Home and Auto I'm going to club a guy over the head with a jug of antifreeze.

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 06:53 PM

Given the low interest rates in these days of financial turmoil, I decided it was a good time to refinance my house. So we did. Easy.

As part of the process, we had to get an appraisal of the house, and the lender had it done. It came back and we were like, "What the -?".

I know that home prices are low right now, but this was ridiculous. So we started looking at the details. It turns out that the guy used a square footage that was 700 square feet smaller than our house, and somewhere along the line he also lopped off a bedroom and a bathroom.

Our house is three stories, and it was obvious that he had excluded the third floor from the square footage. I don't know what happened with the bedrooms since that hasn't changed for 100 years. We added a third bathroom twelve years ago.

So I sent the guy an exceedingly polite e-mail and said, "Hey, I think there's an error. You can go to the county assessor's web site and confirm the correct statistics on the house. Would you fix it, please?"

That was two weeks ago, and I got a call today from some low-level dweeb who said, "You're not right. We used public records to get our stats." I argued with said dweeb for a few minutes and finally said, "Give me your boss."

The appraiser got on the line and I asked what public records he used. He said he'd used MLS listings. He was quite defensive, and I said, "Dude. Seriously. Go to the assessor's web site. Look at the numbers. Your square footage isn't even right."

He said, "The lender is my client, so go through them if you want me to redo it. But I'll need to do a much more thorough interior appraisal."

Aha. So you undervalue my home and now you want me to go demand a bigger contract for you to fix it. I understand your game.

I said, "I can go to your client and embarrass the hell out of you, or you can fix it now. What do you want to do?" He said to go to his client.

I don't think his client is going to get the letter that he's hoping for. I'm turning that SOB in, and he's going to come out of it wishing that he had died in a fire.

Are assessors licensed? Maybe I'll write a letter to the state, too.

What has happened to this world? Does this guy think he's not going to get toasted over this? It's open and shut. It's not even like there's room for argument.

keg in kc · 01-09-2009, 06:56 PM

I totally read this as "I'm going to a gay club to get head".

And I'm not even drinking.

WTF.

**Buck** · 01-09-2009, 07:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

I totally read this as "I'm going to a gay club to get head".

And I'm not even drinking.

WTF.

I already tried that, it doesn't work.

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 07:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

I totally read this as "I'm going to a gay club to get head".

And I'm not even drinking.

WTF.

A psychologist could probably explain that, but you might not want him to.

teedubya · 01-09-2009, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc

I totally read this as "I'm going to a gay club to get head".

And I'm not even drinking.

WTF.

That made me belly laugh HARD. effin' hilarious

Delano · 01-09-2009, 07:01 PM

How did this guy assess the Pioli situation? You asked him, right?

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

How did this guy assess the Pioli situation? You asked him, right?

He thought Herm should be retained and promoted to GM/Coach.

**Buck** · 01-09-2009, 07:06 PM

This isn't someone from the same company that asked you for a favor back a few months ago, is it?

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckinKaeding

This isn't someone from the same company that asked you for a favor back a few months ago, is it?

Think not. We just developed an alliance with a competitor to that firm, though, so they're in our sights as they meander through the woods eating grass.

**DaneMcCloud** · 01-09-2009, 07:13 PM

You should have waited until June

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

You should have waited until June

Why? Is he a free agent then or something?

**DaneMcCloud** · 01-09-2009, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Why? Is he a free agent then or something?

I've got it on good authority (the Wall Street folks who told me about Wachovia, Lehman, etc. going under months in advance - the thread is in DC) that interest rates this summer will be at a record all-time low.

**Rain Man** · 01-09-2009, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

I've got it on good authority (the Wall Street folks who told me about Wachovia, Lehman, etc. going under months in advance - the thread is in DC) that interest rates this summer will be at a record all-time low.

You should've told me earlier. I'm going to write a letter to your boss now.

**DaneMcCloud** · 01-09-2009, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

You should've told me earlier. I'm going to write a letter to your boss now.

Considering I'm my boss, please send to attention: Dane McCloud

teedubya · 01-09-2009, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaneMcCloud

I've got it on good authority (the Wall Street folks who told me about Wachovia, Lehman, etc. going under months in advance - the thread is in DC) that interest rates this summer will be at a record all-time low.

Okay gang, as many of you know I still have friends at the highest level on Wall Street and have this info to share with full confidence: That interest rates this summer will be at a record all-time low. The announcement will come Thursday or Friday at the latest. The Wall Street folks who told me about Wachovia, Lehman, etc. are working out the finer points of his contract tonight (money & control), but the deal is sealed.

Mike Shanahan has contacted Wall St, but I don't know any info beyond that.

01-09-2009, 06:53 PM	Topic Starter
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-682449 VARSITY	I'm going to club a guy over the head with a jug of antifreeze. Given the low interest rates in these days of financial turmoil, I decided it was a good time to refinance my house. So we did. Easy. As part of the process, we had to get an appraisal of the house, and the lender had it done. It came back and we were like, "What the -?". I know that home prices are low right now, but this was ridiculous. So we started looking at the details. It turns out that the guy used a square footage that was 700 square feet smaller than our house, and somewhere along the line he also lopped off a bedroom and a bathroom. Our house is three stories, and it was obvious that he had excluded the third floor from the square footage. I don't know what happened with the bedrooms since that hasn't changed for 100 years. We added a third bathroom twelve years ago. So I sent the guy an exceedingly polite e-mail and said, "Hey, I think there's an error. You can go to the county assessor's web site and confirm the correct statistics on the house. Would you fix it, please?" That was two weeks ago, and I got a call today from some low-level dweeb who said, "You're not right. We used public records to get our stats." I argued with said dweeb for a few minutes and finally said, "Give me your boss." The appraiser got on the line and I asked what public records he used. He said he'd used MLS listings. He was quite defensive, and I said, "Dude. Seriously. Go to the assessor's web site. Look at the numbers. Your square footage isn't even right." He said, "The lender is my client, so go through them if you want me to redo it. But I'll need to do a much more thorough interior appraisal." Aha. So you undervalue my home and now you want me to go demand a bigger contract for you to fix it. I understand your game. I said, "I can go to your client and embarrass the hell out of you, or you can fix it now. What do you want to do?" He said to go to his client. I don't think his client is going to get the letter that he's hoping for. I'm turning that SOB in, and he's going to come out of it wishing that he had died in a fire. Are assessors licensed? Maybe I'll write a letter to the state, too. What has happened to this world? Does this guy think he's not going to get toasted over this? It's open and shut. It's not even like there's room for argument.
Posts: 145,516

01-09-2009, 06:56 PM	#2
keg in kc oxymoron Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: OP/KC/Whatever Casino cash: $9556299	I totally read this as "I'm going to a gay club to get head". And I'm not even drinking. WTF.
Posts: 58,682

01-09-2009, 07:01 PM	#6
Delano [b]Supporter[/b] Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: A Hypnagogic Landscape Casino cash: $7675015	How did this guy assess the Pioli situation? You asked him, right? __________________ A million CPilgrims face Mecca. Think of the power behind that fact. All logging in now. And bending. And praying. ChiefsPlanet is the angle at which realities meet. - Don DeLillo
Posts: 13,029

01-09-2009, 07:06 PM	#8
Buck Take a Chill Pill Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South Carolina Casino cash: $5990295	This isn't someone from the same company that asked you for a favor back a few months ago, is it?
Posts: 44,606

01-09-2009, 07:13 PM	#10
DaneMcCloud Supporter Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Hollywood, CA Casino cash: $10053648	You should have waited until June
Posts: 88,960