Who sired Daru?

[Gonzo]

I sent the following email to Daru:

Daru,
Greetings from Chiefsplanet. It's customary for mods to send emails to our site members when they haven't been around for a while. We just like to check in and make sure they're ok. Please reply when you get a chance.
Thank you.

Here was the reply:

Dear sir,
I write to you from the north. I have conquered the ghastly Nordic scum and next shall be adressing the issues we've been having with the bloody Hun. I assure you my complete victory within the next few days. Once my goals have been achieved, I will reassert my efforts towards the colonization of Papau, New Guinea and delivering the word of Daru to whatever godless heathens should cross my path.
My apologies for my sporadic attendance. However, you all must come to the realization that 100% Daruism cannot be achieved by spending time on your website discussing the pros and cons of scotch eggs, burnt ends and polls about candy.
Regards,
Daru