Funny Stuff ****OFFICIAL DAD JOKES THREAD**** - Page 2

In58men · 09:29 PM

How does the moon give the sun a haircut?

Eclipse it.

Why Not? · 08-17-2017, 09:43 PM

What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?

"Dam"

Simply Red · 08-17-2017, 10:12 PM

Simply Red · 08-17-2017, 10:14 PM

**The Franchise** · 08-17-2017, 10:20 PM

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef

Nickhead · 08-17-2017, 11:11 PM

what do you call a hooker with a runny nose?

full

kjwood75nro · 08-18-2017, 12:00 AM

Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors?

Because if it had 4, it'd be called a chicken sedan.

Nickhead · 08-18-2017, 12:03 AM

your mom's so fat, she has to open a window to wipe

frozenchief · 08-18-2017, 01:33 AM

Why the old lady fall into the well? She didn't see that well.

What did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead. I'll give these two a lift.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

Nickhead · 08-18-2017, 01:43 AM

what was hitlers favorite breakfast juice?

eDave · 08-18-2017, 03:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nickhead

what was hitlers favorite breakfast juice?

100% concentrated orange Jews.

Anne Frankly it's funny as heil. I give it Nein out of Nein.

stumppy · 08-18-2017, 03:42 AM

Why did the chicken cross the road?

I'm not sure but it was probably because your mom is a lying whore! See you in a month.

Nickhead · 08-18-2017, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eDave

100% concentrated orange Jews.

Anne Frankly it's funny as heil. I give it Nein out of Nein.

twat did you say, i **** here you, or maybe i should just finger it out myself.

i see said the blind man, as he grabbed his hammer and saw.

Nickhead · 08-18-2017, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stumppy

Why did the chicken cross the road?

I'm not sure but it was probably because your mom is a lying whore! See you in a month.

to prove to the opossum it can be done.

**Baby Lee** · 08-19-2017, 02:47 PM

Farmer calls his [talking] dog to gather his flock.
Dog runs out, does his business, reports back.
'There you go, 40 sheep all in the pen.'
Farmer says 'but I only sent 36 sheep out to pasture this morning.'

'Yeah, I rounded them up.'

**lewdog** · 08-19-2017, 04:19 PM

When the teacher asked to arsonist to describe The theory of relativity, the arsonist replied, "That's the burning question."

08-17-2017, 07:50 PM
In58men Baba Ganoush Join Date: Jan 2012 Casino cash: $2058026	**OFFICIAL DAD JOKES THREAD** How does the moon give the sun a haircut? Eclipse it. Last edited by In58men; 08-17-2017 at 09:29 PM..
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08-17-2017, 09:43 PM	#16
Why Not? In Search of a Life Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Kansas Casino cash: $2928994	What did the fish say when it swam into the wall? "Dam"
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08-17-2017, 10:12 PM	#17
Simply Red You Sweetie! Join Date: Sep 2005 Casino cash: $2021206219 VARSITY
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08-17-2017, 10:14 PM	#18
Simply Red You Sweetie! Join Date: Sep 2005 Casino cash: $2021206219 VARSITY
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08-17-2017, 10:20 PM	#19
The Franchise Most Valuable Villain Join Date: Dec 2006 Casino cash: $2875047	What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef
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08-17-2017, 11:11 PM	#20
Nickhead EvOlVeD Join Date: Jun 2016 Location: Blue Mountains, Australia Casino cash: $2419868	what do you call a hooker with a runny nose? full
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08-18-2017, 12:00 AM	#21
kjwood75nro Veteran Join Date: Jan 2014 Casino cash: $3825150	Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors? Because if it had 4, it'd be called a chicken sedan.
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08-18-2017, 12:03 AM	#22
Nickhead EvOlVeD Join Date: Jun 2016 Location: Blue Mountains, Australia Casino cash: $2419868	your mom's so fat, she has to open a window to wipe
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08-18-2017, 01:33 AM	#23
frozenchief Cynical Misanthrope Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Alaska Casino cash: $1391379	Why the old lady fall into the well? She didn't see that well. What did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead. I'll give these two a lift. What's brown and sticky? A stick
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08-18-2017, 01:43 AM	#24
Nickhead EvOlVeD Join Date: Jun 2016 Location: Blue Mountains, Australia Casino cash: $2419868	what was hitlers favorite breakfast juice?
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08-18-2017, 03:42 AM	#26
stumppy New and Improved Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Springfield, Mo. Casino cash: $1258590	Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but it was probably because your mom is a lying whore! See you in a month. __________________ “As a nation, we can endure damaging policies for a four-year term. But we cannot survive a president willing to terminate our Constitution”
Posts: 21,177

08-19-2017, 02:47 PM	#29
Baby Lee Supporter Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $6838598	Farmer calls his [talking] dog to gather his flock. Dog runs out, does his business, reports back. 'There you go, 40 sheep all in the pen.' Farmer says 'but I only sent 36 sheep out to pasture this morning.' 'Yeah, I rounded them up.' __________________ We need the kind of courage that can withstand the subtle corruption of the cynics - E.W. Last edited by Baby Lee; 08-20-2017 at 03:57 PM..
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08-19-2017, 04:19 PM	#30
lewdog Mod Team Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Valley of the hot as **** Casino cash: $1671900	When the teacher asked to arsonist to describe The theory of relativity, the arsonist replied, "That's the burning question."
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