Life Suicide? - Page 22

Brianfo · 12-19-2011, 09:02 PM

Have you ever contemplated suicide? I have, I think about it everyday. I think my kids and wife would be better off without me. My wife is an absolute angel. She did not deserve to be stuck with me. I know that it's the right thing to do. But it's cowardly. I know for a fact that I am going to hell. I love my kids and wife so much, but I have not been a good father.

Dr. Johnny Fever · 12-20-2011, 11:09 AM

I'm not sure if posting this is the thing to do or not but considering the "events" of the last several hours here I'm going to anyway.

I've seen a few people question why a person would post something like this on here and on the surface that's a good point. However I can say from personal experience that it can save a life because it quite possible saved mine. Several years ago I posted a thread much like this one. I almost immediately wished I hadn't and was embarassed by it... however looking back now I'm glad I did. Someone on here pm'd me when they saw my thread. We got to talking and she didn't judge me or call me stupid or to grow up or that I was being selfish. She just listened and encouraged. For the last several years that person has been my best friend in real life away from this board. We visit each other when we can and talk often and without her I'm not sure if I'd be here or not. This is a debt I can never repay. She's always said us becoming best friends is all the repayment she'll ever need though.

Would I have gone through with it? I don't know. I was in an awfully dark place. I guess I posted about it on here as a way to reach out anonymously and not burden my family or other friends and I didn't feel like I could afford counseling.

I'm all better now... have been for a long time. Counseling and anti-depressants and a whole new outlook on life since has got me looking back on that with part regret... but mostly thankfullness that while I looked pathetic "publically" here, someone stepped up for me. I wasn't even expecting that but it happened.

After I did it and let everyone know the next day that I was ok I disappeared from here for a long time because I didn't want to be "the pathetic loser who talked about killing himself" to everyone here.

My point in telling this story is two-fold.

One... a lot of people in this thread have done the right thing by reaching out and whether you ever know it or not you may have helped Brianfo. You're all to be commended imo. If he contacts any of us I hope and believe we'll be there for him like my friend was for me. It IS a worthy thing to do to reach out.

Two... if you do read this thread and this post Brianfo, you need to know that you aren't alone. Someone did the same thing as you here and everything changed for the better. If you'll let someone help you... be it here or a professional counselor, minister or just a family member or friend, it can help you too. You've cried out for help... now accept that help. You can contact me if you want or I'm sure any number of people who have offered here. Just don't go at it alone.

**doomy3** · 12-20-2011, 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beer me

I'm not sure if posting this is the thing to do or not but considering the "events" of the last several hours here I'm going to anyway.

I've seen a few people question why a person would post something like this on here and on the surface that's a good point. However I can say from personal experience that it can save a life because it quite possible saved mine. Several years ago I posted a thread much like this one. I almost immediately wished I hadn't and was embarassed by it... however looking back now I'm glad I did. Someone on here pm'd me when they saw my thread. We got to talking and she didn't judge me or call me stupid or to grow up or that I was being selfish. She just listened and encouraged. For the last several years that person has been my best friend in real life away from this board. We visit each other when we can and talk often and without her I'm not sure if I'd be here or not. This is a debt I can never repay. She's always said us becoming best friends is all the repayment she'll ever need though.

Would I have gone through with it? I don't know. I was in an awfully dark place. I guess I posted about it on here as a way to reach out anonymously and not burden my family or other friends and I didn't feel like I could afford counseling.

I'm all better now... have been for a long time. Counseling and anti-depressants and a whole new outlook on life since has got me looking back on that with part regret... but mostly thankfullness that while I looked pathetic "publically" here, someone stepped up for me. I wasn't even expecting that but it happened.

After I did it and let everyone know the next day that I was ok I disappeared from here for a long time because I didn't want to be "the pathetic loser who talked about killing himself" to everyone here.

My point in telling this story is two-fold.

One... a lot of people in this thread have done the right thing by reaching out and whether you ever know it or not you may have helped Brianfo. You're all to be commended imo. If he contacts any of us I hope and believe we'll be there for him like my friend was for me. It IS a worthy thing to do to reach out.

Two... if you do read this thread and this post Brianfo, you need to know that you aren't alone. Someone did the same thing as you here and everything changed for the better. If you'll let someone help you... be it here or a professional counselor, minister or just a family member or friend, it can help you too. You've cried out for help... now accept that help. You can contact me if you want or I'm sure any number of people who have offered here. Just don't go at it alone.

That's awesome man, thanks for sharing that. Glad you didn't follow through with that and got some help.

Unfortunately, Tribal Warfare proved you wrong earlier when he said this doesn't ever happen.

**ShortRoundChief** · 12-20-2011, 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gonzo

I be rapin' e'rybody up in here.
Posted via Mobile Device

Ahhh Shit.

Lock yer doors, hide yor kids, hide yor wives...

BIG_DADDY · 12-20-2011, 11:24 AM

I tripped on this thread trying glance over the news and can't hang out but what you need to know is that the majority of people deal with moderate to high levels of depression at some point in their life. You are not the exception to the rule. There is a reason for this as well. There is also a process you need to go through now to understand where you are at and it would take me a long time to go over it here but I would be willing to do that should you request it by PM. The most important thing right now is just that you commit yourself to a specific period of time like say a year to do everything you can to address this problem. I have had 5 people I have helped in this area in my lifetime. One would not even attempt the process. He left an aboslutely beautiful wife and son behind. I posted an article on it years ago on the Planet. The other 4 fully embraced the process and 3 of them are happier than most people by a long shot and are not on any meds. The other was off everything and perfect for a year before he became too lazy to stay with it and is back on the drugs. There is hope dude, just commit to a period of time and do everything you can to work through it.

FAX · 12-20-2011, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RubberSponge

I never said it was bad. I said quite clearly many times that it could go either way. And I don't have a do nothing philosophy. I just don't think the facts were known to warrant the PI work that was done. You have not been listening to my position at all. You've made the assumption that I don't care. I just don't have enough information to call the police to his house.

FWIW part of my everday job deals with crisis management with people.

Damn.

That makes me want to jump.

FAX

johnny961 · 12-20-2011, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blaise

We can second guess this all we want, but hindsight is 50/50.

Thats just it. Nobody really knows what might be going through a persons head when they make a statement like this or how they will react to another persons response to the statement. Assuming this guy was serious, this could have several possible outcomes.
1. It could make him feel better knowing someone cares enough to send the cops to his door at 2am and make him seek help.
2. It could make the guy feel foolish and decide to reevaluate his line of thinking.
3. It could piss the guy off.
4. It could humiliate the guy having the cops show up and further isolate him. In this scenario guy probably decides not only not to get help but further learns the consequences of opening up to others and decides to act in the future without telling anyone.

I am sure there are other possible outcomes. My point being no one really knows for sure how an anonymous person like this will react and you could second guess any attempt to help to no end. I still think its better that Phil chose to try to help rather than do nothing. One could possibly debate the choices on exactly how this was handled but IMO its better to do something than nothing.

Thig Lyfe · 12-20-2011, 11:55 AM

Sounds like somebody needs to re-watch It's A Wonderful Life.

**Gonzo** · 12-20-2011, 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SportsRacer

Sounds like somebody needs to re-watch It's A Wonderful Life.

scho63 · 12-20-2011, 12:14 PM

I hope this guy get's help and we all move on because this thread has become too long and too depressing-let's move to a thread with a positive discussion

seclark · 12-20-2011, 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scho63

I hope this guy get's help and we all move on because this thread has become too long and too depressing-let's move to a thread with a positive discussion

schnozberry!

teedubya · 12-20-2011, 12:20 PM

Hey Brianfo...

Mr. Plow · 12-20-2011, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark

schnozberry!

That's my safe word - get your own damnit.

ClearmontChief · 12-20-2011, 12:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beer me

I'm not sure if posting this is the thing to do or not but considering the "events" of the last several hours here I'm going to anyway.

I've seen a few people question why a person would post something like this on here and on the surface that's a good point. However I can say from personal experience that it can save a life because it quite possible saved mine. Several years ago I posted a thread much like this one. I almost immediately wished I hadn't and was embarassed by it... however looking back now I'm glad I did. Someone on here pm'd me when they saw my thread. We got to talking and she didn't judge me or call me stupid or to grow up or that I was being selfish. She just listened and encouraged. For the last several years that person has been my best friend in real life away from this board. We visit each other when we can and talk often and without her I'm not sure if I'd be here or not. This is a debt I can never repay. She's always said us becoming best friends is all the repayment she'll ever need though.

Would I have gone through with it? I don't know. I was in an awfully dark place. I guess I posted about it on here as a way to reach out anonymously and not burden my family or other friends and I didn't feel like I could afford counseling.

I'm all better now... have been for a long time. Counseling and anti-depressants and a whole new outlook on life since has got me looking back on that with part regret... but mostly thankfullness that while I looked pathetic "publically" here, someone stepped up for me. I wasn't even expecting that but it happened.

After I did it and let everyone know the next day that I was ok I disappeared from here for a long time because I didn't want to be "the pathetic loser who talked about killing himself" to everyone here.

My point in telling this story is two-fold.

One... a lot of people in this thread have done the right thing by reaching out and whether you ever know it or not you may have helped Brianfo. You're all to be commended imo. If he contacts any of us I hope and believe we'll be there for him like my friend was for me. It IS a worthy thing to do to reach out.

Two... if you do read this thread and this post Brianfo, you need to know that you aren't alone. Someone did the same thing as you here and everything changed for the better. If you'll let someone help you... be it here or a professional counselor, minister or just a family member or friend, it can help you too. You've cried out for help... now accept that help. You can contact me if you want or I'm sure any number of people who have offered here. Just don't go at it alone.

Congrats to you for making it through, reaching out and receiving help. As I read your words, it's obvious from the point of view of someone who's contemplated suicide as a logical escape from your pain. To those going through those thoughts, I'm sure you don't consider it as cowardly or selfish. I understand that completely. Those going through it may think it is courageous or takes bravery. But, you can't think of it JUST in those terms. There are victims of suicide...and, I'm not talking about the person putting the gun in the mouth or taking the handful of pills. I'm talking about the family VICTIMS. When a person hurts, and has decided to become 'brave' enough to complete the act, they don't think about anything else. They don't think about the victims they're leaving behind. They merely think that they're in pain, and this is the way for them to escape THEIR pain. But, they selfishly don't consider the transferrance of pain to their wife or husband, parents, or children. Pain doesn't go away, it's just transferred to someone else to deal with. My family is a victim of suicide, it changed my wife forever. Our oldest kids hurt from it...perhaps even would now be more likely to see it as an option when they hurt.

Sorry, there is more than one person effected by suicide. Might take them courage to complete. But, passing their pain to others is cowardly and selfish. If more people would consider how their daughter will be effected, what will it do to Mom, what will my friends think? Maybe that pause would be enough to stop it from happening and having them reach out for help.

kc rush · 12-20-2011, 12:50 PM

Well, he checked in on this thread around 12:30. I was hoping he would post something.

Hope all works out for you Brian.

**Gonzo** · 12-20-2011, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seclark

schnozberry!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Plow

That's my safe word - get your own damnit.

His safe word will be....

Bananafapper

12-19-2011, 09:02 PM
Brianfo Veteran Join Date: Apr 2002 Casino cash: $10004900	Suicide? Have you ever contemplated suicide? I have, I think about it everyday. I think my kids and wife would be better off without me. My wife is an absolute angel. She did not deserve to be stuck with me. I know that it's the right thing to do. But it's cowardly. I know for a fact that I am going to hell. I love my kids and wife so much, but I have not been a good father.
Posts: 1,325

12-20-2011, 11:09 AM	#316
Dr. Johnny Fever stax of wax Join Date: Feb 2004 Casino cash: $10004900	I'm not sure if posting this is the thing to do or not but considering the "events" of the last several hours here I'm going to anyway. I've seen a few people question why a person would post something like this on here and on the surface that's a good point. However I can say from personal experience that it can save a life because it quite possible saved mine. Several years ago I posted a thread much like this one. I almost immediately wished I hadn't and was embarassed by it... however looking back now I'm glad I did. Someone on here pm'd me when they saw my thread. We got to talking and she didn't judge me or call me stupid or to grow up or that I was being selfish. She just listened and encouraged. For the last several years that person has been my best friend in real life away from this board. We visit each other when we can and talk often and without her I'm not sure if I'd be here or not. This is a debt I can never repay. She's always said us becoming best friends is all the repayment she'll ever need though. Would I have gone through with it? I don't know. I was in an awfully dark place. I guess I posted about it on here as a way to reach out anonymously and not burden my family or other friends and I didn't feel like I could afford counseling. I'm all better now... have been for a long time. Counseling and anti-depressants and a whole new outlook on life since has got me looking back on that with part regret... but mostly thankfullness that while I looked pathetic "publically" here, someone stepped up for me. I wasn't even expecting that but it happened. After I did it and let everyone know the next day that I was ok I disappeared from here for a long time because I didn't want to be "the pathetic loser who talked about killing himself" to everyone here. My point in telling this story is two-fold. One... a lot of people in this thread have done the right thing by reaching out and whether you ever know it or not you may have helped Brianfo. You're all to be commended imo. If he contacts any of us I hope and believe we'll be there for him like my friend was for me. It IS a worthy thing to do to reach out. Two... if you do read this thread and this post Brianfo, you need to know that you aren't alone. Someone did the same thing as you here and everything changed for the better. If you'll let someone help you... be it here or a professional counselor, minister or just a family member or friend, it can help you too. You've cried out for help... now accept that help. You can contact me if you want or I'm sure any number of people who have offered here. Just don't go at it alone. __________________ courtesy of BoneKrusher "Baseball? It's just a game. As simple as a ball and bat, yet as complex as the American spirit it symbolizes. It's a sport, a business and sometimes a religion." Ernie Harwell
Posts: 34,865

12-20-2011, 11:24 AM	#319
BIG_DADDY THE RED MENACE Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texas Casino cash: $2568410	I tripped on this thread trying glance over the news and can't hang out but what you need to know is that the majority of people deal with moderate to high levels of depression at some point in their life. You are not the exception to the rule. There is a reason for this as well. There is also a process you need to go through now to understand where you are at and it would take me a long time to go over it here but I would be willing to do that should you request it by PM. The most important thing right now is just that you commit yourself to a specific period of time like say a year to do everything you can to address this problem. I have had 5 people I have helped in this area in my lifetime. One would not even attempt the process. He left an aboslutely beautiful wife and son behind. I posted an article on it years ago on the Planet. The other 4 fully embraced the process and 3 of them are happier than most people by a long shot and are not on any meds. The other was off everything and perfect for a year before he became too lazy to stay with it and is back on the drugs. There is hope dude, just commit to a period of time and do everything you can to work through it. __________________ The diabolical genius of Marxism-Socialism is that it provides the emotional and intellectual road map for autocrats to persuade millions of people to support their own enslavement to government. ~Mark Levin April 15, 2019
Posts: 32,522

12-20-2011, 11:55 AM	#322
Thig Lyfe Banned Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Thigpen's America Casino cash: $10004900	Sounds like somebody needs to re-watch It's A Wonderful Life.
Posts: 25,680

12-20-2011, 12:14 PM	#324
scho63 Politically Incorrect Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Scottsdale, AZ Casino cash: $-760000	I hope this guy get's help and we all move on because this thread has become too long and too depressing-let's move to a thread with a positive discussion
Posts: 54,949

12-20-2011, 12:20 PM	#326
teedubya Most Valuable Poster Join Date: Oct 2003 Casino cash: $8993042	Hey Brianfo...
Posts: 36,830

12-20-2011, 12:50 PM	#329
kc rush Blah Blah Blah Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: In front of the computer. Casino cash: $2059559	Well, he checked in on this thread around 12:30. I was hoping he would post something. Hope all works out for you Brian.
Posts: 12,593