Life This sucks at 58 - Page 6

Monk · 04-28-2009, 07:15 PM

I normally don't post on here,but damn I need to vent. I have (had) been married to the same woman for over 35 years. Never a major problem in our relationship. Five weeks ago she informs me she wants a divorce as she has met someone and wants something different in her life.

I worked 25 years for Williams Energy, we put two daughters through college and helped them, as we could, get established in life.

So,today was a meeting between the lawyers and I find out I will have to give her the house (paid for ) a car (new) and 1/2 of my pension,savings, and investments. Now all of that was ours 50/50 any way and she did her part in the marriage. Not only does it hurt like hell but now it looks like at 58 I have to start all over again.

Sorry for spelling or grammer but right now I don't care my heart is broken and soon to be homeless (STARTING OVER AT 58 )

**Bwana** · 04-28-2009, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monk

Thanks BWANA, I will. But right now, well, right now I feel like the only thing I was able to accomplish in life was raising two beautiful daughters. And trust me they are worth it

Well I'll tell you what, that's something to be very pround of. Just remember, your life is a long way from being over. You have a lot of time left, make the choice to make the best of it and treat yourself to some fun and live your dreams bud. Like I said, it may seem hard to see it right now while you're in the center of this, but it WILL get better.

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lumpy

That really sucks. Listen, hop in the car, drive to the nearest liquor store, and buy a bottle of Glenlivet (aged 12 yrs plus). I bought that for my husband and he raves about it! Good luck to u Monk.

Thanks Lumpy as a matter of fact that is what I drink

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delano

Did she respond poorly to an empty nest or something?

Yes she did

**kysirsoze** · 04-28-2009, 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts

Sorry to hear about your losses. I'd suggest The Macallan.

BINGO!!!

Jenson71 · 04-28-2009, 08:06 PM

Now is the perfect time to spend a season ranching cattle and going to rodeos and sleeping under the stars. Or spending a few months in a monastery in prayer and meditation. Something like that.

Also, get a dog if you don't have one already. Without one you will die sooner.

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts

By the way, if your wife has left you for another man that's adultry. You contest it, you should come out on top financially.

Apparently does not matter to the court

**luv** · 04-28-2009, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AustinChief

That is really really good for you. Did she physically move out? Is she living with the other guy?

Living with another man while still technically married? Hmmm.

And how can her leaving for another man be considered "no fault"?

**Bwana** · 04-28-2009, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HMc

i'd liquidate everything, hide the money in belize, then tell them all to get fkd - you gambled the money away.

If he decides to do that, he better send me a PM. I know a few places in Belize where that would work. Lot's of decent investments over there right now on San Pedro Island.

burt · 04-28-2009, 08:09 PM

It sucks at 48 also.

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luv

Living with another man while still technically married? Hmmm.

And how can her leaving for another man be considered "no fault"?

Yes Yes and Yes

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AustinChief

Ok here is the long and short of it.

#1 Colorado has some F-ed up laws...
#2 Based on what I have read so far... the "standard" for CO would be for you to split the house and pay her temporary Alimony
#3 I am assuming they are trying to take ALL of the house in lieu of any alimony (bullshit!)
#4 All lawyers suck and are lazy. Period. if your attorney is highly regarded, that just means she may actually work 20 real hours a week and may actually give a shit and THINK during 2 of those. They are as unethical as automechanics and as unreliable as doctors... so, please get at least ONE other opinion before you agree to something as life changing as your final divorce decree.

(Apologies to any lawyers, docotrs or mechanics... hyperbole needed for point...)

Thank you very much that is good advice

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monk

Thank you very much that is good advice

Yes it would be a final settlemnt, the house, car and half of everything else for no further obligations

RJ · 04-28-2009, 08:18 PM

Hey Monk, what do you enjoy in life outside of the day to day shit?

**AustinChief** · 04-28-2009, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monk

Apparently does not matter to the court

Correct. Unfortunately, marital conduct RARELY affects division of property. BUT her living with the other man CAn have an effect.

Colorado goes by "equitable division" of property... basically they factor everything in and try to make it "fair" for everyone.

Her having a place to live and a job to support herself helps you immensely. She is entitled to 50% of everything aquired DURING the marriage and even temporary alimony if she earns significantly less than you... but if she is dead set on getting the house... she needs to give up part of her claims elsewhere... I can't imagine a competent lawyer allowing you to take the initial offer... it is ridiculous.

Monk · 04-28-2009, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AustinChief

Correct. Unfortunately, marital conduct RARELY affects division of property. BUT her living with the other man CAn have an effect.

Colorado goes by "equitable division" of property... basically they factor everything in and try to make it "fair" for everyone.

Her having a place to live and a job to support herself helps you immensely. She is entitled to 50% of everything aquired DURING the marriage and even temporary alimony if she earns significantly less than you... but if she is dead set on getting the house... she needs to give up part of her claims elsewhere... I can't imagine a competent lawyer allowing you to take the initial offer... it is ridiculous.

Again thank you so much, I believe I will check around for a different lawyer

04-28-2009, 07:15 PM
Monk Starter Join Date: Aug 2001 Casino cash: $10004900	This sucks at 58 I normally don't post on here,but damn I need to vent. I have (had) been married to the same woman for over 35 years. Never a major problem in our relationship. Five weeks ago she informs me she wants a divorce as she has met someone and wants something different in her life. I worked 25 years for Williams Energy, we put two daughters through college and helped them, as we could, get established in life. So,today was a meeting between the lawyers and I find out I will have to give her the house (paid for ) a car (new) and 1/2 of my pension,savings, and investments. Now all of that was ours 50/50 any way and she did her part in the marriage. Not only does it hurt like hell but now it looks like at 58 I have to start all over again. Sorry for spelling or grammer but right now I don't care my heart is broken and soon to be homeless (STARTING OVER AT 58 )
Posts: 54

04-28-2009, 08:06 PM	#80
Jenson71 fides quaerens intellectum Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: United States Casino cash: $8330900	Now is the perfect time to spend a season ranching cattle and going to rodeos and sleeping under the stars. Or spending a few months in a monastery in prayer and meditation. Something like that. Also, get a dog if you don't have one already. Without one you will die sooner.
Posts: 15,986

04-28-2009, 08:18 PM	#88
RJ Supporter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: In a shotgun shack Casino cash: $9895202	Hey Monk, what do you enjoy in life outside of the day to day shit?
Posts: 14,940