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Old 03-16-2007, 09:20 PM  
sedated sedated is offline
Like I woke up in Wonderland..
 
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So glad to be home...

I'm the luckiest mother fucker on earth.

Been drinking since noon, mostly rebull-vodka, went to a buddies to watch KU game.

Driving home, realized on the highway that I got a headlight out, but have day-time-running lights that should cover me (right?)

Wrong. right before I turn into my apartment complex, a cop pulls behind me and puts on the lights. (I shove the container full of controband into my boxers)

"did you know you have a headlight out?"

"um..uh...I just...I known since the highway, was going to fix it tomorrow."

"Can I see ID and proof of insurance?"

I can't find my wallet in my pocket, so figure it must be in my little cooler pull of beer and whiskey. So, while he's shining his flashlight in my face, I reach in, clang around the empty beer bottles and find nothing. It's on the seat next to me.

"how much have you had to drink tonight?"

"um...hardly...n-n-nothing at all."

"where you coming from?"

"um...uh...watching the game at a friend's house." He takes ID and goes back to his car.

Meanwhile, I swallow the drugs in the container in my boxers, followed by some water (shit stuck in my teeth), and light up a cigarette.

He comes back. "where you headed?"

"I live right across the street, right there"

"When you gonna get that headlight fixed?"

"uh...um...first thing tomorrow, sir"

"I'm gonna give you a warning tonght. You better get right home, because I can smell some serious liquor on your breath."

"Thank you, sir"

"Have a good night."

"You are my best friend!" (yes, I actually said that)



and now I'm home to do some serious celebrating!!!!!

Last edited by sedated; 03-17-2007 at 12:26 PM..
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Old 03-19-2007, 10:25 PM   #166
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luv
I still think the nice officer must've thought you were cute. He knows your address now. I'd be careful. Next thing you know, you'll be getting ass-raped instead of arrested.
We can only hope.
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Old 03-19-2007, 10:33 PM   #167
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedated


not to make light of anyone whose killed anyone by drunk driving, those people are scum and deserve the ass-raping they get.

but, I'm far from the sort. I've done enough drinking to know my limit, and that night was not it, would have been a normal night had it not been for the headlight.


but, to make you all feel better, I drove home at least 3 times as drunk as last night and made it home safe. lesson learned.
You are such a f**king dick weed.
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Old 03-19-2007, 10:38 PM   #168
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedated
I try my best to base my life on what strangers on the internet tell me about my best interests.



have I killed anyone? no.

have I been close? no.

I had a close encounter with a cop that didn't see me worthy of taking to the station for the night, and felt like sharing that story with the rest of you fuckers. I felt some could relate, I didn't think I'd dredge up a bunch of painful memories and what-ifs...
I've pulled the trigger on this revolver 5 times and nothing happened. I must be safe.

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Old 03-19-2007, 10:54 PM   #169
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedated
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone, mother fuckers.
No problem dipshit.
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Old 03-19-2007, 11:00 PM   #170
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedated
I just want to express my appreciation for everyone that has sent me good rep and good thoughts after I've been continuously attacked on this thread.

some of you are bigger prejudice deuche-bags than I ever imagined. (except Iowanian, he's just still as big a deuche-bag as I had imagined).
I'm prejudiced about people risking other people's lives because they have no self control. I'll own that.
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Old 03-19-2007, 11:02 PM   #171
unothadeal unothadeal is offline
HOF 20??
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sedated
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone, mother fuckers.
I don't think that's exactly how He said it.
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Old 03-19-2007, 11:28 PM   #172
Demonpenz Demonpenz is offline
Woman should only make babies
 
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I pray if I have kids they learn to deal with stress without the bottle or pills. I am wound up so tight by the weekend I always go out drinking. I am also single. I am just getting to the stage that partying isn't what it used to be. I am balder old dude at the club now.
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Old 03-19-2007, 11:37 PM   #173
Frazod Frazod is offline
Did you hear what I said?
 
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Hey Simplex, did you REALLY need to break "Hey Sedated you suck" into seven distinct posts?
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Old 03-22-2007, 11:58 PM   #174
Simplex3 Simplex3 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by frazod
Hey Simplex, did you REALLY need to break "Hey Sedated you suck" into seven distinct posts?
Yes.
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