Life -- How do you cope w/ your 'Swamp-Ass' issue? - Page 2

Delano · 02-16-2010, 03:10 PM

Oh, and by the way, Axe spray has entirely too much alcohol. Try to find a spray with no alcohol.
Posted via Mobile Device

Bi_polar · 02-16-2010, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

Oh, and by the way, Axe spray has entirely too much alcohol. Try to find a spray with no alcohol.
Posted via Mobile Device

Some Parfumers offer a scented talc powder.

JOhn · 02-16-2010, 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

Oh, and by the way, Axe spray has entirely too much alcohol. Try to find a spray with no alcohol.
Posted via Mobile Device

Experience?

tooge · 02-16-2010, 03:13 PM

I generally only get swampass golfing, hiking, or working outside in the hottest of weather. In any case, I'm in no mood to try to score at that point anyhow, I just want A/C and a cold beer. Shower, that is all.

**Buck** · 02-16-2010, 03:16 PM

Sometimes you cant help it in the 115 degree heat.

Solution: Move to Olathe.

Silock · 02-16-2010, 03:18 PM

The **** is swampass?

Kerberos · 02-16-2010, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Silock

The **************** is swampass?

You'd know it if you had Swampass.

Cats and dogs would follow you around for weeks. (So I've heard)

**DaFace** · 02-16-2010, 03:20 PM

I don't believe I have ever powdered or deodorized my ass. That seems really odd.

journeyscarab · 02-16-2010, 03:21 PM

SNL did a skit for "Ass Don't Smell"

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/92/92eass.phtml

Ass Don't Smell

Bob.....Kevin Nealon
Male Co-Worker #1.....Rob Schneider
Male Co-Worker #2.....David Spade
Male Co-Worker #3.....Tim Meadows

Bob: Let me bring you up to date on the Civic Center project..

Male Co-Worker #1: [ sniffing the air ] Did somebody step in something?

Bob: I had Ted draw these up over the weekend..

Male Co-Worker #1: Oh, come on! Doesn't anybody else smell it?

[ turns around and disgusts tow other co-workers with the smell from his ass ]

Bob: I think we've finally solved the underground garage problem..

Male Co-Worker #1: I'm sorry. I can't concentrate. Can't we do this over the phone?

Male Co-Worker #2: Yes!

[ everyone leaves the office, leaving confused ]

[ SUPER: The Next Day ]

Bob: [ notices Ass Don't Smell canister on his desk ] Ass Don't Smell? [ thinking ] Hmm.. maybe osmebody's trying to tell me something..

Announcer: Scrubbing doesn't work; perfumes only cover it up; and who has the time to soak? Forget all that junk, and step up to Ass Don't Smell.

[ SUPER: A Week Later ]

Male Co-Worker #3: Hey, Bob! Congratulations on the Civic Center project!

Bob: Thanks!

Male Co-Worker #3: [ notices canister in Bob's locker ] Huh? Ass Don't Smell? But your ass doesn't smell.

Bob: [ smiling confidently ] Exactly.

Announcer: Ass Don't Smell. The name says it all. Now, in new tamper-proof package.

Mr. Laz · 02-16-2010, 03:23 PM

someone must not wipe correctly or something ... just take a shower before you go out.

Bi_polar · 02-16-2010, 03:27 PM

GUYZ TRUST ME,

Bitches don't wanna smell your ass when they're dealing hummers. TRUST ME!

JOhn · 02-16-2010, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bi_polar

GUYZ TRUST ME,

Bitches don't wanna smell your ass when they're dealing hummers. TRUST ME!

Well especially those freaky chicks that like to lick, err nevermind

Frazod · 02-16-2010, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bi_polar

GUYZ TRUST ME,

Bitches don't wanna smell your ass when they're dealing hummers. TRUST ME!

Maybe you should just shove one of those Glade things up your ass. You could keep several handy and give her her choice of scents, just like they do at the car wash.

Stewie · 02-16-2010, 03:31 PM

Define "swamp-ass." The ass is right there, the next door over. Should it smell like shit, no, should it be floral, no.

Sofa King · 02-16-2010, 03:35 PM

two things..

1st. Swamp ass can also be called Goo Butt... and if you dont take care of it, it will turn into Chapped Ass... which is not pleasant..

2nd.

02-16-2010, 03:13 PM	#4
tooge MVP Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Liberty, MO Casino cash: $2634112	I generally only get swampass golfing, hiking, or working outside in the hottest of weather. In any case, I'm in no mood to try to score at that point anyhow, I just want A/C and a cold beer. Shower, that is all.
Posts: 16,024

02-16-2010, 03:16 PM	#5
Buck Take a Chill Pill Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South Carolina Casino cash: $7849900	Sometimes you cant help it in the 115 degree heat. Solution: Move to Olathe.
Posts: 44,565

02-16-2010, 03:18 PM	#6
Silock MVP Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Overland Park Casino cash: $10020882	The **** is swampass?
Posts: 19,908

02-16-2010, 03:20 PM	#8
DaFace Kind of a mod Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Donkey Land Casino cash: $536899	I don't believe I have ever powdered or deodorized my ass. That seems really odd.
Posts: 52,326

02-16-2010, 03:21 PM	#9
journeyscarab SHOCKERS BABY! Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Overland Park, KS Casino cash: $2843555	SNL did a skit for "Ass Don't Smell" http://snltranscripts.jt.org/92/92eass.phtml Ass Don't Smell Bob.....Kevin Nealon Male Co-Worker #1.....Rob Schneider Male Co-Worker #2.....David Spade Male Co-Worker #3.....Tim Meadows Bob: Let me bring you up to date on the Civic Center project.. Male Co-Worker #1: [ sniffing the air ] Did somebody step in something? Bob: I had Ted draw these up over the weekend.. Male Co-Worker #1: Oh, come on! Doesn't anybody else smell it? [ turns around and disgusts tow other co-workers with the smell from his ass ] Bob: I think we've finally solved the underground garage problem.. Male Co-Worker #1: I'm sorry. I can't concentrate. Can't we do this over the phone? Male Co-Worker #2: Yes! [ everyone leaves the office, leaving confused ] [ SUPER: The Next Day ] Bob: [ notices Ass Don't Smell canister on his desk ] Ass Don't Smell? [ thinking ] Hmm.. maybe osmebody's trying to tell me something.. Announcer: Scrubbing doesn't work; perfumes only cover it up; and who has the time to soak? Forget all that junk, and step up to Ass Don't Smell. [ SUPER: A Week Later ] Male Co-Worker #3: Hey, Bob! Congratulations on the Civic Center project! Bob: Thanks! Male Co-Worker #3: [ notices canister in Bob's locker ] Huh? Ass Don't Smell? But your ass doesn't smell. Bob: [ smiling confidently ] Exactly. Announcer: Ass Don't Smell. The name says it all. Now, in new tamper-proof package.
Posts: 3,414

02-16-2010, 03:10 PM	#1
Delano [b]Supporter[/b] Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: A Hypnagogic Landscape Casino cash: $8715015	Oh, and by the way, Axe spray has entirely too much alcohol. Try to find a spray with no alcohol. Posted via Mobile Device
Posts: 12,513

02-16-2010, 03:23 PM	#10
Mr. Laz Don't Tease Me Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: KS Casino cash: $11047037	someone must not wipe correctly or something ... just take a shower before you go out. __________________
Posts: 95,626

02-16-2010, 03:27 PM	#11
Bi_polar Starter Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: The Dirty Casino cash: $10004900	GUYZ TRUST ME, Bitches don't wanna smell your ass when they're dealing hummers. TRUST ME! __________________ Notices Welcome back, Bi_polar! Where ya been?
Posts: 549

02-16-2010, 03:31 PM	#14
Stewie MVP Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: West of the Equator Casino cash: $419901	Define "swamp-ass." The ass is right there, the next door over. Should it smell like shit, no, should it be floral, no.
Posts: 13,703

02-16-2010, 03:35 PM	#15
Sofa King Hello Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: South Dakota Casino cash: $-337904 VARSITY	two things.. 1st. Swamp ass can also be called Goo Butt... and if you dont take care of it, it will turn into Chapped Ass... which is not pleasant.. 2nd.
Posts: 23,330