Chiefs LNBS: "Beast mode." **** you, Seattle - Page 4

**RealSNR** · 11-14-2014, 10:25 PM

I realize this is my "DOLPHIN WEARING A FOOTBALL HELMET" moment because I've posted about this a couple times, but it deserves to be brought up again this week.

Seattle has a really unintelligent fan base. And I don't mean in terms of football. It's clear they're not deficient in that area. I mean in terms of intelligence and creativity. They have none of those two things.

They've got a pretty good RB who runs hard. Good for them. They want to give him a nickname. Skittles is funny. But no, they want something TOUGH-sounding. What would do the trick? Here's what they came up with:

Beast Mode.

Is that from a video game? No, that's God Mode, which is far cooler, but it wouldn't be as accessible religious people, I suppose. Or a movie or something? Is that like what the Incredible Hulk is? It's not, is it? You just thought that would be a good name for him. I get that Lynch was unstoppable in that 7-9 year where he raped the Saints. That doesn't give you an excuse come up with a shitty fan name for him and then force everybody else to use it, too.

Your stupid fan base couldn't **** that up any harder if they tried to come up with a scary name for their defense.

OH WAIT THEY DID. Legion of Boom?

Did you know that Houston Rockets fans had a name for Chandler Parsons? They called him Chandler Bang, like Chandler Bing from Friends. Why? Because, uh... Bang... he's really good at sports? Or something. Like you know... Bang! The sound you get from firing your gun in the air because Parsons just made a 3-point shot!

Legion of Boom is worse than that. It's dumber than that. It's almost as dumb as Beast Mode.

I just hired the same 8-year old that comes up with crap for your players to give Chiefs players some names. Here's what he came up with:

Alex Smith: Iron Man
Jamaal Charles: Speed Demon
Dontari Poe: Great Wall of Pain
Eric Berry: Really Really Good Football Player
The Chiefs Defense: Joint Chiefs of Boom

Go fist a cow, Seattle.

Pablo · 11-14-2014, 11:36 PM

Seahawks are called that because they are hawks; which are birds that live around coastal areas. You'd know that if you studied ornithology. The Pacific Ocean is a sea. It is a very large body of water. You can google maps of the world if you want to know more.

Sorter · 11-14-2014, 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chiefs=Good

Im personally fond of 'The Land Breather'.

Dontari "The Hippo" Poe.

**Mav** · 11-14-2014, 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by irocdave

Yea, probably will but I'm Ok with that. This site is awesome and the people that post here are hilarious. Like any site, there is a thread of truth with most posts and the abuse I'm going to take is worth it.

You get it. You will do fine here.

Sorter · 11-14-2014, 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by irocdave

Yea, probably will but I'm Ok with that. This site is awesome and the people that post here are hilarious. Like any site, there is a thread of truth with most posts and the abuse I'm going to take is worth it.

WHERE IS THIS THREAD OF TRUTH?????!!!!

WHERE!!!!!!!!!!????????????

**Mav** · 11-14-2014, 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sorter

Dontari "The Hippo" Poe.

Its uncanny!

**TimBone** · 11-14-2014, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by irocdave

Wow. Not sure if I should try and answer your obvious reverse troll questions or just troll you. We Hawk fans didn't officially name Lynch's running style "beast mode", he did. Yea, it seems childish until you watch him run. He doesn't go down when hit or when a couple of 300+ pound lineman pile on his back. He keeps moving forward and stays upright until the O line can push the pile another 2 - 10 yards. Lynch also has a propensity to run over D lineman, linebackers, stiff arm D backs to the ground etc. Beastquake was legit. He ran over several Aints players and the fan reaction caused seismometer readings in the sludge under the HAwks stadium to register and earthquake. Ergo "beastquake".

Is reverse trolling like reverse racism?

Direckshun · 11-14-2014, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pablo

Seahawks are called that because they are hawks; which are birds that live around coastal areas. You'd know that if you studied ornithology. The Pacific Ocean is a sea. It is a very large body of water. You can google maps of the world if you want to know more.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait waitwaitwait WAIT.

The Seahawks is a FOOTBALL team of HUMANS that just CALL themselves birds?

OMG THEY NEED A THEME SONG

Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
The eagle's born out of thunder
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
He flies through the night
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Don't you mess with his eggs now
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Or you'll see him fight
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Yes, we have feathers
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
But the muscles of men
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
'Cause we're Birds of War, now
But we're also men!
Birds of War!

**TimBone** · 11-14-2014, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pablo

Truncated Cuboctahedron is a ****ing sick nickname. That's what we should start calling Houston.

Sorter · 11-14-2014, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pablo

Seahawks are called that because they are hawks; which are birds that live around coastal areas. You'd know that if you studied ornithology. The Pacific Ocean is a sea. It is a very large body of water. You can google maps of the world if you want to know more.

Well, that's stupid.

Why aren't they called "The Ospreys"?

Sorter · 11-14-2014, 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mav

Its uncanny!

They even have the same facial hair.

Sorter · 11-14-2014, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Direckshun

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait waitwaitwait WAIT.

The Seahawks is a FOOTBALL team of HUMANS that just CALL themselves birds?

OMG THEY NEED A THEME SONG

Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Stomp, clap. Stomp-stomp, clap.
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
The eagle's born out of thunder
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
He flies through the night
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Don't you mess with his eggs now
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Or you'll see him fight
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
Yes, we have feathers
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
But the muscles of men
Ahh-aa-aa-ahh
'Cause we're Birds of War, now
But we're also men!
Birds of War!

Birds can't stomp.

I don't know if Bird-Men hybrids can though.

**TimBone** · 11-14-2014, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

Name for Dontari Poe:

Mother****ing Coelacanth!

lol its funny because his head is shaped that way.

**Mav** · 11-14-2014, 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sorter

Birds can't stomp.

I don't know if Bird-Men hybrids can though.

You would think a penguin could.

Pablo · 11-14-2014, 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Direckshun

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait waitwaitwait WAIT.

The Seahawks is a FOOTBALL team of HUMANS that just CALL themselves birds?

I'm fairly certain they dress up as birds when they get home and **** their wives. Something about thicker shells on their eggs if they glue feathers to themselves and flap their wings while doing doggy-style.

**Mav** · 11-14-2014, 11:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pablo

I'm fairly certain they dress up as birds when they get home and **** their wives. Something about thicker shells on their eggs if they glue feathers to themselves and flap their wings while doing doggy-style.

Is it doggy style at that point? Winged style?

11-14-2014, 10:25 PM
RealSNR Special Teams ACE!!! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Where the hell is SNR Casino cash: $1810208	LNBS: "Beast mode." you, Seattle I realize this is my "DOLPHIN WEARING A FOOTBALL HELMET" moment because I've posted about this a couple times, but it deserves to be brought up again this week. Seattle has a really unintelligent fan base. And I don't mean in terms of football. It's clear they're not deficient in that area. I mean in terms of intelligence and creativity. They have none of those two things. They've got a pretty good RB who runs hard. Good for them. They want to give him a nickname. Skittles is funny. But no, they want something TOUGH-sounding. What would do the trick? Here's what they came up with: Beast Mode. Is that from a video game? No, that's God Mode, which is far cooler, but it wouldn't be as accessible religious people, I suppose. Or a movie or something? Is that like what the Incredible Hulk is? It's not, is it? You just thought that would be a good name for him. I get that Lynch was unstoppable in that 7-9 year where he raped the Saints. That doesn't give you an excuse come up with a shitty fan name for him and then force everybody else to use it, too. Your stupid fan base couldn't **** that up any harder if they tried to come up with a scary name for their defense. OH WAIT THEY DID. Legion of Boom? Did you know that Houston Rockets fans had a name for Chandler Parsons? They called him Chandler Bang, like Chandler Bing from Friends. Why? Because, uh... Bang... he's really good at sports? Or something. Like you know... Bang! The sound you get from firing your gun in the air because Parsons just made a 3-point shot! Legion of Boom is worse than that. It's dumber than that. It's almost as dumb as Beast Mode. I just hired the same 8-year old that comes up with crap for your players to give Chiefs players some names. Here's what he came up with: Alex Smith: Iron Man Jamaal Charles: Speed Demon Dontari Poe: Great Wall of Pain Eric Berry: Really Really Good Football Player The Chiefs Defense: Joint Chiefs of Boom Go fist a cow, Seattle.
Posts: 90,857

11-14-2014, 11:36 PM	#46
Pablo Ultrabanned Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: North da River Casino cash: $1469356	Seahawks are called that because they are hawks; which are birds that live around coastal areas. You'd know that if you studied ornithology. The Pacific Ocean is a sea. It is a very large body of water. You can google maps of the world if you want to know more.
Posts: 40,869