Guyku: Sharpen your writing chops! - Page 3

**gblowfish** · 10-11-2007, 11:27 AM

Hey CPers:

My good friend Vinnie in Chicago is working on a project.
Here's an e-mail he sent to me:

Hey guys, I am working on an idea that I think you can help me with.
It's called; Guyku.

Ya know, guy and haiku.
An example;

She's still in my bed
Her toothbrush sits on the sink
I thought she would leave

Have fun, we're working on a coffee table book and will give attribution lines to all.

vinnie

Here were my suggestions:

Keep out of trouble:
"Yes Dear, You're Right, I'm Sorry"
It works like a charm.

The screaming is shrill
I am inconsiderate
I put the seat down.

Hey, what was your name?
The sun rises in the East...
Oh, sure I'll call you.

I can't stop staring
Wow...thirty-eight double D...
Must avert my eyes!!!

I went to the store
My wife is out of Tampax
God, I'm Pussy Whipped.

Think this is a natural for many of you poetic prose purveyors!

**Rain Man** · 10-11-2007, 01:55 PM

I'm chubby and bald
But I still think I'm handsome
That chick should lose weight

elvomito · 10-11-2007, 02:02 PM

new song now playing
hootie and the blow-huards
what what in the butt

you are very gay
not that there is anything
wrong with that you poof

mountain of fragrance
this pile of laundry aint
washin itself bitch

Chiefnj2 · 10-11-2007, 02:15 PM

Women, dumb questions
Those pants don't make you look fat,
You always look fat.

wilas101 · 10-11-2007, 02:17 PM

A cat in the bar
The Chiefs kick a field goal, yay!
The cat does a flip

The barman says WOW!
Inquiries about TDs
The cats only 3

------------

She took it anal
She got a Dirty Sanchez
Roofies 4 teh win!

-------------

Herm says Huard starts
The Planet, collective melt-down
All experts in here

--------------

Guykus I'm writing
Work I should be doing now
Unemployment check

Wife is upset now
Kids have no shoes or clothing
must write more guykus

Suddenly single
She took the car, house and dog
must write more guykus

Out the game too long
prostitute the only choice
I missed the blisters

Sores are bleeding now
Crust forms around urethra
The worst, yet to come

Homeless, no money
Wife gone, life in shambles now
just one more guyku

Life ruined, love lost
All because of gblowfish
stupid guyku thread

==========================

elvomito · 10-11-2007, 02:23 PM

wilas one oh one
i will buy you an escort
depression is bad

Mark M · 10-11-2007, 02:44 PM

It's threads like these that keep me lurking (even if I don't post as often as I used to).

Oh ... and I'll try to come up with some Guyku later. I pretty much suck at those things (too few words).

MM
~~

**Bob Dole** · 10-11-2007, 02:50 PM

sex drugs rock and roll
at least until the wedding
then not so much sex

**Bob Dole** · 10-11-2007, 02:52 PM

my mind wanders some
I tend to have impure thoughts
I accept the blame

**DaKCMan AP** · 10-11-2007, 03:19 PM

Stop calling me, bitch!
I said that I loved you just
To get in your pants

dogdaze · 10-11-2007, 03:27 PM

bound by ball and chain
the weight increases with time
release me, sweet death.

Braincase · 10-11-2007, 03:49 PM

Oral Sex? I hope!
I am worthy! Castle King!
For I mowed the lawn.

**gblowfish** · 10-11-2007, 04:17 PM

From my pal Mr. Doggity:

Of course I love you
I already said so once
Now get me a beer

Why do you ask me
If that makes your ass look fat?
I will plead the fifth

Where's my foam finger
And my two-beer sippy hat?
It's football season

Ask not who broke wind
He who smelt it hath dealt it
So it must be you

Behold the fisherman
The truth. It is not in him
He smells of strong drink

I envy my dog
He pisses on neighbor's shrubs
And humps his wife's leg

From my pal Ramon T. Peligrosso:

Oh! HGTV…
It’s the Speed Channel for me
When you’ve gone to bed

Dreams of Ferrari
On a cold drizzly Sunday
Driving to Costco

FAX · 10-11-2007, 05:13 PM

I hid all your bras
In the basement yesterday
Ha ha ha ha ha

FAX

**gblowfish** · 10-11-2007, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FAX

I hid all your bras
In the basement yesterday
Ha ha ha ha ha

FAX

I was wondering when you'd show up...

**Rain Man** · 10-11-2007, 06:07 PM

I know everything
Why? Because I am a man
Do not question me

10-11-2007, 11:27 AM
gblowfish Be Kind To Your Pets Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Glorious Independence, MO Casino cash: $16896178 VARSITY	Guyku: Sharpen your writing chops! Hey CPers: My good friend Vinnie in Chicago is working on a project. Here's an e-mail he sent to me: Hey guys, I am working on an idea that I think you can help me with. It's called; Guyku. Ya know, guy and haiku. An example; She's still in my bed Her toothbrush sits on the sink I thought she would leave Have fun, we're working on a coffee table book and will give attribution lines to all. vinnie Here were my suggestions: Keep out of trouble: "Yes Dear, You're Right, I'm Sorry" It works like a charm. The screaming is shrill I am inconsiderate I put the seat down. Hey, what was your name? The sun rises in the East... Oh, sure I'll call you. I can't stop staring Wow...thirty-eight double D... Must avert my eyes!!! I went to the store My wife is out of Tampax God, I'm Pussy Whipped. Think this is a natural for many of you poetic prose purveyors!
Posts: 41,011

10-11-2007, 01:55 PM	#31
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-542449 VARSITY	I'm chubby and bald But I still think I'm handsome That chick should lose weight __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,338

10-11-2007, 02:02 PM	#32
elvomito ☻☺ Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: ♠█♠ Casino cash: $10004900	new song now playing hootie and the blow-huards what what in the butt you are very gay not that there is anything wrong with that you poof mountain of fragrance this pile of laundry aint washin itself bitch
Posts: 2,362

10-11-2007, 02:15 PM	#33
Chiefnj2 In Search of a Life Join Date: Mar 2007 Casino cash: $6664388	Women, dumb questions Those pants don't make you look fat, You always look fat. __________________ Mismanaging the clock.
Posts: 22,540

10-11-2007, 02:17 PM	#34
wilas101 Starter Join Date: Mar 2005 Casino cash: $6279487	A cat in the bar The Chiefs kick a field goal, yay! The cat does a flip The barman says WOW! Inquiries about TDs The cats only 3 ------------ She took it anal She got a Dirty Sanchez Roofies 4 teh win! ------------- Herm says Huard starts The Planet, collective melt-down All experts in here -------------- Guykus I'm writing Work I should be doing now Unemployment check Wife is upset now Kids have no shoes or clothing must write more guykus Suddenly single She took the car, house and dog must write more guykus Out the game too long prostitute the only choice I missed the blisters Sores are bleeding now Crust forms around urethra The worst, yet to come Homeless, no money Wife gone, life in shambles now just one more guyku Life ruined, love lost All because of gblowfish stupid guyku thread ==========================
Posts: 778

10-11-2007, 02:23 PM	#35
elvomito ☻☺ Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: ♠█♠ Casino cash: $10004900	wilas one oh one i will buy you an escort depression is bad
Posts: 2,362

10-11-2007, 02:44 PM	#36
Mark M What time is it? Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: You tell me ... Casino cash: $9884900	It's threads like these that keep me lurking (even if I don't post as often as I used to). Oh ... and I'll try to come up with some Guyku later. I pretty much suck at those things (too few words). MM ~~ __________________ ChiefsPlanet -- n. The place where brilliant minds assemble to willfully pool ignorance with questionable logic in order to reach absurd conclusions.
Posts: 4,687

10-11-2007, 02:50 PM	#37
Bob Dole King Shit of **** Mountain Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texarkana, Texas Casino cash: $-1204563	sex drugs rock and roll at least until the wedding then not so much sex
Posts: 51,574

10-11-2007, 02:52 PM	#38
Bob Dole King Shit of **** Mountain Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texarkana, Texas Casino cash: $-1204563	my mind wanders some I tend to have impure thoughts I accept the blame
Posts: 51,574

10-11-2007, 03:19 PM	#39
DaKCMan AP Beloved & Awesome CP Celebrity Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Florida Casino cash: $5624952	Stop calling me, bitch! I said that I loved you just To get in your pants __________________
Posts: 35,714

10-11-2007, 03:27 PM	#40
dogdaze Starter Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: GeographicallyUndesirable Casino cash: $10004900	bound by ball and chain the weight increases with time release me, sweet death.
Posts: 58

10-11-2007, 03:49 PM	#41
Braincase Banned Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Pond> Me <Barn Casino cash: $11298284	Oral Sex? I hope! I am worthy! Castle King! For I mowed the lawn. __________________ BrainCase
Posts: 15,429

10-11-2007, 04:17 PM	#42
gblowfish Be Kind To Your Pets Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Glorious Independence, MO Casino cash: $16896178 VARSITY	From my pal Mr. Doggity: Of course I love you I already said so once Now get me a beer Why do you ask me If that makes your ass look fat? I will plead the fifth Where's my foam finger And my two-beer sippy hat? It's football season Ask not who broke wind He who smelt it hath dealt it So it must be you Behold the fisherman The truth. It is not in him He smells of strong drink I envy my dog He pisses on neighbor's shrubs And humps his wife's leg From my pal Ramon T. Peligrosso: Oh! HGTV… It’s the Speed Channel for me When you’ve gone to bed Dreams of Ferrari On a cold drizzly Sunday Driving to Costco
Posts: 41,011

10-11-2007, 05:13 PM	#43
FAX testing ... 1, 2, 3 Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Tennessee Casino cash: $6753759	I hid all your bras In the basement yesterday Ha ha ha ha ha FAX
Posts: 44,492

10-11-2007, 06:07 PM	#45
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-542449 VARSITY	I know everything Why? Because I am a man Do not question me __________________ Active fan of the greatest team in NFL history.
Posts: 145,338