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Old 12-17-2013, 07:54 PM  
'Hamas' Jenkins 'Hamas' Jenkins is offline
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Describe Your Worst Stomach Bug.
I'm currently blowing my nose with my ass. I've shit over 30 times today, most of which has just been watery mucus. I don't know if it's the worst bug I've ever had, but it's goddamned close.

Any cases of dysentery or Ebola out there?
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:55 PM   #2
Saul Good Saul Good is offline
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:56 PM   #3
Mr_Tomahawk Mr_Tomahawk is offline
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:57 PM   #4
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I accidentally drank some tap water in Ghana that gave me the green apple splatters for a month, even with the prescription diarrhea stuff. It was painful and I always had to be near a bathroom.
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noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.noa Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:58 PM   #5
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Almost immediately after the Chiefs won Sunday, I couldn't put enough blankets on me and I had chills. I ran a nasty fever for about 36 hours. Never puked. Never shit. But I was miserable, to be sure.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:59 PM   #6
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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I've been shitting yellow water for almost a week
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:08 PM   #7
Demonpenz Demonpenz is offline
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When I take asprin I want to blow my brains out my stomach hurts so bad. It feels like someone is scrapping my insides with a fork.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:10 PM   #8
HonestChieffan HonestChieffan is offline
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:10 PM   #9
TambaBerry TambaBerry is offline
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I had it one time where it was coming out both ends at the same time. Sitting on the toilet puking into the trash can was not fun
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TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.TambaBerry 's phone was tapped by Scott Pioli.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:21 PM   #10
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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So last tuesday randomly I moved and could hear water going down my side. I went to the bathroom and as it was coming out it sounded like when you squeeze a ketchup bottle for the last few drips of ketchup. I shit about 20 more times that evening each time it sounded like I was filling up the toilet with a hose. It was a yellow color all water. After the 19th shit I texted a friend, He said the same thing HonestChieffan said. Thing is I had shitted so much that everytime I wiped my asshole would get a little more chapped. After the 20th time I told him wiping felt like the ending of American History X.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:33 PM   #11
lewdog lewdog is offline
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I had the Norovirus during finals week of my junior year in college. Bad that it was finals week but good because my class schedule was pretty slim since all we had to do was go to the final. Every time I had diarrhea, I also had to vomit. It lasted a full 7 days.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:35 PM   #12
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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This thread is some good shit...er, bad shit....er, it's entertaining.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:39 PM   #13
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In my junior year of college, the night before the second semester started, I started feeling ill. All of a sudden anything I ate made me incredibly nauseous and I couldn't keep it down. No diarrhea or anything, but I couldn't eat anything without getting sick. No bread, no soup, no jello, nothing.

I dragged myself around for a week and finally went to the emergency room because I literally had eaten nothing. It was some sort of stomach bacterial infection. I spent five days in the hospital, and the treatment involved having my stomach pumped constantly and/or being given something to make me throw up constantly. My choice. I got my stomach pumped for two days and then couldn't stand it any more and threw up for the other three. I lost 20 pounds and was already skinny, so I was 6-0 and 130 pounds by the time I recovered.

It was the year that the Raiders and Redskins played in the Super Bowl, and I had to watch the Raiders win while having my stomach pumped. It was terrible. I had to drop most of my classes and ended up in school an extra year because of the prerequisite requirements.

The last thing I ate before I got sick was a Mars Bar, and I couldn't eat one of those for years afterward, even though that wasn't the cause.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:43 PM   #14
The Franchise The Franchise is offline
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I aapparently farted while I was taking a nap. I woke up and determined that I had shit myself.
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Old 12-17-2013, 08:50 PM   #15
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I aapparently farted while I was taking a nap. I woke up and determined that I had shit myself.
Don't be fooled. Somebody had shit in your pants.
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