Chiefs to hire Matt House as LB coach [no, really - they actually are this time]

[RealSNR]

Source: the Chiefs are expected to hire University of Kentucky defensive coordinator Matt House as their linebackers coach.

— Field Yates (@FieldYates) February 8, 2019

Holy shit. I actually thought we should just straight up hire this guy as DC. He was on my list of top 3 candidates. We got him as LB coach?

****ing homerun hire if it comes to pass

[RealSNR]

Originally Posted by chiefzilla1501

Cats fans owe terez paylor a huge apology. They've been calling him a hack and a sore loser for a few days. He was reporting the truth.

THEY COULDN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Originally Posted by SAUTO

That post made no sense.

You say they will NEVER AGAIN release a top tier player over legal issues and you will bet that in one post

Then you say I would lose if they release a player over legal issues... while changing the bet to while Reid is here(you just change terms and sides midstream?) And also say I win if we release a player over legal issues in the next post.


I'm really confused

I guess you are, so maybe I'd better walk you through the King's English so that you can understand very specifically what is being said. Let's look at the original post:

( exhibit A )

Originally Posted by Sweet Daddy Hate

I guarantee you that Andy Reid and Clark Hunt will never again release premium talent from this team based on legal issues, murder or rape being the only exceptions.

In the above post, you are being guaranteed that the duo/partnership of A.Reid/C.Hunt will now and forevermore keep every talented player of the top shelf variety such as Tyreek Hill or Travis Kelce on this roster UNLESS one of the two following legal charges were to take place:


1) Any charge of rape.

2) Any charge of murder.( We should probably include Manslaughter in this term as well since it honors the spirit of the bet, but I'll leave that up to you )


So to make it simple, it breaks down like this:

1) The Chiefs draft/acquire/currently possess super stud player.

2) Super stud player is accused of full-on Ray Rice knockout of a female.

3) Video surfaces of super stud player performing above-stated action.

4) Chiefs may take any and all actions against said player EXCEPT an outright release ala Kareem Hunt.

Got it?

The other clauses presented after "exhibit A" in the successive post are there only to provide examples of the "spirit of the bet", and should be agreed upon by both parties to assure a reasonable and equitable wager.

In other words; no ticky-tack bullshit regarding legalities, and the player in question should be considered by this forum as an undisputed asset.


I can't make it any clearer than this.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

It should go without saying that the Chiefs are free to trade a player under normal circumstances or release a player based on age/performance issues.

[TwistedChief]

Originally Posted by Sweet Daddy Hate

I guess you are, so maybe I'd better walk you through the King's English so that you can understand very specifically what is being said. Let's look at the original post:

( exhibit A )



In the above post, you are being guaranteed that the duo/partnership of A.Reid/C.Hunt will now and forevermore keep every talented player of the top shelf variety such as Tyreek Hill or Travis Kelce on this roster UNLESS one of the two following legal charges were to take place:


1) Any charge of rape.

2) Any charge of murder.( We should probably include Manslaughter in this term as well since it honors the spirit of the bet, but I'll leave that up to you )


So to make it simple, it breaks down like this:

1) The Chiefs draft/acquire/currently possess super stud player.

2) Super stud player is accused of full-on Ray Rice knockout of a female.

3) Video surfaces of super stud player performing above-stated action.

4) Chiefs may take any and all actions against said player EXCEPT an outright release ala Kareem Hunt.

Got it?

The other clauses presented after "exhibit A" in the successive post are there only to provide examples of the "spirit of the bet", and should be agreed upon by both parties to assure a reasonable and equitable wager.

In other words; no ticky-tack bullshit regarding legalities, and the player in question should be considered by this forum as an undisputed asset.


I can't make it any clearer than this.

A real life Johnny Cochran our hands here.

Just a question: if the timeline of your standard of proof is "never again," when do you feel you'll be able to collect on this bet?

In contrast, SAUTO seems like he'll be able to collect the second the Chiefs release any player for any behavior aside from murder or rape.

For you to win, the Chiefs will have to keep every single player accused of anything short of murder or rape...for eternity. Or in my estimation, until Clark Hunt is no longer owner of the Chiefs.

SDH, I know you purported to be unable to make this any clearer to the esteemed ladies and gentlemen of the jury, but we collectively ask that you try harder.

[RealSNR]

Bunch of ****ing Eeyores near the beginning of this thread.

"Oh he's not coming? This always happens to us. Same ol' Chiefs..."

Yeah? Well I never lost faith! Rams Fan waltzed in here doing his bullshit "yay Wildcats" routine and I told him to go **** off! I knew we'd get House here eventually! Suck my dick!

Originally Posted by RealSNR

It ain't over until the fat lady with the blue checkmark tweets it.

Originally Posted by RealSNR

Matt Jones is a loser without a checkmark, guys.

You know who has a checkmark next to his name? Seth ****ing Keyser. And who the **** is that? A DUDE WITH A LAPTOP AND TOO MUCH TIME TO MAKE GIFS AND WATCH FOOTBALL.

May as well post a tweet from fake eDave!

[Skyy God]

Never bet against the House (or a Sicilian).

[GloryDayz]

Originally Posted by Cave Johnson

Never bet against the House (or a Sicilian).

Never bet against a Sicilian? Have Palermo or Catania ever won a title? Pffffffft!

[Skyy God]

Originally Posted by RealSNR

Bunch of ****ing Eeyores near the beginning of this thread.

"Oh he's not coming? This always happens to us. Same ol' Chiefs..."

Yeah? Well I never lost faith! Rams Fan waltzed in here doing his bullshit "yay Wildcats" routine and I told him to go **** off! I knew we'd get House here eventually! Suck my dick!

That’s the spirit.

Haters gonna hate.

[Skyy God]

Originally Posted by GloryDayz

Never bet against a Sicilian? Have Palermo or Catania ever won a title? Pffffffft!

I’m paraphrasing Princess Bride, gramps.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Originally Posted by RealSNR

Bunch of ****ing Eeyores near the beginning of this thread.

"Oh he's not coming? This always happens to us. Same ol' Chiefs..."

Yeah? Well I never lost faith! Rams Fan waltzed in here doing his bullshit "yay Wildcats" routine and I told him to go **** off! I knew we'd get House here eventually! Suck my dick!

That you did! I'm sure you have your own reasons as I have mine, but I don't recall any other posters stating as fact that we were going to do this come hell or high water. I could however be mistaken and I encourage all who did so to step forward and be counted!

( and re-post your initial assessment for the legally-challenged, please. )

[SAUTO]

1st off you should probably re read your "kings English" and see where you ****ed up.

Then i'm going to ask why we are talking about releasing player over legal issues anyway? Kareem Hunt was released because he lied to the team. Otherwise he'd still be here.

[GloryDayz]

Originally Posted by Cosmos

What hire ??

Glory Dayz is easily impressed...

[Tribal Warfare]

Originally Posted by RealSNR

Bunch of ****ing Eeyores near the beginning of this thread.

"Oh he's not coming? This always happens to us. Same ol' Chiefs..."

Yeah? Well I never lost faith! Rams Fan waltzed in here doing his bullshit "yay Wildcats" routine and I told him to go **** off! I knew we'd get House here eventually! Suck my dick!

Honestly, my reaction was " shit happens who's next on the list"

[Frosty]

The thread title has been quite the rollercoaster..

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

This is starting to remind me of the old days when Hamas used to have to bust out the "e-crayons" to explain shit to SAUTO.

Originally Posted by TwistedChief

A real life Johnny Cochran our hands here.

Just a question: if the timeline of your standard of proof is "never again," when do you feel you'll be able to collect on this bet?

Jesus tapdancing Christ; is Andy Reid going to coach the Chiefs after retirement, resigning, or from the great beyond?

A: When the partnership is dissolved, dipshit. Hence the phrase "long-term bet".

In contrast, SAUTO seems like he'll be able to collect the second the Chiefs release any player for any behavior aside from CHARGES OF murder or rape.

For you to win, the Chiefs will have to keep every single player accused of anything short of murder or rape...for eternity. Or in my estimation, until Clark Hunt is no longer owner of the Chiefs.

No, no, no, no, no, no, and NO.



"In contrast", it appears that your ability to understand rudimentary conversations in the English language lies somewhere between, "refugee off the boat" and "amoeba".

SDH, I know you purported to be unable to make this any clearer to the esteemed ladies and gentlemen of the jury, but we collectively ask that you try harder.

I've got one last e-crayon for you. The color is burnt orange. Why? Because it's a shitty color that no one likes and the only one I am going to waste on you:


In the normal course of events, the Chiefs are free to trade, acquire, and release any player they choose. But if one of their A+ players gets in a legal tussle, they may not outright release him for no compensation unless he has been charged with murder or rape.
They may release or trade said player ONLY when his current contract expires, or the player leaves at seasons end because they have made it clear that they will not re-sign or pick up an option.