Misc What's the most non-pr0nographic material you've used to..uh...spank it? - Page 4

**TinyEvel** · 08-03-2008, 03:34 PM

Before the days of teh interweb, pr0n was a LITTLE BIT tougher to come by. Especially if you were a minor and/or had no money. People had to improvise. I once caught my little brother sneaking up to the treehouse with the underwear page of the JC Penney circular.

I guess my best non-pr0n pr0n was this "local real estate listings channel" on cable. It just showed bad videotaped pans across the rooms in houses for sale. THere was this one pair of agents who were (sorta) hot women. They would put themselves in the video doing the Vanna White gesture in the rooms like the showcase girls in the Price is Right. A couple of times I

to those ladies listings. Something about ladies in dresses with big hair sprawled out on a stranger's sectional sofa.

Come to think of it, I did also

to the Showcase chicks on TPIR. Especially when they were on the speedboat.

**Nzoner** · 08-03-2008, 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bwana

That's gold right there.

Thank you sir,I'm glad someone appreciated it

**DaneMcCloud** · 08-03-2008, 10:02 PM

Colin's Sleazy Friends was my first real exposure to porn.

I had always dated and hung with strippers and rock chicks so I never really had the need for porn in KC.

Once I moved to Los Angeles, I was exposed to the GREATEST public access cable show of ALL TIME, called "Colin's Sleazy Friends".

This total dirtbag named Colin Malone hosted a cable access show that was on every week He'd "interview" hot porn sluts and ask them questions like "Now, you just finished up with Harry Buttsex 5. Should I watch Harry Buttsex Episodes 1-4 so that I can keep up with the narrative?" To which the porn slut would undoubtedly reply "Yes! I think it would really help you to understand the story". Classic, comedy gold (except of course, the porn slut wasn't in on the joke!).

He'd usually end his show with said porn slut diddling herself in studio just after pole dancing or stripping. It was un-freakin'-real.

He became so popular that non-porn people like Janine Garofalo and Bob Odenkirk would show up and interview but those definitely took a backseat to the sluts.

Ironically, my girlfriend (now wife) worked briefly at Century Communications in Santa Monica and all the guys in the office would pass around and watch Colin's show on video tape the day after he taped it (it usually wasn't shown for another 6 days after taping).

Greatest. Public. Access. Show.

EVAR!!!!

**TinyEvel** · 08-03-2008, 10:48 PM

Haha Dane, I remember that show. but it actually made me sad, like too sleazy. Had I been into blow at the time I wold have really dug it, though.

redbrian · 08-03-2008, 10:53 PM

Old School here.....National Geograhic.........man that was some hot stuff...

**Predarat** · 08-03-2008, 10:53 PM

The JC Pennys and Sears catalogues, and there was this Carmen Electra video called Get On Up or something but that was damn near pron.

**DaneMcCloud** · 08-03-2008, 10:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinyEvel

Haha Dane, I remember that show. but it actually made me sad, like too sleazy. Had I been into blow at the time I wold have really dug it, though.

Never got into blow.

But Long Island Ice Tea's at the Rainbow certainly did the trick back in the day.

**TinyEvel** · 08-03-2008, 10:56 PM

Chris Rock had an awesome standup bit talking about he couldn't find any pr0n, so the only pic of a chick in his whole house was Aunt Jemimah on the Syrup bottle. Then he goes into a whole routine about spankin' it to Aunt Jemimah. "C'mon boy....whip that buttah for ol' Aunt Jemimah..oh yeah..."

That was a good bit!

**DaneMcCloud** · 08-03-2008, 10:59 PM

If I were to chose women outside of internet porn, I'd choose hairdressers.

They're usually hot, slutty and just one gene away from strippers.

Of course, I banged all those chicks, too.

Man, I'm ****ing bad.

Jewish Rabbi · 08-03-2008, 11:12 PM

My avatar

**TinyEvel** · 08-03-2008, 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

If I were to chose women outside of internet porn, I'd choose hairdressers.

They're usually hot, slutty and just one gene away from strippers.

Of course, I banged all those chicks, too.

Man, I'm ****ing bad.

I'm my own hairdresser (and....thread has come full circle. Mods, retire it please)

**DaneMcCloud** · 08-03-2008, 11:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinyEvel

I'm my own hairdresser (and....thread has come full circle. Mods, retire it please)

Uh...

08-03-2008, 03:34 PM
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $2229601	What's the most non-pr0nographic material you've used to..uh...spank it? Before the days of teh interweb, pr0n was a LITTLE BIT tougher to come by. Especially if you were a minor and/or had no money. People had to improvise. I once caught my little brother sneaking up to the treehouse with the underwear page of the JC Penney circular. I guess my best non-pr0n pr0n was this "local real estate listings channel" on cable. It just showed bad videotaped pans across the rooms in houses for sale. THere was this one pair of agents who were (sorta) hot women. They would put themselves in the video doing the Vanna White gesture in the rooms like the showcase girls in the Price is Right. A couple of times I to those ladies listings. Something about ladies in dresses with big hair sprawled out on a stranger's sectional sofa. Come to think of it, I did also to the Showcase chicks on TPIR. Especially when they were on the speedboat.
Posts: 12,324

08-03-2008, 10:02 PM	#47
DaneMcCloud Supporter Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Hollywood, CA Casino cash: $10053648	Colin's Sleazy Friends was my first real exposure to porn. I had always dated and hung with strippers and rock chicks so I never really had the need for porn in KC. Once I moved to Los Angeles, I was exposed to the GREATEST public access cable show of ALL TIME, called "Colin's Sleazy Friends". This total dirtbag named Colin Malone hosted a cable access show that was on every week He'd "interview" hot porn sluts and ask them questions like "Now, you just finished up with Harry Buttsex 5. Should I watch Harry Buttsex Episodes 1-4 so that I can keep up with the narrative?" To which the porn slut would undoubtedly reply "Yes! I think it would really help you to understand the story". Classic, comedy gold (except of course, the porn slut wasn't in on the joke!). He'd usually end his show with said porn slut diddling herself in studio just after pole dancing or stripping. It was un-freakin'-real. He became so popular that non-porn people like Janine Garofalo and Bob Odenkirk would show up and interview but those definitely took a backseat to the sluts. Ironically, my girlfriend (now wife) worked briefly at Century Communications in Santa Monica and all the guys in the office would pass around and watch Colin's show on video tape the day after he taped it (it usually wasn't shown for another 6 days after taping). Greatest. Public. Access. Show. EVAR!!!!
Posts: 88,960

08-03-2008, 10:48 PM	#48
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $2229601	Haha Dane, I remember that show. but it actually made me sad, like too sleazy. Had I been into blow at the time I wold have really dug it, though.
Posts: 12,324

08-03-2008, 10:53 PM	#49
redbrian Veteran Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Kansas City MO Casino cash: $10004900	Old School here.....National Geograhic.........man that was some hot stuff...
Posts: 3,899

08-03-2008, 10:53 PM	#50
Predarat Run Chiefs fans, run!! Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Nashville, TN Casino cash: $9963863	The JC Pennys and Sears catalogues, and there was this Carmen Electra video called Get On Up or something but that was damn near pron.
Posts: 10,776

08-03-2008, 10:56 PM	#52
TinyEvel Just a li'l Evel Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bald. Goatee. Jorts. Casino cash: $2229601	Chris Rock had an awesome standup bit talking about he couldn't find any pr0n, so the only pic of a chick in his whole house was Aunt Jemimah on the Syrup bottle. Then he goes into a whole routine about spankin' it to Aunt Jemimah. "C'mon boy....whip that buttah for ol' Aunt Jemimah..oh yeah..." That was a good bit!
Posts: 12,324

08-03-2008, 10:59 PM	#53
DaneMcCloud Supporter Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Hollywood, CA Casino cash: $10053648	If I were to chose women outside of internet porn, I'd choose hairdressers. They're usually hot, slutty and just one gene away from strippers. Of course, I banged all those chicks, too. Man, I'm ****ing bad.
Posts: 88,960

08-03-2008, 11:12 PM	#54
Jewish Rabbi What's up braj? Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Placencia, Belize Casino cash: $-1826750	My avatar
Posts: 16,959