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Old 01-03-2009, 07:24 PM  
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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The Hard Way
Like many of you, for some unknown reason, I've had to learn many, many lessons the hard way.

Someone tells you not to do something, but you just have to anyway.....

Share those stories and the lesson learned.
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Old 01-05-2009, 02:54 PM   #61
2112 2112 is offline
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Last March I went to New Orleans with some friends to partake in a pre st pattys day bar crawl parade/vacation. I get there at 11am on a Thursday and we have lunch and then make a decision, do we do some volunteer work or start drinking? my vote was to start drinking.

Anyhow, we start doing shots of Jameson and drinking beers at 1pm. I didn't eat dinner for some odd reason that night and wound up blacking out. all I remembered was going up the elevator in the wrong hotel and that my passport and wallet were missing but I had all my cash. so I slept on it and try putting together the loose ends the next morning.

I wake up on Friday and have a serious problem. no ID or anything and I have to fly back to NJ on Monday. I have my brother fed ex me a copy of birth certificate and have work email me scan of drivers license. then I call New Orleans PD and ask for police report so I can travel with all 3 on Monday, NO PD laughs at me and says that will take 45 days to get a police report. WTF?

Fast forward to Saturday. I have a blinking light on my phone in my hotel room. it's from a cab driver named Chris saying he has all my shit. I told him to come to my hotel and I'll take care of him. I gave him $100 and thanked him and then asked ''wtf happened that night, fill me in''. he said I was stumbling and bumbling through the french quarter and asked him if I could get a ride, he said sure, where to? I say ''I don't know''. I was staying at the old queens hotel across canal street. he drives by the omni hotel and I say that's my hotel, so that's how I went up the elevator in the wrong hotel. I was lucky I didn't get ****ing robbed, what a dumbass I was that day.


Anyway, the moral of the story is to always make sure to eat well if you're gonna get shit faced. I canceled my ****ing passport that had 7 years left on it
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2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.2112 is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 03:47 PM   #62
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Apparently, my microwave IQ is below 75.

So....given the recent disaster with the dumpty family in mind.....

I've been out to meetings, no lunch yada yada yada....zip in the house, fling a bag of orville Redenbacher in the M-wave and hit 3 minutes...go check email.

Somethign isn't right when I get back down.....

I'd thrown the bag on top of that plastic bowl thingamajig that goes over plates to keep it from splattering.

The entire center of that is melted and gone....stuck to the bag.

Lesson.
Don't put a bag of popcorn on top of the plastic dish.

I must have my head seriously in my ass this week....
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Last edited by Iowanian; 01-05-2009 at 03:58 PM..
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Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 03:48 PM   #63
Mr. Plow Mr. Plow is offline
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Have you recently put your head in the microwave?
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Old 01-05-2009, 03:49 PM   #64
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by D2112 View Post
Sounds like brideowanian has never gotten dutch ovened if she asked you to make those eggs. it would have been a good life lesson for her if your innards work like mine under pressure with hard boiled or pickled eggs.
She was very much against the idea of my selection for that meal.


If you read my social commentary thread....you'd know that I'm a pickled egg stuntman.
search and learn.


plow.
maybe I've stood too close or something. I'm on some new stuff thats making me feel a little off this week, but didn't know it made me mentally challenged.
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Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 04:01 PM   #65
MIAdragon MIAdragon is offline
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Originally Posted by Skip Towne View Post
You got that out of Penthouse letters didn't you?
Unfortunately not, that’s all me. Not one of my finer moments. I can honestly say I’ve never cracked open that mag.
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Old 01-05-2009, 04:05 PM   #66
Mark M Mark M is offline
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Stay of execution.

The good news is, the fussing/teething young one, and the splashing drowned out the sound of the blast. I've scrubbed the egg guts off of everything, run ice and bleech through the disposal afterwards...

The bad news.....a few squirts of fabreeze airspray doesn't remove the stench of the death of the Dumpty family.

I knew I was screwed with 3yroldowanian came hopping into the kitchen as I put the finishing touches on and said "something stinks, clear upstairs".

She's giving a bottle to youngestowanian.....and I'll read to oldestchildowanian soon and wait for my beating.

Maybe I'll run and go to my brothers....
Wait a minute -- you had kids?!?! Sweet Jesus H. Riverdancing Christ ...



Hmmm ... things I've learned the hard way:

5. Gravity.

4. Newton's second law.

3. Never say to a boss you hate: "What are you going to do, fire me?"

2. How to unfasten a bra (I was a freshman in college before I learned to do it with a snap. Kinda embarassing before that, so all you youngins need to practice.)

And the most important lesson I learned the hard way:

1. Unless you are honestly trying to have kids, wear a rubber. Always. Even if she says she's on the pill. She may not be, and child support is expensive.

Hope some of this helps ...

MM
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Old 01-05-2009, 04:42 PM   #67
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Cocaine is a helluva drug.
You get to fall in love more than once.
Killing sucks.
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Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 04:48 PM   #68
chasedude chasedude is offline
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One thing I found out the hard way...

Don't fry bacon naked!
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chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.chasedude wants to die in a aids tree fire.
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Old 01-05-2009, 04:54 PM   #69
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Beer before Liquor.....
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Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.Iowanian is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 05:00 PM   #70
DaneMcCloud DaneMcCloud is offline
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Killing sucks.
Not if you're paid for it
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Old 01-05-2009, 05:11 PM   #71
Demonpenz Demonpenz is offline
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sometimes that last pringle is just not worth it
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Old 01-05-2009, 06:32 PM   #72
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Not if you're paid for it
Charge for the killing!
Give the sex for free!

Dammit. I had it backwards.
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Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 06:32 PM   #73
Katipan Katipan is offline
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sometimes that last pringle is just not worth it
Example please.
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Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Katipan is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-05-2009, 06:39 PM   #74
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Unless you like cold shoulder and sharp tongue for dinner every night for the next month.
Never ever call your wife / gf a "dimpley assed b!tch".

If you usually get a piece of ass and 2 shirts from the Mrs. and your 2 kids for christmas / birthday never complain about all 3 gifts being 2 sizes too big.

Some women do not hit like a girl. If she makes a fist and "throws" a punch it's going to hurt.
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Old 01-05-2009, 06:41 PM   #75
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A lesson learned the hard way?

No matter how lovely the lady, mixing sex and hallucinogenic mushrooms is a VERY bad idea.
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