Funny Stuff Pro vs Con on Country Living - Page 8

Holladay · 07:06 PM

Or "Why I should Live in the Big City"

Reading about the murder in St. Louis thread got me thinking. Why is good and bad to living out in the country.

Definition of "Out in the Country" is distance to buying stuff. I would say 45 miles. The ideal spot would be on 10-20 acres just outside of town. Those are cool CHEATERS. I am talking about out in the boonies.

Sorry about the format. I couldn't think of a better way

Pros:

Privacy is the biggest one.
I can go get the mail in my scuvvies.
Boff the wife on the trampoline.
No noisey neighbors including lawnmowers.
The closest neighbor in 1/2 mile away.
You know everybody.
Have a clay pigeon thrower in the back yard.
Can have multiple BIG dogs.
Dogs don't have to have fences. It's dog heaven. (when I whistle, it might take them 10 min to come because they were a mile away.
Get to have a big toys: big lawn mower, small tractor with all the implements.
Can have a big garden.
Can have a nice big green lawn to play football with the kids.
No neighborhood restrictions and guidelines.
Can play my guitar REALLY loud (if I had a guitar).
Get to sit in the back yard watching the sun go down over the valley with no noise at all except for those darn birds.
Can see vividly the Milky Way.
Can pee anywhere I want (fertilization).
Can plant a tree anywhere.
Get to have a 4 wheel drive vehicle for the snow.
Have a lot of space to do anything, like storing multiple vehicles.
Barns are cool.
Kids can play AirSoft gun fighting in the hay loft (except at night when they come in and ask where are the candles?)
No traffic, I live 15 miles from work and have only one stop sign and see 10 cars.
Property taxes are relatively cheap.
Have well water, thus no crap in the water to filter for my fish tanks...and don't have to pay a water bill.
I water my lawn for free!
Family and friends don't just stop by, they arrange a good time.
No City tax.
I don't have to lock my door (I don't know where the key is)
The BIG dogs keep the burglars away (Beware of Dog sign helps too. I added an "S")
Can own a bunch of guns and use them all.

Cons:

Isolation is the biggest one.
If I need a wiget to work on the house, it takes 2 hrs round trip to Home Depot.
When you DO go to town it takes all day, not only the drive, but you have to load up on everything because you don't want to go back soon.
Everybody knows you.
Big toys are expensive.
Mowing 2 acres sucks, weedeating is a real pain.
Kids can't hop on their bikes to visit a friend, you have to taxi them everywhere.
Gas is expensive.
Vehicles are expensive including the insurance for multiple vehicles (which you have because you have the space to store them)
If you have had a few, it is a loonnnggg way to walk since there is no corner bar.
I can't water my lawn because the well gives out.
Friends just don't swing by.
Finding a decent job can be hard.
Big gardens suck, weeding them and watering them all the time.
Big yards suck, if you fertilize well, your second home is the lawnmower seat and it better be a big expensive one.
Grass seed is expensive, I have to keep over seeding because my grass dies due to no water.
Up keep and maintenance is a lot of work (something always breaks) and expensive.
Guns suck. If you have a big place, people what to come over and shoot pigeons. They use all your guns and you have to clean them and pay for the shells.
Internet sucks...I have 3 different providers and none work at the same time.

That is about all off the top of my head. Please add more.

**Rain Man** · 05-27-2016, 12:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LoneWolf

You know how I know you're gay? You didn't bold the line about boffing the wife on the trampoline.

Maybe he's worried about harmonic convergence spiraling them out of control.

Otter · 05-27-2016, 02:14 AM

When I was in my 20s and fresh out of college I could have done NYC or anywhere with hot women all around and if you've never been to NYC or LA in your 20s it's pretty amazing. I think once you get married and want to settle down it's kinda neat to be in the middle of nowhere. Wouldn't trade it for much else but I was also raised a mountain man and so was my wife. It's all about preference.

threebag · 05-27-2016, 03:04 AM

Green Acres is the place for me....

Hoopsdoc · 05-27-2016, 05:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Oh, good point, hoopsdoc. Emergency care is a big advantage of being urban, and I personally would value that over being able to urinate freely in my yard.

Yeah, I have 4 kids so, I think about it a lot. Thank the good Lord, it hasn't happened yet.

Oh, and urinating freely and boffing the wife on the trampoline is worth a lot to me.

Red Dawg · 05-27-2016, 06:52 AM

So basicly according Chiefsplanet the big reasons to live in the country is because you can shoot guns and urinate all over the place outside and nobody cares.

Wow. Real good reasons.

Holladay · 05-27-2016, 07:05 AM

If you are younger, the city. If you are older, the peace and quiet (boffing the wife) has some merit. I don't need the traffic or all the entertainment, watching the kittens go fruit loops or the dogs go haywire, gives me the giggles more then a "festival" would.

IT IS CALLED "SLOWING DOWN". If you are ADHD, the country is not for you. Younger folks surely would not want that life style. Not much of a party out here, unless you wanna hunt.

And shooting guns in the backyard, peeing has its' merits as well. I think the peeing is a guy thing thou. My daughter did learn the "forest seat", she was 4 yrs old, squatted, pulled her shorts to the side, and peed next to the tree. That picture will stay with me the rest of my life.

WilliamTheIrish · 05-27-2016, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Can have multiple BIG dogs.
Dogs don't have to have fences. It's dog heaven. (when I whistle, it might take them 10 min to come because they were a mile

Multiple big dogs that run free? Uh-huh, riiiit.

You try that around herd(s) of cattle. Or somebody's chickens. You'll have multiple dogs that are laying on the side of the road.

**Rausch** · 05-27-2016, 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuckdaddy

So basicly according Chiefsplanet the big reasons to live in the country is because you can shoot guns and urinate all over the place outside and nobody cares.

Wow. Real good reasons.

One good reason I can think of is food.

More and more people I work with are going back to being responsible for more of what goes on the dinner table. People raising chickens, having small (sometimes large) gardens, planting fruit trees, etc.

I would love to have a small garden but it's just not possible where I live...

ThaVirus · 05-27-2016, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Otter

I was also raised a mountain man and so was my wife.

NTTAWWT

Frosty · 05-27-2016, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WilliamTheIrish

Multiple big dogs that run free? Uh-huh, riiiit.

You try that around herd(s) of cattle. Or somebody's chickens. You'll have multiple dogs that are laying on the side of the road.

People thinking it's okay to let their dogs run free is one of the things that sucks about living in a rural area.

WilliamTheIrish · 05-27-2016, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frosty

People thinking it's okay to let their dogs run free is one of the things that sucks about living in a rural area.

That's because the guy that posted that is one of the bigger idiots roaming the earth.

Red Dawg · 05-27-2016, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holladay

If you are younger, the city. If you are older, the peace and quiet (boffing the wife) has some merit. I don't need the traffic or all the entertainment, watching the kittens go fruit loops or the dogs go haywire, gives me the giggles more then a "festival" would.

IT IS CALLED "SLOWING DOWN". If you are ADHD, the country is not for you. Younger folks surely would not want that life style. Not much of a party out here, unless you wanna hunt.

And shooting guns in the backyard, peeing has its' merits as well. I think the peeing is a guy thing thou. My daughter did learn the "forest seat", she was 4 yrs old, squatted, pulled her shorts to the side, and peed next to the tree. That picture will stay with me the rest of my life.

Back yard peeing has it's merits? LOL that is some backwards country bullshit if I ever heard it.

**Rain Man** · 05-27-2016, 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

NTTAWWT

It was brave of him to share that. Bravo.

**Perineum Ripper** · 05-27-2016, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuckdaddy

Back yard peeing has it's merits? LOL that is some backwards country bullshit if I ever heard it.

If you are outside on a nice night enjoying a beer and you have to piss it's easier to stand up and walk over to a bush and piss than it is to walk inside take your shoes off then piss

So yeah it does have its merits..for someone who has a military picture up I would have thought you might have hadto piss outside before instead of walking to a porta john..unless you're Air Force then I understand

**DaneMcCloud** · 05-27-2016, 11:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by notorious

Very few pop-ins.

Big bonus

A gated entry takes care of that as well

05-25-2016, 04:47 PM
Holladay Veteran Join Date: Sep 2000 Casino cash: $2409480	Pro vs Con on Country Living Or "Why I should Live in the Big City" Reading about the murder in St. Louis thread got me thinking. Why is good and bad to living out in the country. Definition of "Out in the Country" is distance to buying stuff. I would say 45 miles. The ideal spot would be on 10-20 acres just outside of town. Those are cool CHEATERS. I am talking about out in the boonies. Sorry about the format. I couldn't think of a better way Pros: Privacy is the biggest one. I can go get the mail in my scuvvies. Boff the wife on the trampoline. No noisey neighbors including lawnmowers. The closest neighbor in 1/2 mile away. You know everybody. Have a clay pigeon thrower in the back yard. Can have multiple BIG dogs. Dogs don't have to have fences. It's dog heaven. (when I whistle, it might take them 10 min to come because they were a mile away. Get to have a big toys: big lawn mower, small tractor with all the implements. Can have a big garden. Can have a nice big green lawn to play football with the kids. No neighborhood restrictions and guidelines. Can play my guitar REALLY loud (if I had a guitar). Get to sit in the back yard watching the sun go down over the valley with no noise at all except for those darn birds. Can see vividly the Milky Way. Can pee anywhere I want (fertilization). Can plant a tree anywhere. Get to have a 4 wheel drive vehicle for the snow. Have a lot of space to do anything, like storing multiple vehicles. Barns are cool. Kids can play AirSoft gun fighting in the hay loft (except at night when they come in and ask where are the candles?) No traffic, I live 15 miles from work and have only one stop sign and see 10 cars. Property taxes are relatively cheap. Have well water, thus no crap in the water to filter for my fish tanks...and don't have to pay a water bill. I water my lawn for free! Family and friends don't just stop by, they arrange a good time. No City tax. I don't have to lock my door (I don't know where the key is) The BIG dogs keep the burglars away (Beware of Dog sign helps too. I added an "S") Can own a bunch of guns and use them all. Cons: Isolation is the biggest one. If I need a wiget to work on the house, it takes 2 hrs round trip to Home Depot. When you DO go to town it takes all day, not only the drive, but you have to load up on everything because you don't want to go back soon. Everybody knows you. Big toys are expensive. Mowing 2 acres sucks, weedeating is a real pain. Kids can't hop on their bikes to visit a friend, you have to taxi them everywhere. Gas is expensive. Vehicles are expensive including the insurance for multiple vehicles (which you have because you have the space to store them) If you have had a few, it is a loonnnggg way to walk since there is no corner bar. I can't water my lawn because the well gives out. Friends just don't swing by. Finding a decent job can be hard. Big gardens suck, weeding them and watering them all the time. Big yards suck, if you fertilize well, your second home is the lawnmower seat and it better be a big expensive one. Grass seed is expensive, I have to keep over seeding because my grass dies due to no water. Up keep and maintenance is a lot of work (something always breaks) and expensive. Guns suck. If you have a big place, people what to come over and shoot pigeons. They use all your guns and you have to clean them and pay for the shells. Internet sucks...I have 3 different providers and none work at the same time. That is about all off the top of my head. Please add more. Last edited by Holladay; 07-07-2016 at 07:06 PM..
Posts: 3,600

05-27-2016, 03:04 AM	#108
threebag Snacks Are Under My Apron Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Edge Casino cash: $2811660	Green Acres is the place for me.... __________________ Free DeBerg HayWire Greatest Almost Mod Ever In big nasty kcnut we trust
Posts: 23,913

05-27-2016, 06:52 AM	#110
Red Dawg Going home eventually Join Date: Dec 2002 Casino cash: $4562858	So basicly according Chiefsplanet the big reasons to live in the country is because you can shoot guns and urinate all over the place outside and nobody cares. Wow. Real good reasons. __________________ If you're not first you're last!
Posts: 30,472

05-27-2016, 07:05 AM	#111
Holladay Veteran Join Date: Sep 2000 Casino cash: $2409480	If you are younger, the city. If you are older, the peace and quiet (boffing the wife) has some merit. I don't need the traffic or all the entertainment, watching the kittens go fruit loops or the dogs go haywire, gives me the giggles more then a "festival" would. IT IS CALLED "SLOWING DOWN". If you are ADHD, the country is not for you. Younger folks surely would not want that life style. Not much of a party out here, unless you wanna hunt. And shooting guns in the backyard, peeing has its' merits as well. I think the peeing is a guy thing thou. My daughter did learn the "forest seat", she was 4 yrs old, squatted, pulled her shorts to the side, and peed next to the tree. That picture will stay with me the rest of my life.
Posts: 3,600