Worst Movies Evar

[Saccopoo]

The Megan Fox thread got me to thinking...what are your personal "worst" movies you've ever seen?

Here's my top five right off the top of my head:

1. Crank
- And Statham was so good in Snatch. WTF happened to that guy? This movie is a trainwreck of epic proportions. I'm getting physically sick just thinking about this pail of warm spit.

2. Nothing But Trouble
- No words to discribe how bad this piece of shit is as Dan Ackroyd builds up his acting resume with this triumphant followup to his Oscar worthy performance in Caddyshack 2. Everyone associated with this movie should be killed.

3. Clerks 2
- Why does Kevin Smith even make movies? He's like a really bad Quentin Tarrantino, and that's saying a lot (or very little). Blew his wad on the original Clerks and has treated us with calamities such as this ever since.

4. Any Given Sunday
- See #3 for description on Oliver Stone. The fact that he is actually putting out Wallstreet 2: Money Never Sleeps, put out Alexander and this steaming pile of monkey shit. I mean, when was the last time anyone played NFL football in the dark? Probably the last time Al Pacino didn't mail it in on a movie. HOOOHAAA! Al. Hoohaa indeed.

5. Righteous Kill
- Pacino. DeNiro. It's got to be great, right? OMG. They didn't even put a stamp on the letter to mail it in for this lump of festering goat bile. And next time, remember to get a stand in double for anytime you are being filmed trying to throw a ball or run Bobby. I mean, shit. Who would of thought that DeNiro throws like a girl. An old, wrinkled up sissy armed girl who runs like a hobbled 89 year old lady in six inch stilettos.

[KcMizzou]

(Going way back...)

Most overrated... "Out of Africa"

Holy hell, what a snooze-fest that was.

[Easy 6]

'nuff said.

Posts: 98,536

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

I'm still trying to figure out what Rob Lowe was saying in that heavy speech about whatever the hell St Elmos Fire was. Such deep meaning you know can be learned from the angst of 22 year old Georgetown graduates. And has Andie McDowell been in one decent movie??
Posted via Mobile Device

That was absolutely one of the dumbest ****ing movie speeches to ever waste celluloid.
That movie was so ****ing bad, all I remember is Lowe pretending to play saxophone and Moore's character doing coke.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

Fresh Horses. Rich Andrew McCarthy is in love with the georgeous (?) Poor, ****ed up, living in a shack by a train track, Molly Ringwald. I always thought the title was a description of Ringwald.
Posted via Mobile Device

The movie of him banging Rob Lowe's mom was okay.

[88TG88]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

When I think of the worst movies ever, I exclude those that are so bad that they're entertaining, and would include those that are bad in a way that they're uncomfortable to watch and make you embarrassed for the people who made them. My list off the top of my head would be (in no particular order):

The Cook, the Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover
Ice Pirates
Kika
Starship Troopers
That Woody Allen movie with Scarlet Johansen where Woody Allen's acting and writing was embarrassingly bad.

Starship Troopers had boobies so that makes up for teh suck.

[Pioli Zombie]

Hot Dog: The Movie. Only one decent line. "What the Fruck is "Chinese downhill?". The rest was a big steaming pile of dogshit.
Posted via Mobile Device

[Chiefless]

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

I'm still trying to figure out what Rob Lowe was saying in that heavy speech about whatever the hell St Elmos Fire was. Such deep meaning you know can be learned from the angst of 22 year old Georgetown graduates. And has Andie McDowell been in one decent movie??
Posted via Mobile Device

Groundhog Day?

[Chiefless]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

When I think of the worst movies ever, I exclude those that are so bad that they're entertaining, and would include those that are bad in a way that they're uncomfortable to watch and make you embarrassed for the people who made them. My list off the top of my head would be (in no particular order):

The Cook, the Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover
Ice Pirates
Kika
Starship Troopers
That Woody Allen movie with Scarlet Johansen where Woody Allen's acting and writing was embarrassingly bad.

Really?

[Deberg_1990]

Stallone could have a whole thread devoted to just his bad movies....Over the Top anyone?

[Pioli Zombie]

Originally Posted by Chiefless

Groundhog Day?

Ok. That's one.
Posted via Mobile Device

[KCUnited]

Originally Posted by Deberg_1990

Stallone could have a whole thread devoted to just his bad movies....Over the Top anyone?

You done ****ed up now. "It's like a switch."

This one on the other hand.

[Chiefless]

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

Ok. That's one.
Posted via Mobile Device

Sex, Lies and Video Tape? Probably a stretch for the planet brotherhood.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

I'm still trying to figure out what Rob Lowe was saying in that heavy speech about whatever the hell St Elmos Fire was. Such deep meaning you know can be learned from the angst of 22 year old Georgetown graduates. And has Andie McDowell been in one decent movie??
Posted via Mobile Device

To be fair, she has to care for her fat loud talkative lesbian reerun sister.

[FAX]

I've thought a lot about this and my selection is .... wait for it .... wait for it .... "Johnny Guitar". Ta daaa.

It's so bad, it's great.

FAX

[Saccopoo]

I'm adding another one to the list:

Southland Tales

Starring: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Sean Thomas Michael Steven Lester Theodore Scott, Justin Timberlake, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Chris "Man I wish I could make just one more Highlander movie" Lambert, a plethora of other horrible B rate actors, and a host of the worst of the worst from Saturday Night Live from the past 15 years.

Premise: In post-nuclear holocaust Texas 2008, society deals with the GWB administrations failures in Iraq and Syria, an evil corporate international power possessing fascist Orwellian level control, and a national underground Marxist movement led by the most unbelievably stupid characters that one could imagine while Boxer Santanananaosomething lives a life of surreal, transcendental moments due to his being force through a rift in the time-space continuum along with fellow protagonist Dude Where's My Car. Features Justin Timberlake as a pyschotic super actor turned PTSS army veteran sniper who has a great chorus line song and dance number where he drinks beer and pours it over his head.

Exploding zeppelins, suicide, martyrdom, implied FFM poorly executed tango dance offs and the revelation of mankinds new messiah cap this stunner off.

Whoever wrote this, directed this and produced this steaming pile of gopher shit should be wrapped in chicken wire and cinder blocks and dumped over the side of a boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.