|
![]() |
#61 |
Reset
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Parts Unknown
Casino cash: $6866765
|
Last March I went to New Orleans with some friends to partake in a pre st pattys day bar crawl parade/vacation. I get there at 11am on a Thursday and we have lunch and then make a decision, do we do some volunteer work or start drinking? my vote was to start drinking.
Anyhow, we start doing shots of Jameson and drinking beers at 1pm. I didn't eat dinner for some odd reason that night and wound up blacking out. all I remembered was going up the elevator in the wrong hotel and that my passport and wallet were missing but I had all my cash. so I slept on it and try putting together the loose ends the next morning. I wake up on Friday and have a serious problem. no ID or anything and I have to fly back to NJ on Monday. I have my brother fed ex me a copy of birth certificate and have work email me scan of drivers license. then I call New Orleans PD and ask for police report so I can travel with all 3 on Monday, NO PD laughs at me and says that will take 45 days to get a police report. WTF? ![]() Fast forward to Saturday. I have a blinking light on my phone in my hotel room. it's from a cab driver named Chris saying he has all my shit. I told him to come to my hotel and I'll take care of him. I gave him $100 and thanked him and then asked ''wtf happened that night, fill me in''. he said I was stumbling and bumbling through the french quarter and asked him if I could get a ride, he said sure, where to? I say ''I don't know''. I was staying at the old queens hotel across canal street. he drives by the omni hotel and I say that's my hotel, so that's how I went up the elevator in the wrong hotel. I was lucky I didn't get ****ing robbed, what a dumbass I was that day. Anyway, the moral of the story is to always make sure to eat well if you're gonna get shit faced. I canceled my ****ing passport that had 7 years left on it ![]() |
Posts: 22,280
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#62 |
Supporter
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Utopia
Casino cash: $1668454
|
Apparently, my microwave IQ is below 75.
So....given the recent disaster with the dumpty family in mind..... I've been out to meetings, no lunch yada yada yada....zip in the house, fling a bag of orville Redenbacher in the M-wave and hit 3 minutes...go check email. Somethign isn't right when I get back down..... I'd thrown the bag on top of that plastic bowl thingamajig that goes over plates to keep it from splattering. The entire center of that is melted and gone....stuck to the bag. Lesson. Don't put a bag of popcorn on top of the plastic dish. I must have my head seriously in my ass this week.... Last edited by Iowanian; 01-05-2009 at 03:58 PM.. |
Posts: 62,945
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#63 |
In Search of a Life
Join Date: Dec 2005
Casino cash: $-1512609
|
Have you recently put your head in the microwave?
|
Posts: 31,695
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#64 | |
Supporter
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Utopia
Casino cash: $1668454
|
Quote:
If you read my social commentary thread....you'd know that I'm a pickled egg stuntman. search and learn. plow. maybe I've stood too close or something. I'm on some new stuff thats making me feel a little off this week, but didn't know it made me mentally challenged. |
|
Posts: 62,945
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#65 |
Someone pass the antifreeze
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Miami (North Cuba)
Casino cash: $-2212181
|
![]() Last edited by MIAdragon; 01-05-2009 at 04:07 PM.. |
Posts: 15,944
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#66 | |
What time is it?
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: You tell me ...
Casino cash: $9884900
|
Quote:
![]() Hmmm ... things I've learned the hard way: 5. Gravity. 4. Newton's second law. 3. Never say to a boss you hate: "What are you going to do, fire me?" 2. How to unfasten a bra (I was a freshman in college before I learned to do it with a snap. Kinda embarassing before that, so all you youngins need to practice.) And the most important lesson I learned the hard way: 1. Unless you are honestly trying to have kids, wear a rubber. Always. Even if she says she's on the pill. She may not be, and child support is expensive. Hope some of this helps ... MM ~~ ![]() ![]()
__________________
ChiefsPlanet -- n. The place where brilliant minds assemble to willfully pool ignorance with questionable logic in order to reach absurd conclusions. |
|
Posts: 4,687
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#67 |
MER
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Colorado
Casino cash: $-969649
![]() |
Cocaine is a helluva drug.
You get to fall in love more than once. Killing sucks. |
Posts: 23,653
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#68 |
Supporter
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: St. Joe
Casino cash: $9994900
|
One thing I found out the hard way...
Don't fry bacon naked! |
Posts: 36,287
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#69 |
Supporter
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Utopia
Casino cash: $1668454
|
Beer before Liquor.....
|
Posts: 62,945
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#70 |
Supporter
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hollywood, CA
Casino cash: $10053648
|
|
Posts: 88,960
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#71 |
Woman should only make babies
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Apartment "G UNIT!"
Casino cash: $-403864
|
sometimes that last pringle is just not worth it
__________________
![]() |
Posts: 54,957
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#72 |
MER
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Colorado
Casino cash: $-969649
![]() |
|
Posts: 23,653
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#73 |
MER
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Colorado
Casino cash: $-969649
![]() |
|
Posts: 23,653
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#74 |
New and Improved
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Springfield, Mo.
Casino cash: $-2391410
|
Unless you like cold shoulder and sharp tongue for dinner every night for the next month.
Never ever call your wife / gf a "dimpley assed b!tch". If you usually get a piece of ass and 2 shirts from the Mrs. and your 2 kids for christmas / birthday never complain about all 3 gifts being 2 sizes too big. Some women do not hit like a girl. If she makes a fist and "throws" a punch it's going to hurt.
__________________
“As a nation, we can endure damaging policies for a four-year term. But we cannot survive a president willing to terminate our Constitution”
|
Posts: 22,356
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#75 |
Obligatory Thoughtcriminal
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Flux,awaiting an observer
Casino cash: $10004900
|
A lesson learned the hard way?
No matter how lovely the lady, mixing sex and hallucinogenic mushrooms is a VERY bad idea.
__________________
No matter how cynical you are, it is impossible to keep up. -Lily Tomlin I'd rather be a climbing monkey than a falling angel. -Terry Pratchett |
Posts: 14,305
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]() ![]() |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|