Hypothetical: Get reincarnated here.

[Rain Man]

Just for fun, I've been dividing the world up into regions, and just finished last night. I divided the world into 16,789 regions based on states, provinces, communities, islands, arrondissements, or whatever else happened to be handy.

I didn't know what to do with it, so I created a reincarnation simulator. Sign up here and learn about your next life in advance. I'll give you:

Gender: (Male or Female)
Intelligence: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Attractiveness: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Economic Status: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Nation of Future Birth
Region of Future Birth
Population of that Region (which is somewhat useless since the boundaries are generally manmade, but hey, I've got it)

All statuses are relative to the region that you're in, not the world. So if you draw a 50 on economic status and you're born in the Badghis regions of Afghanistan, that means that you're at the median status of Badghis residents.

Sign up below if you're interested in the early release of your next life. I'll do three reincarnations per day, with the goal that we can discuss and decide which of the three has the best future fate awaiting them. Feel free to post pictures, maps, or descriptions of the reincarnated person's life as you see it.

So sign up below and we'll do the first three today.


Methodology: All figures are random. The probability of being born into a particular region is based on the population of that region.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by CaliforniaChief

I'm in! Kill me Rainman!

CaliforniaChief will have to change his username to Japanchief:

Gender Female
Intelligence 50
Appearance 88
Wealth 60
Nation Japan
Region Fukushima
Population 1,935,000

The good news is that he'll become a very hot Japanese woman in the middle class. The bad news - isn't that where the nuclear reactor blew up in the tsunami?

Assuming she's alive, she'll probably live in a place like this. Seems pleasant enough: https://www.google.com/maps/@37.7306...7i13312!8i6656

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Dartgod will float out of his old earthly body and into ...

Gender Female
Intelligence 70
Appearance 45
Wealth 78
Nation Indonesia
Region Jember
Population 2,332,726

Jember is a nice tropical area on eastern Java, and dartgod is an established member of the B list - not upper class, but pretty close.

He's 20 miles from a beach, but lives in a nice neighborhood like this: https://www.google.com/maps/place/Je...!4d113.7009312

Good news is she probably owns that truck.

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

CaliforniaChief will have to change his username to Japanchief:

Gender Female
Intelligence 50
Appearance 88
Wealth 60
Nation Japan
Region Fukushima
Population 1,935,000

The good news is that he'll become a very hot Japanese woman in the middle class. The bad news - isn't that where the nuclear reactor blew up in the tsunami?

Assuming she's alive, she'll probably live in a place like this. Seems pleasant enough: https://www.google.com/maps/@37.7306...7i13312!8i6656

That's not a bad pull. Probably has the resources to move from the nuke site.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Sorter

I'm in provided there's an update on Sandbox.

We're working away on Sandbox with a programming intern. It's going to be awesome.

That said, you'll be awesome looking, but you'll need it to dig yourself out of an economic hole.

Gender Female
Intelligence 49
Appearance 82
Wealth 20
Nation India
Region Surguja
Population 2,359,886

You'll probably live on this street, but you'll look good doing it. And hey, you likely have a home, so it could be worse.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Pawnmower

What will I be in my next life m lord

Pawnmower continues our trend of gender changes, though in his case it's hard to tell. Perhaps there's been some inbreeding, because she is part of the one of the richest families in the region and clearly didn't make that money with her intelligence or charisma.

Gender Female
Intelligence 24
Appearance 5
Wealth 100
Nation Philippines
Region Zambales
Population 627,802

Granted, being the richest person in the Zambales region doesn't apparently mean yachts. I'm guessing you live in a home like this, though, which is quite nice: https://www.google.com/maps/@14.4654...7i13312!8i6656

[Amnorix]

With wealth like that, hopefully she can afford a plastic surgeon...

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Amnorix

With wealth like that, hopefully she can afford a plastic surgeon...

With her intelligence, though, I'd worry that she would get duck lips or implants that are way too big.

I like the house, though. That's a nice place. It took a lot of work to find a nice house in that region. For some reason, the beachfront roads that you'd expect to be nice tended to be lower income or lower-middle income areas. Maybe being next to the water isn't that desirable in the Philippines?

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Fire Me Boy!

That's not a bad pull. Probably has the resources to move from the nuke site.

You can definitely do worse than being a reasonably smart middle class Japanese hottie, nuclear meltdown or not.

[alnorth]

Is it possible, however unlikely, for you to come up with Antarctica? Or is it not in your database since there's no permanent population and its just all government scientists living in bases?

edit: That would be a place which would really throw off the numbers. If you are poor and dumb in Antarctica, that wouldn't be that bad because you are being compared to geniuses with government jobs. If your appearance was bad in that group that would hurt though, and having a high score would be just average looks in the rest of the world.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by alnorth

Is it possible, however unlikely, for you to come up with Antarctica? Or is it not in your database since there's no permanent population and its just all government scientists living in bases?

Looking through the data, there's an "Australian Antarctic Territory" showing a population of approximately 1,000 people, and a Chilean Antarctic Territory with about 1,800 people. There might be others that I'm not seeing. So while it strains credulity a little, you could actually be reincarnated there. I doubt that those are scientific stations, but maybe they are? I have no idea.

The smallest population division I have, by the way, is 2 people on Alofi Island in the nation of Wallis & Futuna. I also show 3 people on the island of Nukuhifala in the same nation, and 4 people in the Coral Sea Islands of Australia.

The odds are really low of drawing one of those as your reincarnation.

[alnorth]

Random fun fact while researching Antarctica: to date only 11 people are known to have been born there. Makes sense, if you are pregnant you probably are going to delay going there or leave if you are there.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by alnorth

Random fun fact while researching Antarctica: to date only 11 people are known to have been born there. Makes sense, if you are pregnant you probably are going to delay going there or leave if you are there.

Very interesting. I vaguely recall that the employment terms at the South Pole station were a year or something, so were these 11 perhaps drunken hookups of scientists during their stay?

[New World Order]

I'm in!

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Rausch

Nice try L. Ron...

Whether he likes it or not, Rausch will come back in another incarnation.

Gender Male
Intelligence 53
Appearance 21
Wealth 89
Nation Japan
Region Tottori
Population 574,000

It looks like he'll be a well-situated store owner or something in the southern part of Honshu. I bet it's a short train ride to Osaka from there. He'll live in a nice home like this - busy road, but ocean view.

https://www.google.com/maps/@35.5217...7i13312!8i6656

[Fire Me Boy!]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Whether he likes it or not, Rausch will come back in another incarnation.

Gender Male
Intelligence 53
Appearance 21
Wealth 89
Nation Japan
Region Tottori
Population 574,000

It looks like he'll be a well-situated store owner or something in the southern part of Honshu. I bet it's a short train ride to Osaka from there. He'll live in a nice home like this - busy road, but ocean view.

https://www.google.com/maps/@35.5217...7i13312!8i6656

Slightly above average intelligence, so he'll know he's a dog. But rich enough it won't matter that much.

Not a bad draw.