Life I am learning empathy for the homeless - Page 9

Hydrae · 08-15-2024, 04:35 AM

I don't even know how to start. Right now, it looks like my wife and I may be homeless next month. I was laid off from my job after 9 and a half years because the company decided to change the structure of their gold standard support team. That was a wonderful Monday morning last October. At least the one other time I was laid off it was because they moved their support team to India. That was at least kind of understandable. They also gave me a month's severance pay for each year I had worked for them (6 years). This time I got 2 months of severance for my 9.5 years of service. Given my previous experience, that felt like an additional slap to the face.

In an attempt to keep our house, we have left it and leased it out to 2 of my children, a nephew, and a close friend of one of my sons. This is not a good time to try to sell and we were to the point where we weren't sure we could pay the mortgage. They are covering the mortgage plus about $1000. So technically we have some income and even own a house. That "income" is great, but it doesn't go very far and is far from covering the rent on the apartment we have rented. And without an income we can't even tap into the ~$250,000 of equity (monetary term, not social bullshit!). I suppose we could put it on the market but that would screw over the young people there now and I don't want to pass my trouble to the next generation.

I have worked in tech support for the entirety of this century and that is only 4 jobs. I have never been a job hopper obviously. Since I was laid off last October, I have sent out hundreds of resumes. In that time, I have gotten less than 20 initial interviews and maybe 6 actual interviews. I even made it through the entire process a couple of times but obviously nothing has panned out. I will be 64 in a couple of weeks, and I have to wonder if part of the issue has been a form of ageism. At this point in my life, I am not excited to grow in a career. I just want to do awesome work, go home, and retire in a few years. Corporate America wants people who are looking to advance and better themselves. Of course, in a year or two that new hire will move on to the next opportunity while I would still be there consistent as always (as seen by 4 jobs in over 20 years).

So we made the fateful decision to follow our dream. We had plans to move back "home" to Oregon this past spring. Losing my job put the kibosh on that. Well, in our attempt to keep the house until the Fed lowers interest rates and the housing market to heat back up a little, we have moved to Oregon. I have been working remote since before the pandemic so I should be able to work from anywhere. Of course, after the last 10 months finances are thin to be kind, so it was a bit of a leap of faith. We are here now on the Oregon coast, my wife has a part time job that she loves but doesn't pay much, and I am trying to find ANYTHING at this point. I thought I was going to get a retail job making a whopping $16.75 an hour (I was making $84k a year before the layoff) but got screwed up regarding the drug test and lost that opportunity. Sorry, I do not follow blind links in a text. They could have at least put a note in the text about what the link was for. Well, that was the order for me to go piss in a cup and it expired in 48 hours. I was under the impression that I was going to get an email and was waiting for them to finish a background check. This is considered the same as a failure, so I am out with no recourse. I do feel bad for the manager as she was desperate for someone and will likely have to cancel her vacation in a few weeks.

I know a lot of this is just rambling, but it is how messed up my head is right now. I can't sleep for more than an hour at a time. It is 3 AM as I type this. I have never had an issue with getting a job in my life and have never been out of work for more than a few weeks. Right now, not only do I not see a light at the end of the tunnel, there isn't even a sign of a train. It is just black, and I am stumbling along with no idea where I may be heading. This does lead me to saying thank you to Detox. I noted his signature line a couple days ago and sent him a rep because it buoyed me up. He responded with a wonderfully supportive note which, given my current emotional and mental state, made me cry. That was also the day before I learned that I had screwed up the potential job I had on the line.

So, as the thread title states, I better understand how some of the homeless came to be that way through no fault of their own. I can tell you, the depression and desperation that I am going through does just functioning on a daily basis very hard.

Sorry to dump on everyone's day. I had to try to get some of this crap out of my head. No replies necessary, I just thank Kyle for creating this wonderful community where I can vent. Now I am going to go cry again and maybe, hopefully, get some more sleep.

**ptlyon** · 08-16-2024, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sassy Squatch

Sometimes you just need some positivity with a dash of pragmatic advice to get back up and running. Glad things are looking up for you.

Or, to have someone say

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS 3-PEAT!!

Delano · 08-16-2024, 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by |Zach|

You of all people pretending to be on a pedestal. Simply amazing.

This schmo plot arc will finish with him publicly offering a couple hundred bucks to the OP.

To revisit the schmo script:

1. Be a fat, unlikeable ****.
2. Make completely unrelated threads about me. Even if the original thread is dealing with some very heavy topics.
3. Double or triple down because I’m an entitled boomer with zero ability to read a room.
4. Feel the bad PR and offer some money to quiet things down.

ThrobProng · 08-16-2024, 09:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

This schmo plot arc will finish with him publicly offering a couple hundred bucks to the OP.

To revisit the schmo script:

1. Be a fat, unlikeable ****.
2. Make completely unrelated threads about me. Even if the original thread is dealing with some very heavy topics.
3. Double or triple down because I’m an entitled boomer with zero ability to read a room.
4. Feel the bad PR and offer some money to quiet things down.

You forgot the ridiculously overpriced lunch and lot lizards.

stevieray · 08-16-2024, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scho63

Yeah, because when your 62 and you can't land a good job and pay your bills and telling everyone you are on the verge of homelessness, CP is the first place everyone should turn to.

This is sooooooo low rent. You're way out of line.

Hydrae is one of the coolest guys here.

He'll land on his feet. Guys like him always do.

WilliamTheIrish · 08-16-2024, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

This schmo plot arc will finish with him publicly offering a couple hundred bucks to the OP.

To revisit the schmo script:

1. Be a fat, unlikeable ****.
2. Make completely unrelated threads about me. Even if the original thread is dealing with some very heavy topics.
3. Double or triple down because I’m an entitled boomer with zero ability to read a room.
4. Feel the bad PR and offer some money to quiet things down.

"The schmo plot arc". That's hilarious.

Couple of things to add:

Icons

32 years in tech- hot wheels and LEGO then to AOL.

Expert in medical issues.

Forget the name of the guy to whom you gave the $ when his death is announced.

Pasta Little Brioni · 08-16-2024, 12:28 PM

Get that Fred Meyer job and show them what you can do!

Don't listen to scho. Yes your belly will be full of cheap pasta and cheaper hookers but then you just spent all your money on cheap pasta and cheaper hookers

BIG_DADDY · 08-16-2024, 01:01 PM

Fred Meyers is like a cult, you go in and stay forever. Their employee retention is pretty amazing. You would be surprised how many whole families work there. Mom, dad, kids, the whole works.
I haven't been to Newport in a long time. It will always hold a special place in my heart as that is where we spread my mother and father's ashes after they were gone. I don't think I could ever live there as it is just way too cloudy and cold a lot but I can see why you went there. Loved Rouge Brewing, Copper River salmon, the crab and seafood in general. I never got the big deal everyone made about Mo's. You still have that little asian grocers off HWY 20 just before you come into town? The little organic grocers by the recreation center. I used to always train there, get groceries and come back. The one bad thing I have to say is I don't think I have ever seen a place with more morbidly obese people. For those of you that have never been down the Oregon coast it's pretty amazing. From the rock formations to the Redwoods and hiking trails, pretty sweet.

Glad you are getting good news, sounds like you will be back on your feet soon.

Toadkiller · 08-16-2024, 01:12 PM

I got laid off in dec after 16 years at my job. They sent a lot of the IT work to India and the Philippines. It sucks, we are hurting but my wife has a job so that is good.
I see you are in Newport, quite a long way from Washougal but let me know what I can do to help you out.

**AustinChief** · 08-16-2024, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hydrae

Man, this place is so awesome! Thank you to everyone (even Otter, what the hell) for the kind words, advice, and simply support.

Today has been so much better of day than I have in a bit. First, this place. Also, the job that I thought I was out on is back on the table. I will know more on Monday. The Fred Meyer interview has been pushed to next Tuesday but that is okay. I will likely look to take both jobs with one of them being part time. That will get me back on my feet faster and I can get an idea of the environment and decide which is the longer term solution.

I will update this thread as my situation evolves but at least I think I see a light and I don't think it is a train. I am regaining faith that this will work out which is key to making that happen. To quote the old song, sometimes you have to go through hell to get to heaven.

**** yeah! Awesome news.

GloryDayz · 08-16-2024, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hydrae

Man, this place is so awesome! Thank you to everyone (even Otter, what the hell) for the kind words, advice, and simply support.

Today has been so much better of day than I have in a bit. First, this place. Also, the job that I thought I was out on is back on the table. I will know more on Monday. The Fred Meyer interview has been pushed to next Tuesday but that is okay. I will likely look to take both jobs with one of them being part time. That will get me back on my feet faster and I can get an idea of the environment and decide which is the longer term solution.

I will update this thread as my situation evolves but at least I think I see a light and I don't think it is a train. I am regaining faith that this will work out which is key to making that happen. To quote the old song, sometimes you have to go through hell to get to heaven.

OUTSTANDING!!! I'm happy for you and hope you get both jobs and grill up a nice thick steak with your bride to celebrate...

BryanBusby · 08-16-2024, 05:00 PM

A few things.

I've seen that you considered waiting to max payout SS range but reconsidered. Keep with that. My financial advisors have advised me to not make that move.

Some posters are just natural ****s. They always eventually simmer to the top.

If you try to get back into tech and need someone to look over your resume, you can always PM it to me. Now that I've done it long enough, I'd feel comfortable picking it apart and telling you why you're not getting call backs. Ageism is very real in IT but it shouldn't keep you from getting any interviews.

And good luck with the job interview.

Mosbonian · 08-16-2024, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BryanBusby

A few things.

Ageism is very real in all job categories....

Only changed one thing on your post....otherwise everything else is dead on!

GloryDayz · 08-16-2024, 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mosbonian

Only changed one thing on your post....otherwise everything else is dead on!

This is true.

DenverChief · 08-16-2024, 07:48 PM

Congrats! Don't give up on that link I sent you...there is a shortage there and the job security is primo.

Balto · 08-16-2024, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BryanBusby

A few things.

I've seen that you considered waiting to max payout SS range but reconsidered. Keep with that. My financial advisors have advised me to not make that move.

Some posters are just natural ****s. They always eventually simmer to the top.

If you try to get back into tech and need someone to look over your resume, you can always PM it to me. Now that I've done it long enough, I'd feel comfortable picking it apart and telling you why you're not getting call backs. Ageism is very real in IT but it shouldn't keep you from getting any interviews.

And good luck with the job interview.

Great advice but I’d disagree about taking SS early vs later. It’s very very person to person. Lots of factors like do you have retirement accounts? Will you be looking at large Required minimum distributions(RMDs) later in life, 73 atm.

If a persons everyday living expenses are satisfied by what SS pays even at 62 that could be a great reason to start taking distributions.

What about your spouses SS? What happens if one of you passes?

Just saying that starting SS at age 62 vs full age isn’t the same for every person and every situation.

08-15-2024, 04:35 AM
Hydrae MVP Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Newport, Or Casino cash: $-1163000	I am learning empathy for the homeless I don't even know how to start. Right now, it looks like my wife and I may be homeless next month. I was laid off from my job after 9 and a half years because the company decided to change the structure of their gold standard support team. That was a wonderful Monday morning last October. At least the one other time I was laid off it was because they moved their support team to India. That was at least kind of understandable. They also gave me a month's severance pay for each year I had worked for them (6 years). This time I got 2 months of severance for my 9.5 years of service. Given my previous experience, that felt like an additional slap to the face. In an attempt to keep our house, we have left it and leased it out to 2 of my children, a nephew, and a close friend of one of my sons. This is not a good time to try to sell and we were to the point where we weren't sure we could pay the mortgage. They are covering the mortgage plus about $1000. So technically we have some income and even own a house. That "income" is great, but it doesn't go very far and is far from covering the rent on the apartment we have rented. And without an income we can't even tap into the ~$250,000 of equity (monetary term, not social bullshit!). I suppose we could put it on the market but that would screw over the young people there now and I don't want to pass my trouble to the next generation. I have worked in tech support for the entirety of this century and that is only 4 jobs. I have never been a job hopper obviously. Since I was laid off last October, I have sent out hundreds of resumes. In that time, I have gotten less than 20 initial interviews and maybe 6 actual interviews. I even made it through the entire process a couple of times but obviously nothing has panned out. I will be 64 in a couple of weeks, and I have to wonder if part of the issue has been a form of ageism. At this point in my life, I am not excited to grow in a career. I just want to do awesome work, go home, and retire in a few years. Corporate America wants people who are looking to advance and better themselves. Of course, in a year or two that new hire will move on to the next opportunity while I would still be there consistent as always (as seen by 4 jobs in over 20 years). So we made the fateful decision to follow our dream. We had plans to move back "home" to Oregon this past spring. Losing my job put the kibosh on that. Well, in our attempt to keep the house until the Fed lowers interest rates and the housing market to heat back up a little, we have moved to Oregon. I have been working remote since before the pandemic so I should be able to work from anywhere. Of course, after the last 10 months finances are thin to be kind, so it was a bit of a leap of faith. We are here now on the Oregon coast, my wife has a part time job that she loves but doesn't pay much, and I am trying to find ANYTHING at this point. I thought I was going to get a retail job making a whopping $16.75 an hour (I was making $84k a year before the layoff) but got screwed up regarding the drug test and lost that opportunity. Sorry, I do not follow blind links in a text. They could have at least put a note in the text about what the link was for. Well, that was the order for me to go piss in a cup and it expired in 48 hours. I was under the impression that I was going to get an email and was waiting for them to finish a background check. This is considered the same as a failure, so I am out with no recourse. I do feel bad for the manager as she was desperate for someone and will likely have to cancel her vacation in a few weeks. I know a lot of this is just rambling, but it is how messed up my head is right now. I can't sleep for more than an hour at a time. It is 3 AM as I type this. I have never had an issue with getting a job in my life and have never been out of work for more than a few weeks. Right now, not only do I not see a light at the end of the tunnel, there isn't even a sign of a train. It is just black, and I am stumbling along with no idea where I may be heading. This does lead me to saying thank you to Detox. I noted his signature line a couple days ago and sent him a rep because it buoyed me up. He responded with a wonderfully supportive note which, given my current emotional and mental state, made me cry. That was also the day before I learned that I had screwed up the potential job I had on the line. So, as the thread title states, I better understand how some of the homeless came to be that way through no fault of their own. I can tell you, the depression and desperation that I am going through does just functioning on a daily basis very hard. Sorry to dump on everyone's day. I had to try to get some of this crap out of my head. No replies necessary, I just thank Kyle for creating this wonderful community where I can vent. Now I am going to go cry again and maybe, hopefully, get some more sleep.
Posts: 14,858	8 0

08-16-2024, 12:28 PM	#126
Pasta Little Brioni Consuming CP souls Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: U.S.A. Casino cash: $198880	Get that Fred Meyer job and show them what you can do! Don't listen to scho. Yes your belly will be full of cheap pasta and cheaper hookers but then you just spent all your money on cheap pasta and cheaper hookers __________________ **Official TFWdemB Trivia Commisioner**
Posts: 72,998	1 0

08-16-2024, 01:01 PM	#127
BIG_DADDY THE RED MENACE Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texas Casino cash: $2558410	Fred Meyers is like a cult, you go in and stay forever. Their employee retention is pretty amazing. You would be surprised how many whole families work there. Mom, dad, kids, the whole works. I haven't been to Newport in a long time. It will always hold a special place in my heart as that is where we spread my mother and father's ashes after they were gone. I don't think I could ever live there as it is just way too cloudy and cold a lot but I can see why you went there. Loved Rouge Brewing, Copper River salmon, the crab and seafood in general. I never got the big deal everyone made about Mo's. You still have that little asian grocers off HWY 20 just before you come into town? The little organic grocers by the recreation center. I used to always train there, get groceries and come back. The one bad thing I have to say is I don't think I have ever seen a place with more morbidly obese people. For those of you that have never been down the Oregon coast it's pretty amazing. From the rock formations to the Redwoods and hiking trails, pretty sweet. Glad you are getting good news, sounds like you will be back on your feet soon. __________________ The diabolical genius of Marxism-Socialism is that it provides the emotional and intellectual road map for autocrats to persuade millions of people to support their own enslavement to government. ~Mark Levin April 15, 2019
Posts: 32,522	3 0

08-16-2024, 01:12 PM	#128
Toadkiller Garlic make my feet stank! Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Washougal, WA Casino cash: $4504921	I got laid off in dec after 16 years at my job. They sent a lot of the IT work to India and the Philippines. It sucks, we are hurting but my wife has a job so that is good. I see you are in Newport, quite a long way from Washougal but let me know what I can do to help you out.
Posts: 2,049	1 0

08-16-2024, 05:00 PM	#131
BryanBusby In Search of a Life Join Date: Mar 2006 Casino cash: $3169900 VARSITY	A few things. I've seen that you considered waiting to max payout SS range but reconsidered. Keep with that. My financial advisors have advised me to not make that move. Some posters are just natural ***s. They always eventually simmer to the top. If you try to get back into tech and need someone to look over your resume, you can always PM it to me. Now that I've done it long enough, I'd feel comfortable picking it apart and telling you why you're not getting call backs. Ageism is very real in IT but it shouldn't keep you from getting any* interviews. And good luck with the job interview.
Posts: 22,634	5 0

08-16-2024, 07:48 PM	#134
DenverChief Pedantic Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Rocky Ford Casino cash: $3072617	Congrats! Don't give up on that link I sent you...there is a shortage there and the job security is primo.
Posts: 17,051	3 0