Missouri Wal Mart Deodorant Licker Apprehended!

[gblowfish]

https://www.aol.com/article/news/202...ifFLIGW6N0Z29w

A man who police accused of licking items in a Missouri Walmart has been charged with making a terrorist threat.

Cody Lee Pfister, 26, was charged by the Warren County Prosecuting Attorney's Office with making the threat after police said he made a video of himself licking items in a Walmart store.

A video posted to social media shows a man saying to the camera: "Who's scared of the coronavirus? Don't touch your mouth" before licking a row of items on the store shelf.

A statement from the City of Warrenton Police Department on Monday said that "a local resident who took a video of themselves licking the merchandise after making a 'Corona Virus' statement at Walmart and posting it to social media has been taken into custody."

Pfister was then charged by the Warren County Prosecuting Attorney's Office with a terrorist threat in the second degree, The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported.

In Missouri, making a terrorist threat in the second degree means ignoring the risk of "causing the evacuation, quarantine or closure of any portion of a building" and is a class E felony, which means it can be met with a prison sentence of up to four years and a fine.

A hearing is scheduled for Wednesday, according to the Post-Dispatch.

The Warrenton Police Department said on Facebook that people around the world had been in touch to complain about the video. The department said it "received numerous reports about the video from locals, nearby residents, as well as people from the Netherlands, Ireland, and the United Kingdom."

"We take these complaints very seriously and would like to thank all of those who reported the video so the issue could be addressed."

Pfister's attorney did not respond to a message from the Post-Dispatch as of Tuesday. According to the Post-Dispatch, he has previously pleaded guilty to charges including burglary and stealing a firearm.

The US Centers for Disease Control has warned that the coronavirus could stay on various surfaces for hours or days, meaning that people could become infected from touching an item that someone infected has touched.

The CDC says that "a person can get COVID-19 by touching a surface or object that has the virus on it and then touching their own mouth."

[Rasputin]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I see the previous arrests of Cody Lee Pfister for burgarly and stealing a firearm, and I suddenly had an epiphany.

We should make the death penalty cumulative. Even if you don't murder a bunch of people, you can still be put to death if you lead a life of constantly being problematic to society.

Maybe something like this.

1. 1,000 lifetime penalty points gets you the death penalty.
2. We have a table of penalty points that is public. Something like this.

1,000 points - 1st degree murder
500 points - Burglary
500 points - Armed robbery
250 points - Licking stuff in Wal Mart during a pandemic
200 points - DUI
100 points - Assault
50 points - Hit and Run
25 points - Shoplifting
10 points - Throwing stuff onto the field at a football game
5 points - More than 15 items in an express lane
1 point - Squeezing the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.

3. You hit 1,000, you get taken out back and shot.

It's a good system because we all know that there are petty criminals out there who do no good to society, but they also don't do the really bad stuff to get themselves offed. This will force them to straighten up and fly right at some point, or they're going to get executed for stealing a Snickers Bar.

You've opened up a whole plethora of possibilities. I've always thought that you should carry a gun that shoots suction flags to peoples cars that say "stupid" like if someone cuts you off you shoot that car and the flag says "stupid" If you get three flags a cop can pull you over and arrest you.

[smithandrew051]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

250 if you didn't trade up within the top 10, 950 if you did.

So a GM who trades up and passes on Mahomes and then proceeds to go into a downward spiral, which results in a DUI, will be put to death? Probably fitting

[Bob Dole]

Originally Posted by Rasputin

You've opened up a whole plethora of possibilities. I've always thought that you should carry a gun that shoots suction flags to peoples cars that say "stupid" like if someone cuts you off you shoot that car and the flag says "stupid" If you get three flags a cop can pull you over and arrest you.

Great idea, Gallagher.

[bdj23]

reeruns who do this shit for internet "clout" should be summarily executed.

[Kman34]

Originally Posted by Detoxing

****in' white trash people.

FYP..

[wazu]

Originally Posted by Bob Dole

Great idea, Gallagher.

Ha! Good catch.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by smithandrew051

So a GM who trades up and passes on Mahomes and then proceeds to go into a downward spiral, which results in a DUI, will be put to death? Probably fitting

He knew the rules.

[Bump]

I heard about this a week or two ago. Twatter reeruns with some #coronaviruschallenge where they go licking shit, trying to get it and then once they get it, continue to go out licking shit and trying to spread it. Really ****ed up people out there and **** twitter challenges, maybe they should start a #jumpoffacliffchallenge. Anything with the word challenge in it, they'll ****ing do it.

[Megatron96]

Originally Posted by KurtCobain

Well, I'm dead.

Shocker.

[OrtonsPiercedTaint]

I'm more concerned about the dogs. I see people pack in.

[Iowanian]

That's pretty gross but those dildos that were opening icecream and licking the top and putting it back last year needed to be fed to the hogs on national tv.

[ChiTown]

I'd be more entertained and impressed if he would have filmed himself swallowing a live grenade.

[Frazod]

We really need to bring back public flogging and the stock.

[frozenchief]

Originally Posted by Frazod

We really need to bring back public flogging and the stock.

This is a serious question, maybe the subject of a poll for someone who could figure out how to post one.

Assume you are convicted of a crime that requires some jail time: theft of a certain value; DUI; low-level assault, whatever. Which would you rather have:

30 days in jail, or

5 lashes with a cane like they do in Singapore?

I think I might do the lashes and just get it done with. Jails are pretty awful places and they are mind-numbingly boring.

[Frazod]

Originally Posted by frozenchief

This is a serious question, maybe the subject of a poll for someone who could figure out how to post one.

Assume you are convicted of a crime that requires some jail time: theft of a certain value; DUI; low-level assault, whatever. Which would you rather have:

30 days in jail, or

5 lashes with a cane like they do in Singapore?

I think I might do the lashes and just get it done with. Jails are pretty awful places and they are mind-numbingly boring.

I'd take the lashes. **** jail.