Let's hear the most offensive jokes you can think of! - Page 32

Clint in Wichita · 05-22-2003, 11:43 AM

To avoid a debate, you may want to leave out the ethnic jokes. However, if you do decide to post an ethnic joke, it won't bother me at all.

My first contribution, heard about a week ago:

Q: What's even better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

A: Not being reeruned.

Next?

EM31 · 12-01-2007, 04:13 PM

Q. Why do you wrap duct tape around a hamster?

A. So that it doesn't split when you F@ck it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I used to be a necrophiliac until some rotten c@nt split on me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**pr_capone** · 12-20-2007, 04:02 PM

After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse.
He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left.
He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life.
Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"

**pr_capone** · 12-20-2007, 04:02 PM

A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labour is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth.
"I'm afraid I don't have a husband" she replies.
"O.K. do you have a boyfriend?" asks the Midwife.
"No, no boyfriend either."
"Do you have a partner then?"
"No, I'm unattached, I'll be having my baby on my own."
After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman.
"You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that the baby is black"
"Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a Porno movie. The lead man was black."
"Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair."
"Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what else could I do?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my business and I hate to pry further but your baby has asian eyes."
"Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was a little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice."
At this the midwife again apologises collects the baby and presents her to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the bum. The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Thank God for that!" "What do you mean?" says the midwife, shocked.
"WHEW!" says the girl extremely relieved...
"I had this horrible feeling that it was going to bark!"

Mr. Laz · 12-20-2007, 04:07 PM

i miss Red ..... cli(n)t you bastige!!!

kcmaxwell · 12-20-2007, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DenverChief

Whats the worst part about eating a vegetable?

Taking off the diapers

and getting around the wheelchair...

Bump · 12-20-2007, 04:33 PM

You know why black people don't go to Church's around here?

because all we have is KFC & Popeyes

FD · 12-20-2007, 04:53 PM

Why do you put a baby feet first into the blender?

So you can cum on its face as it dies.

LOCOChief · 12-20-2007, 05:02 PM

How do you keep a dog from humping your leg?

Pick it up and suck its dick!

LOCOChief · 12-20-2007, 05:03 PM

What's nastier than a pile of dead babies?

One at the bottom eating its way out.

beach tribe · 12-20-2007, 06:33 PM

what's the best thing about an 8 yr old girl in the shower?

if you slick her hair back she looks like a 6 yr old boy.

I'm sorry

TEX · 12-20-2007, 07:42 PM

Herm Edwards is the Chiefs HC.

dtebbe · 12-20-2007, 10:00 PM

Q: What do you say to a battered woman with two black eyes?

A: Nuthin', the bitch done been told twice

Bump · 12-21-2007, 02:12 AM

A black child was sent to heaven
and the black child met an angel with wings
the angel then gave the black child wings also
the black child asked if these wings made him an angel too
the angel responded

"Nah n**ga, you a bat!"

KC Kings · 12-21-2007, 06:54 AM

-How many black guys does it take to shingle a roof?
-It depends on how thin you slice them

-What is white and 9" long?
-Nothing

-Why does a Mexican eat Tomales for Christmas?
-So they have something to unwrap

-What do you say to a black jew?
-Get in the Back of the oven!

-Did you hear about the jewish child molestor?
-He hid in the bushes and said, "Hey little boy, wanna buy some candy?"

-What's the difference between a black man and a snow tire?
-A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it.

-What starts with an N and ends with an R that you never want to call a black person?
-Neighbor

PhillyChiefFan · 12-21-2007, 08:54 AM

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man?

A pizza can feed a family of 4.

05-22-2003, 11:43 AM
Clint in Wichita Veteran Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $10004900	Let's hear the most offensive jokes you can think of! To avoid a debate, you may want to leave out the ethnic jokes. However, if you do decide to post an ethnic joke, it won't bother me at all. My first contribution, heard about a week ago: Q: What's even better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not being reeruned. Next?
Posts: 4,458

12-01-2007, 04:13 PM	#466
EM31 Starter Join Date: Jan 2007 Casino cash: $10004900	Q. Why do you wrap duct tape around a hamster? A. So that it doesn't split when you F@ck it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I used to be a necrophiliac until some rotten c@nt split on me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Posts: 39

12-20-2007, 04:02 PM	#467
pr_capone THREEPEAT!!! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: NWMO Casino cash: $9948214	After losing his fortune, a Texas oilman decided to spend his last twenty bucks at a whorehouse. He entered and promptly went up to the Madam and asked her what he could get for $20. The Madam gave him a lengthy stare and told him to go upstairs, last door on the left. He proceeded to march up the stairs and entered the room. To his shock and pleasure he saw a beautiful blonde waiting naked on the bed. So he tore off his clothes and jumped on and started pumping away for dear life. Upon orgasm he noticed that stuff started oozing out of her eyeballs. He runs down to the Madam to report this and she looks at him turns around and yells, "Hey Charlie....... The dead one's full again!"
Posts: 19,897

12-20-2007, 04:02 PM	#468
pr_capone THREEPEAT!!! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: NWMO Casino cash: $9948214	A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labour is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. "I'm afraid I don't have a husband" she replies. "O.K. do you have a boyfriend?" asks the Midwife. "No, no boyfriend either." "Do you have a partner then?" "No, I'm unattached, I'll be having my baby on my own." After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman. "You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that the baby is black" "Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a Porno movie. The lead man was black." "Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair." "Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what else could I do?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my business and I hate to pry further but your baby has asian eyes." "Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was a little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice." At this the midwife again apologises collects the baby and presents her to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the bum. The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Thank God for that!" "What do you mean?" says the midwife, shocked. "WHEW!" says the girl extremely relieved... "I had this horrible feeling that it was going to bark!"
Posts: 19,897

12-20-2007, 04:07 PM	#469
Mr. Laz Don't Tease Me Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: KS Casino cash: $11047037	i miss Red ..... cli(n)t you bastige!!! __________________
Posts: 95,626

12-20-2007, 04:33 PM	#471
Bump YOU take YOUR seat Join Date: Nov 2007 Casino cash: $-1504895	You know why black people don't go to Church's around here? because all we have is KFC & Popeyes
Posts: 38,121

12-20-2007, 04:53 PM	#472
FD Veteran Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Indiana Casino cash: $9372813	Why do you put a baby feet first into the blender? So you can cum on its face as it dies.
Posts: 4,440

12-20-2007, 05:02 PM	#473
LOCOChief True Chiefs Fan Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Bull Bay Casino cash: $6605791	How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick!
Posts: 5,453

12-20-2007, 05:03 PM	#474
LOCOChief True Chiefs Fan Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Bull Bay Casino cash: $6605791	What's nastier than a pile of dead babies? One at the bottom eating its way out.
Posts: 5,453

12-20-2007, 06:33 PM	#475
beach tribe Keep doubting J MFing Houston Join Date: May 2007 Location: ft.lauderdale Casino cash: $3978036	what's the best thing about an 8 yr old girl in the shower? if you slick her hair back she looks like a 6 yr old boy. I'm sorry
Posts: 21,429

12-20-2007, 07:42 PM	#476
TEX Out Gunning CP's Fandom Police Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Galveston, TX Casino cash: $-1286873	Herm Edwards is the Chiefs HC. __________________ "Do we have time to run WASP?"
Posts: 37,063

12-20-2007, 10:00 PM	#477
dtebbe 3M TA3 Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: SoFlo Casino cash: $9993039	Q: What do you say to a battered woman with two black eyes? A: Nuthin', the bitch done been told twice
Posts: 4,305

12-21-2007, 02:12 AM	#478
Bump YOU take YOUR seat Join Date: Nov 2007 Casino cash: $-1504895	A black child was sent to heaven and the black child met an angel with wings the angel then gave the black child wings also the black child asked if these wings made him an angel too the angel responded "Nah n**ga, you a bat!"
Posts: 38,121

12-21-2007, 06:54 AM	#479
KC Kings Veteran Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: KC Casino cash: $10004900	-How many black guys does it take to shingle a roof? -It depends on how thin you slice them -What is white and 9" long? -Nothing -Why does a Mexican eat Tomales for Christmas? -So they have something to unwrap -What do you say to a black jew? -Get in the Back of the oven! -Did you hear about the jewish child molestor? -He hid in the bushes and said, "Hey little boy, wanna buy some candy?" -What's the difference between a black man and a snow tire? -A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it. -What starts with an N and ends with an R that you never want to call a black person? -Neighbor
Posts: 4,348

12-21-2007, 08:54 AM	#480
PhillyChiefFan Veteran Join Date: May 2007 Location: Harrisburg, PA Casino cash: $3201139	What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? A pizza can feed a family of 4.
Posts: 3,407