employee. They have no health care or life insurance coverage that can have a negative effect on the rates for the companies policy.

**Bob Dole** · 11-27-2006, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iowanian

1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do?

I inform them that while a novel idea initially, the effectiveness of the campaign has worn off. I suggest that they break from commercial advertising traditions, and create 1 more ad, that will signal to the buying public that the ad will be no more. I have a prepared story board in which The Burger KING is on a small row boat, it his robe is covered with Wendy's, Hardees and McD's stickers....the boat, filled with the transfatty products used by those companies on their fries. Suddenly, a newer boat, with a team of clean cut, handsome Burger King Employees roars into nearby hostile waters.....standing on the stern, the new Hero of a series of impending commercials draws back and looses a flaming arrow into the competition, and old kingpin of their campaign, bursting it into flames and sinking the boat.

It would have been better, if during the Darth Vader face-off, Darth Vader had removed his giant, misshapen head with his light sabre.

**Bwana** · 11-27-2006, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

So if you'd like to be considered for an exciting career in market research,

*snicker*

**Iowanian** · 11-27-2006, 07:26 PM

3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do?

Fortunately for me, the boss, who refused my raise and sent me to Toledo over Christmas looked away. I know have his prized anvil for sale on Ebay.

4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do?

I quickly grab the secret plan, take it to the furthest stall, and after quickly scanning it and making mental cliff notes, I deficate inside the portfolio binder, and place it back where it was originally located.

I remove the wash clothes from the bowl on the sink, fill it with lukewarm water, reach my arm under the door of the stall, and dump it into the down trowsers of the competition. NoONE has a 'top secret plan' to remove food from my table and doesn't find a blast across the bow of his row boat.

I then exit the room and "accidently" walk by the table of the clients awaiting the competition, and make nice before leaving after presenting them my card.

Thats how I roll.

**Rain Man** · 11-27-2006, 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

*snicker*

Hey, it could happen. Did I ever tell you about the time we got a data file that had been parsed incorrectly, and all of the survey responses were off by one question? It was heart-pounding.

**Iowanian** · 11-27-2006, 07:30 PM

5. I have no comment regarding the alleged event on the night of the fire in question.

6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do?

This is also easy. I inform the boss that I'll see to it that he has assistance relocating his prized anvil collection. I'm now making calls to 2 of the strongest interns on the staff, informing them of their mandatory task on saturday. If they complete the task without damaging the anvils, I'll let them go home at 3pm next friday.

**DaFace** · 11-27-2006, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

*snicker*

Hell, I'd take it. It's gotta be better than fixing computers all day long.

**Bwana** · 11-27-2006, 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Hey, it could happen. Did I ever tell you about the time we got a data file that had been parsed incorrectly, and all of the survey responses were off by one question? It was heart-pounding.

Heh, I wasn't tossing flames at the position big boy. I was tossing out a little snicker at my own VERY SHORT research career.

JBucc · 11-27-2006, 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I'm thinking about hiring someone, and my lawyer tells me that I need to open up my search beyond merely competent, trained people. So if you'd like to be considered for an exciting career in market research, please answer the following questions in this initial interview. If you answer the questions properly, I'll give you a job.

On your mark, get set, go.

Situational Questions

1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do?

It could always be worse. Your mascot could be a gay clown in a yellow suit.
2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do?

I say "Oh shit!, a Nazi soldier just threw on of those potato masher grenades into the room." Then run.
3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do?]

Damn Nazi's. I pull out my GPS navigation system and save our location point so the anvil can be retrieved later.
4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do?

Read it quickly, then wipe my ass with the pages.
5. You are on a business trip with your boss. At dinner, your boss stands up and accidentally hits a tray being carried by a waiter. The tray tips and the waiter falls. As he goes down, he clutches frantically and accidentally grabs the strapless evening gown of a beautiful woman at the next table, pulling it off of her. Screaming, she jumps up and tries to cover herself with the tablecloth, pulling all of the food off the table. One of the candles ignites the Baked Alaska, and the carpet catches on fire. Everybody runs, and within minutes the entire restaurant goes up in flames. You and your boss are separated amidst the chaos, and you have to hitchhike home because he had the airline tickets. Once you arrive back at the office, what do you say or do?

"How cool was that fire? BTW, I just wanted to thank you for helping me get a jumpstart on my exercise program. Lord knows I kneed it. You are always looking out for me."
6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do?

I'm busy. I have to go and get that other anvil. Sorry.

Personality Questions

7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why?

I'm all of them. You just said so
8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why?

Rommel because of my studliness and my desire to take over Africa
9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why?

I'd have to drug dealers like Jay and Silent Bob hang out up front for my entertainment
10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. How do you think he died?

A snowmobile accident in Cancun
11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next?

Is this a trick question?
12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is?

27

**Iowanian** · 11-27-2006, 07:43 PM

7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why?

Mars. They don't call it the "red" planet because its communist or sunburned....its was colonized by Chiefs fans. Beings that I'll be the only native of the local, and its the natural next step in market expansion, my abilities to speak the language and interpret the cultural aspects make my leverage GREAT at my next review.
8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why?

Rommel. I'm an imposing force when determined and can lead a battalion of researches through heat, drought and the most imposing of Allied circumstances.

9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why?

My grocery store? The wife shops.
The changes I'd make if I were a market share owner would be semi-disposable mini computers that shoppers could purchase monthly, add credit and use as a debit card...On this device, I'd have digital coupons and ads for the products I wished to move, the customer could create their shopping list, insert it into the slot on the cutting edge shopping carts, be reminded of complimentary items(you're buying hotdogs....how about these buns and some ketchup?) and advised as to their location.

10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. how did he die?

He was bitten on the tongue by A poisonous Terrantula nesting in the entagled vines of Jane's cooter canyon.

11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next? Paris Hilton announces that her Wedding tackle is overexposed and worn ragged....the Hooker offers to sell hers to Paris, but its been worn tonight...the Priest takes it from her hand, spatters it with holy water and negotiates that Paris provide cheese and crackers for the orphanage in exhange for his blessing the transaction with good fortune and clean living.

12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is?

The Number, is 37

**Bob Dole** · 11-27-2006, 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaFace

Hell, I'd take it. It's gotta be better than fixing computers all day long.

Pretty much anything on "Dirty Jobs" would be better than that crap.

kc-nd · 11-27-2006, 08:09 PM

#4.

I once got ahold of a competitor's plan, read it, realized it wasn't worth the paper it was printed on, and then put it back where I found it.

Lesson:

If you aren't smarter than your competition and can't come up with a better plan yourself, you're never going to make it in the long run.

11-27-2006, 06:17 PM
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-682449 VARSITY	Job interview - make your destiny here. I'm thinking about hiring someone, and my lawyer tells me that I need to open up my search beyond merely competent, trained people. So if you'd like to be considered for an exciting career in market research, please answer the following questions in this initial interview. If you answer the questions properly, I'll give you a job. On your mark, get set, go. Situational Questions 1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do? 2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do? 3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do? 4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do? 5. You are on a business trip with your boss. At dinner, your boss stands up and accidentally hits a tray being carried by a waiter. The tray tips and the waiter falls. As he goes down, he clutches frantically and accidentally grabs the strapless evening gown of a beautiful woman at the next table, pulling it off of her. Screaming, she jumps up and tries to cover herself with the tablecloth, pulling all of the food off the table. One of the candles ignites the Baked Alaska, and the carpet catches on fire. Everybody runs, and within minutes the entire restaurant goes up in flames. You and your boss are separated amidst the chaos, and you have to hitchhike home because he had the airline tickets. Once you arrive back at the office, what do you say or do? 6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do? Personality Questions 7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why? 8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why? 9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why? 10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. How do you think he died? 11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next? 12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is?
Posts: 145,512

11-27-2006, 07:02 PM	#31
DaFace Kind of a mod Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Donkey Land Casino cash: $-1883101	Wow...this is really complicated. Fortunately, I need something to burn some time until MNF... 1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do? The next morning, sneak into her office while wearing the King outfit. Hide under her desk until she comes in, then pop up slowly, stare at her, and give her a croissanwich. Silently walk away. She'll love it so much that she'll HAVE to keep the King. 2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do? Ha...easy one. Grab it and throw it back at the soldier, winning the appreciation of everyone in the room. Hey, it works in movies, right? 3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do? Depends on the boss. I'd say the logical thing to do would be to run off with one life preserver and let the boss and the anvil duke it out for the other one. If your boss is stupid enough to think a life preserver is going to make an anvil float, he probably deserves his fate. (Probably not a very good answer for a job interview...) 4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do? Pull the fire alarm. Not only will the human belonging to those feet likely be humiliated by having to run out with his pants around his ankles, chances are he'll leave the document lying on the floor, at which time it can easily be perused for any interesting information by anyone who just happens to be lagging behind. 5. You are on a business trip with your boss. At dinner, your boss stands up and accidentally hits a tray being carried by a waiter. The tray tips and the waiter falls. As he goes down, he clutches frantically and accidentally grabs the strapless evening gown of a beautiful woman at the next table, pulling it off of her. Screaming, she jumps up and tries to cover herself with the tablecloth, pulling all of the food off the table. One of the candles ignites the Baked Alaska, and the carpet catches on fire. Everybody runs, and within minutes the entire restaurant goes up in flames. You and your boss are separated amidst the chaos, and you have to hitchhike home because he had the airline tickets. Once you arrive back at the office, what do you say or do? Take the blame for the entire ordeal. A boss has enough stress, so there's no need for him to have to deal with the added stress of believing he ruined the Baked Alaska. (Mandatory job interview suck up the the future boss answer ) 6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do? Volunteer my best friend, who still owes me for helping him move three times last year. 7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why? Hmm...probably an asteroid. You get to do your own thing most of the time, and you always have a bunch of friends around. And if you ever choose to break out of your prescribed path, you might get to destroy a civilization! 8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why? Franz Joseph II, Prince of Liechtenstein. He managed to keep Liechtenstein out of the war, even though just about every country around them was involved in it. Plus, he was the prince of a place called Liechtenstein. Funny name, Liechtenstein. Heh. 9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why? They would figure out what I need and deliver it to my house for me. I hate going to the grocery store. 10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. How do you think he died? He probably tried to get all buddy buddy with a grizzly bear or something. Idiot. 11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next? Wait...Pairs Hilton isn't a hooker? 12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592...
Posts: 53,154

11-27-2006, 07:05 PM	#32
big nasty kcnut The pizza king of kansas Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Somewhere in the u.s.a. Casino cash: $-2229100	1. Tell her she right and Tell her to get a tivo and skip it. 2. Throw a intern on the bomb and then continue your presentation. 3. knock out your boss and put the life vest on and when he wakes up tell him that you were both knocked out and we lost the anvil. 4. Scan the proposal and then bring up their stuff in your presentation to secure the bid. 5. Ask your boss if he ok then tell him to give you a vp job, raise and vacation or you tell the cops he started the fire. 6. Hire some temp people to help him move and then you and him go to vegas to have fun. 7. The sun cause i'm all powerful and very bright. 8. Gen.Rommel cause he was a great leader and alway had great ideas. 9.have a coffee bar with computer that have internet so i have someone shop for me while i'm online on chiefs planet. 10. He died of pulmonary edema. 11. The preist kill paris then go party with the hooker. 12. 58 __________________ When it's grim, be the grim reaper and go get it. Adopt a chiefs Travis Kelce. You woke up the wrong mother****er!
Posts: 19,419

11-27-2006, 07:16 PM	#34
Iowanian Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Utopia Casino cash: $1668454	1. You are at a party, and you meet a brand manager at Burger King. She mentions that she thinks the whole psychotic king ad theme is getting old, but she’s not sure. What do you say or do? I inform them that while a novel idea initially, the effectiveness of the campaign has worn off. I suggest that they break from commercial advertising traditions, and create 1 more ad, that will signal to the buying public that the ad will be no more. I have a prepared story board in which The Burger KING is on a small row boat, it his robe is covered with Wendy's, Hardees and McD's stickers....the boat, filled with the transfatty products used by those companies on their fries. Suddenly, a newer boat, with a team of clean cut, handsome Burger King Employees roars into nearby hostile waters.....standing on the stern, the new Hero of a series of impending commercials draws back and looses a flaming arrow into the competition, and old kingpin of their campaign, bursting it into flames and sinking the boat. 2. You are in a meeting with the president of the firm, two other senior managers, three other analysts, two interns, and a client who’s picky about their report. Suddenly, a Nazi soldier throws one of those potato masher hand grenades into the room. What do you say or do? This is the simpliest sollution of all. I Leap into action, in a flash, I grab the newest intern and throw them atop the potato masher. Reasoned thinking knows that the Intern is a low paid and easily replacable employee. They have no health care or life insurance coverage that can have a negative effect on the rates for the companies policy.
Posts: 62,945

11-27-2006, 07:26 PM	#37
Iowanian Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Utopia Casino cash: $1668454	3. You are on a cruise ship with your boss when it hits an old Nazi sea mine and sinks. There are only two life preservers left, and you, your boss, and your boss’s prized rare medieval anvil are alone on the deck. What do you say or do? Fortunately for me, the boss, who refused my raise and sent me to Toledo over Christmas looked away. I know have his prized anvil for sale on Ebay. 4. You and your boss are on your way to an interview. You arrive early and visit the restroom, and while inside you see a pair of feet under a stall and a competitor’s proposal sitting on the counter with another document titled, “Our Top-Secret Plan to Beat [your company]”. What do you say or do? I quickly grab the secret plan, take it to the furthest stall, and after quickly scanning it and making mental cliff notes, I deficate inside the portfolio binder, and place it back where it was originally located. I remove the wash clothes from the bowl on the sink, fill it with lukewarm water, reach my arm under the door of the stall, and dump it into the down trowsers of the competition. NoONE has a 'top secret plan' to remove food from my table and doesn't find a blast across the bow of his row boat. I then exit the room and "accidently" walk by the table of the clients awaiting the competition, and make nice before leaving after presenting them my card. Thats how I roll. Last edited by Iowanian; 11-27-2006 at 07:52 PM..
Posts: 62,945

11-27-2006, 07:30 PM	#39
Iowanian Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Utopia Casino cash: $1668454	5. I have no comment regarding the alleged event on the night of the fire in question. 6. Your boss mentions that he’s going to have to move his anvil collection this weekend, and asks for volunteers to help. What do you say or do? This is also easy. I inform the boss that I'll see to it that he has assistance relocating his prized anvil collection. I'm now making calls to 2 of the strongest interns on the staff, informing them of their mandatory task on saturday. If they complete the task without damaging the anvils, I'll let them go home at 3pm next friday.
Posts: 62,945

11-27-2006, 07:43 PM	#43
Iowanian Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Utopia Casino cash: $1668454	7. If you were a planet, dwarf planet, moon, or asteroid, which one would you be, and why? Mars. They don't call it the "red" planet because its communist or sunburned....its was colonized by Chiefs fans. Beings that I'll be the only native of the local, and its the natural next step in market expansion, my abilities to speak the language and interpret the cultural aspects make my leverage GREAT at my next review. 8. Excluding all Americans and English, which major or minor leader or general during World War II do you most resemble in personality, and why? Rommel. I'm an imposing force when determined and can lead a battalion of researches through heat, drought and the most imposing of Allied circumstances. 9. If you could change one thing about your current grocery store, what would it be and why? My grocery store? The wife shops. The changes I'd make if I were a market share owner would be semi-disposable mini computers that shoppers could purchase monthly, add credit and use as a debit card...On this device, I'd have digital coupons and ads for the products I wished to move, the customer could create their shopping list, insert it into the slot on the cutting edge shopping carts, be reminded of complimentary items(you're buying hotdogs....how about these buns and some ketchup?) and advised as to their location. 10. Tarzan lived during the 1930s, as played by Johnny Weismuller. He’s got to be dead by now. how did he die? He was bitten on the tongue by A poisonous Terrantula nesting in the entagled vines of Jane's cooter canyon. 11. A priest, a hooker, and Paris Hilton walk into a bar. What happens next? Paris Hilton announces that her Wedding tackle is overexposed and worn ragged....the Hooker offers to sell hers to Paris, but its been worn tonight...the Priest takes it from her hand, spatters it with holy water and negotiates that Paris provide cheese and crackers for the orphanage in exhange for his blessing the transaction with good fortune and clean living. 12. I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 100. What number do you think it is? The Number, is 37 Last edited by Iowanian; 11-27-2006 at 07:48 PM..
Posts: 62,945

11-27-2006, 08:09 PM	#45
kc-nd Starter Join Date: Feb 2003 Casino cash: $1674900	#4. I once got ahold of a competitor's plan, read it, realized it wasn't worth the paper it was printed on, and then put it back where I found it. Lesson: If you aren't smarter than your competition and can't come up with a better plan yourself, you're never going to make it in the long run.
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