Life If slavery was legal... - Page 5

**Rain Man** · 09-01-2009, 08:15 PM

Hypothetical situation here, and I'll start by apologizing in advance to every African American person on the board if you want me to.

Background:

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE.

In order to help pay for a new stimulus package that provides big-screen TVs, unlimited 7-11 Big Gulps, and liposuction for every American, Obama's wacky science advisor re-establishes slavery in the United States. Every American draws a random number and 30 percent (those drawing a number ending in a 2, 4 or 7 if you're interested) will become slaves. So the slave population will contain people of all education levels, ages, genders, and yes, all races. Those slaves are then placed for sale by the government in a controlled auction environment.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY.

You and all of your friends and relatives and friendly coworkers draw safe numbers, so you don't have to worry about anyone you know.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE.

All laws are rewritten so that owning slaves is legal, generally along the lines of the year 1850. There is no social stigma to being a slaveowner, as it is condoned by nearly all daytime TV talk shows as well as Comedy Central, FOX News, and National Public Radio (though NPR suggests donating them to NPR in your will). The Constitution is amended to allow it, so it's not going anywhere in your lifetime.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT.

Based on about five minutes of research, it appears that the price for a slave in 1850, if inflated to today's dollars, would range from about $15,000 for someone with flaws (advanced age, health, etc.), to about $50,000 for an average slave, to about $95,000 for a top-notch, good-looking, prime-of-life slave.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING.

Recall that you would be responsible for all of this person's expenses and upkeep, including housing, health care, food, etc. However, in return you get...well...the person. Free labor for the remainder of the person's natural life, and no saying no to anything.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING. NO RACE TALK.

Much like a car, an interested buyer can shop around and buy a person who seems like the best value according to their own criteria.

Be honest. Would you buy one?

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING. NO RACE TALK. NONE.

And I'll finish by apologizing to any African Americans on the board if you want me to.

greg63 · 09-02-2009, 12:49 AM

Valiant · 09-02-2009, 12:51 AM

voted no, and do not need one..

Slavery had its time and place in the past.. There is or would be no reason to have them again..

Probably would have been better to sub slaves for: criminals that are in for life, have been neutered and a tracking chip placed in them that helps controls behaviors.. You would probably have gotten more yes's..

**Rausch** · 09-02-2009, 01:22 AM

Only if I knew I was getting a frenchman, that way it would be guiltless...

**Rausch** · 09-02-2009, 01:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dottefan

Could we buy Canadians as slaves...I always wanted to own a Canadian( not meaning the code word that you use for black people, that you think we dont know about..whitey lol) ...

Ok, but don't think we haven't cought on to a brother "sniffing" around a sweating whitey. Yeah, we know you think we smell like wet dogs...

KCChiefsMan · 09-02-2009, 01:30 AM

is this a poll where people can view your answers? I want to know if I should answer them honestly or not

**Rausch** · 09-02-2009, 01:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KCChiefsMan

is this a poll where people can view your answers? I want to know if I should answer them honestly or not

Dude, we already know yer' a racist.
Does being an azzhole as well really matter?

KCChiefsMan · 09-02-2009, 01:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rausch

Dude, we already know yer' a racist.
Does being an azzhole as well really matter?

I was only kidding dude. What do you mean "we already know yer' a racist." I am not, I know it's hard to sense sarcasm in a forum, but seriously.

googlegoogle · 09-02-2009, 01:49 AM

**Rausch** · 09-02-2009, 01:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by googlegoogle

If I said I'd like her to be my slave would that make me racist?
(Oh, and is it just me or does she have a voice like an 80 year old male smoker?)

SenselessChiefsFan · 09-02-2009, 06:09 AM

This got me thinking..... a great way to take care of the homeless population.... sell them as slaves.

I mean, we would have to have rules on it. You know, similar to the amount hours college students are allowed to play football.... so, I am sure that no one would abuse the power.

But, you can have them do whatever you need done. Then, you have to house them in acceptable living conditions and feed them.

Heck, we could solve health care this way too. All the people who don't have health care could be sold off as slaves and the slave owners could put them on their own health insurance policy.

Man, you know, now that I think about it.... slavery is that answer to all our problems.

Of course the democrats have been trying to get us all on the plantation for a while....

beach tribe · 09-02-2009, 06:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SensibleChiefsfan

This got me thinking..... a great way to take care of the homeless population.... sell them as slaves.

I mean, we would have to have rules on it. You know, similar to the amount hours college students are allowed to play football.... so, I am sure that no one would abuse the power.

But, you can have them do whatever you need done. Then, you have to house them in acceptable living conditions and feed them.

Heck, we could solve health care this way too. All the people who don't have health care could be sold off as slaves and the slave owners could put them on their own health insurance policy.

Man, you know, now that I think about it.... slavery is that answer to all our problems.

Of course the democrats have been trying to get us all on the plantation for a while....

The homeless thing is almost a good Idea. Only, homeless people are usually that way, because they don't want to work, so.....

LaChapelle · 09-02-2009, 06:59 AM

Their accessed value is the schools ticket to the land of luxury.

Inspector · 09-02-2009, 06:59 AM

Not interested in getting into the cotton business.

modocsot · 09-02-2009, 07:21 AM

In today's day-and-age, the issue of slavery would expand beyond race. More so, owning slaves in modern times would be related to socioeconomic elitism, I believe. With that said however, lower economic class largely encompasses racial minorities in America; thus the attention of public perception will be first pointed at race.

This snowball rolling down a steep hill gets larger, as you deny a specific class of people the opportunity to better themselves through education etc., thus locking generations of their class into servitude.

To willfully take possession of another human being's freedom and liberties, regardless of their race, class or creed, is disgusting in these modern times. Just my .02.

**Bob Dole** · 09-02-2009, 07:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LaChapelle

Their accessed value is the schools ticket to the land of luxury.

This post is likely to cause a strange change reaction...

View Poll Results: See Rules Below. Would you buy one?
Part 1. Would you buy one or more?	3	4.35%
Yes	20	28.99%
No	37	53.62%
Unsure.	3	4.35%
Part 2. If yes, why? Select the ONE main reason.	3	4.35%
It seems like a good economic investment.	9	13.04%
I could use the help.	12	17.39%
I would relish the absolute power.	4	5.80%
Other reason. See my explanation below.	1	1.45%
Part 3. If no, why not? Select the ONE main reason.	2	2.90%
I couldn't afford one.	8	11.59%
I don't need one.	8	11.59%
Slavery is wrong! WRONG! What kind of demented poll is this?	30	43.48%
Other reason. See my explanation below.	5	7.25%
Part 4. If unsure, why are you unsure? Select the ONE main reason.	2	2.90%
It seems wrong, but wow, it'd be soooo handy.	6	8.70%
I'd really like to know more about the shopping process.	2	2.90%
I'm not sure how history would judge me.	0	0%
I'm afraid of what I would do with absolute power, but I relish it.	1	1.45%
I'm not sure it's really a good deal, what with all this health care reform stuff and taxes.	1	1.45%
I'm unsure why I'm unsure.	0	0%
Other reason. See my explanation below.	3	4.35%
Part 5. Required apologies	3	4.35%
I'm checking this box as an apology for even thinking about this.	25	36.23%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 69. You may not vote on this poll

09-01-2009, 08:15 PM
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-682449 VARSITY	If slavery was legal... Hypothetical situation here, and I'll start by apologizing in advance to every African American person on the board if you want me to. Background: NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. In order to help pay for a new stimulus package that provides big-screen TVs, unlimited 7-11 Big Gulps, and liposuction for every American, Obama's wacky science advisor re-establishes slavery in the United States. Every American draws a random number and 30 percent (those drawing a number ending in a 2, 4 or 7 if you're interested) will become slaves. So the slave population will contain people of all education levels, ages, genders, and yes, all races. Those slaves are then placed for sale by the government in a controlled auction environment. NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. You and all of your friends and relatives and friendly coworkers draw safe numbers, so you don't have to worry about anyone you know. NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. All laws are rewritten so that owning slaves is legal, generally along the lines of the year 1850. There is no social stigma to being a slaveowner, as it is condoned by nearly all daytime TV talk shows as well as Comedy Central, FOX News, and National Public Radio (though NPR suggests donating them to NPR in your will). The Constitution is amended to allow it, so it's not going anywhere in your lifetime. NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. Based on about five minutes of research, it appears that the price for a slave in 1850, if inflated to today's dollars, would range from about $15,000 for someone with flaws (advanced age, health, etc.), to about $50,000 for an average slave, to about $95,000 for a top-notch, good-looking, prime-of-life slave. NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING. Recall that you would be responsible for all of this person's expenses and upkeep, including housing, health care, food, etc. However, in return you get...well...the person. Free labor for the remainder of the person's natural life, and no saying no to anything. NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING. NO RACE TALK. Much like a car, an interested buyer can shop around and buy a person who seems like the best value according to their own criteria. Be honest. Would you buy one? NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RACE THING. DON'T TALK ABOUT RACE. SERIOUSLY. DON'T EVEN GO THERE. I MEAN IT. I'M NOT KIDDING. NO RACE TALK. NONE. And I'll finish by apologizing to any African Americans on the board if you want me to.
Posts: 145,512

09-02-2009, 12:49 AM	#61
greg63 Homer go crazy!!! Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: SE Kansas Casino cash: $6403990	No. __________________
Posts: 19,374

09-02-2009, 12:51 AM	#62
Valiant Valiant 'The Thread Killer' Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Kansas City Casino cash: $4522380	voted no, and do not need one.. Slavery had its time and place in the past.. There is or would be no reason to have them again.. Probably would have been better to sub slaves for: criminals that are in for life, have been neutered and a tracking chip placed in them that helps controls behaviors.. You would probably have gotten more yes's..
Posts: 18,558

09-02-2009, 01:30 AM	#65
KCChiefsMan AIC Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: West Roxbury, MA Casino cash: $10004900	is this a poll where people can view your answers? I want to know if I should answer them honestly or not
Posts: 11,478

09-02-2009, 01:49 AM	#68
googlegoogle Banned Join Date: Nov 2008 Casino cash: $10004900
Posts: 4,700

09-02-2009, 06:09 AM	#70
SenselessChiefsFan MVP Join Date: Nov 2008 Casino cash: $10005450	This got me thinking..... a great way to take care of the homeless population.... sell them as slaves. I mean, we would have to have rules on it. You know, similar to the amount hours college students are allowed to play football.... so, I am sure that no one would abuse the power. But, you can have them do whatever you need done. Then, you have to house them in acceptable living conditions and feed them. Heck, we could solve health care this way too. All the people who don't have health care could be sold off as slaves and the slave owners could put them on their own health insurance policy. Man, you know, now that I think about it.... slavery is that answer to all our problems. Of course the democrats have been trying to get us all on the plantation for a while....
Posts: 5,540

09-02-2009, 06:59 AM	#72
LaChapelle Banned Join Date: Mar 2009 Casino cash: $10004900	Their accessed value is the schools ticket to the land of luxury.
Posts: 8,588

09-02-2009, 06:59 AM	#73
Inspector MVP Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: K.C. Casino cash: $9914975	Not interested in getting into the cotton business. __________________ As always, this is IMO.
Posts: 7,917

09-02-2009, 07:21 AM	#74
modocsot Starter Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Jax, FL (Southbank) Casino cash: $3889244	In today's day-and-age, the issue of slavery would expand beyond race. More so, owning slaves in modern times would be related to socioeconomic elitism, I believe. With that said however, lower economic class largely encompasses racial minorities in America; thus the attention of public perception will be first pointed at race. This snowball rolling down a steep hill gets larger, as you deny a specific class of people the opportunity to better themselves through education etc., thus locking generations of their class into servitude. To willfully take possession of another human being's freedom and liberties, regardless of their race, class or creed, is disgusting in these modern times. Just my .02.
Posts: 252