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Old 10-05-2019, 11:00 PM  
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****OFFICIAL Kansas City Chiefs vs. Indianapolis Colts Gameday THREAD****
Most National Football League football games are in the afternoon. But THIS game? Between the Kansas City Chiefs (my top favorite NFL team) and the Indianapolis Colts? Well, it's a little bit different. THIS game... is on Sunday NIGHT.

OHHHHHHHH SUNDAY NIGHT!!!!!

The Kansas City Chiefs are GUARANTEED to finish 19-0 this season. Therefore they are GUARANTEED to win TONIGHT'S GAME. And so here are NINE TEEN FACTS about the game !

1. Andrew Luck's sudden retirement made complete sense to anyone who was paying attention: who wouldn't want to get the hell out of Indianapolis???
2. HOWEVER, Luck later said that he would stay in Indianapolis, due to it being "home." And so his retirement made even more sense: his brain is all messed up!!!!
3. Former Kansas City Chiefs player Justin Houston will make his return to Arrowhead as an Indianapolis Colt!
4. Justin Houston will also be the first dead player to play in an NFL game... because he's DEAD TO ME!!!
5. Speaking of dead, our beloved KC Chiefs killed the Colts in last year's playoffs game!
6. That was the FIRST EVER meeting between the Chiefs and Colts in the playoffs! Wow, what are the odds?
7. Speaking of what are the odds, what are the odds that an opposing quarterback in KC would be named after BBQ... that's right, Jacoby Brisket!
8. Chris Jones will eat Jacoby Brisket tonight!
9. I mean that he will literally consume Jacoby Brisket's flesh!
10. He will slather Jacoby Brisket's flesh in Joe's Kansas City sauce! Yum!
11. Hm, who's the Kansas City Chiefs quarterback again???? Oh yeah.
12. PATRICK MAHOMES!!!!
13. Half of the Colts D is injured and the other half is about to be dismantled by PATRICK MAHOMES!!!!!
14. The current record for most touchdown passes in a single game is 7.
15. PATRICK MAHOMES will throw 7... TEEN touchdowns tonight!!!
16. The Colts coach is named Frank Reich. Ummmm... Nazi much???
17. Chiefs coach Andy Reid's name is not at ALL evocative of the Nazis!
18. Therefore the Chiefs are good and the Colts are evil!!!!
19. PATRICK MAHOMES MVP #1 BEST QB SHALL LEAD THE TEAM TO VICTORY!!!!

I AM INTENSELY SEXUALLY HORNY TO WATCH THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS PLAY THE SPORT OF FOOTBALL TONIGHT!!!!

THEY SHALL WIN THE NFL FOOTBALL GAME!!!!

YES!!!!!

Thank you.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #676
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How the hell, Pat?
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #677
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Originally Posted by JakeF View Post
Fine, then stop saying Kelce is an elite TE because he should catch those if he's that great.
Jesus Christ you're ****ing stupid
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #678
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #679
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #680
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #681
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Kelce whiffed on the block.
I was wondering if that was him. He's having a rough start to his evening.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #682
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Second quarter now. I guess it's okay to start scoring touchdowns.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #683
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4 straight without a 1st quarter TD, correct? Check my math?
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #684
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #685
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #686
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and Mahomes with another Houdini throw
Meanwhile Andy wants to run chickenshit reverse plays. You have the most talented QB ever. Use him. You don't need freaking trick plays with this guy.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #687
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:00 PM   #688
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Our saving grace is what they said on the tube -- the Colts are going to play a basic zone all night and Mahomes is going to carve them up no matter who is catching the ball.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:01 PM   #689
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Second quarter now. I guess it's okay to start scoring touchdowns.
Just have to get past the Andy Reid scripted plays. We should be in the clear now.
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Old 10-06-2019, 07:01 PM   #690
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Mahomes looks like a shortstop running towards 2nd base while throwing to 1st base.
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