Close call this morning

[Dante84]

My girl's roomie is out of town and her great dane got violently ill yesterday... just destroyed their carpeting. I guess her mom took the initiative to call a cleaning company to come out this morning, and didn't tell my gf until 7am today that the company would be there at 8.


Well, she calls me at 8:15 and wakes me up. Tells me that she let the guy in and that while he was upstairs, she decided to clean the wood floor in their kitchen. She was on all 4, scrubbing the floor, and she hears him right behind her say, "mmm... You sure are pretty" in a creepy ass voice. She immediately went outside and called me, asking if I would come over until he leaves.

I was ready to kill, man. Threw on shorts and a tshirt, grabbed my 9 iron, and sped over to her place.

I park, and this dude is a sweaty guy in his 50's with a weird, bent pigeon leg. He's in the driveway turning on his power vac. I walk right by him into the house with the club over my shoulder, and he looks really confused.

I sit on the couch in the entry way, holding my club, and 5 mins later he walks in, says, "hi," to which I don't respond.

He goes in the kitchen and says to my girl, "is that club for me?!"

She says "he's going to the range in a bit" at the same time I say "maybe"

He starts to ask her another question and I let him know that is done speaking with her, and to finish cleaning the carpet and leave.

Son of a bitch shuts his mouth, hops the **** to, and leaves the second he's done.

I haven't been that heated in years.