**** Green Bean Casserole!.....and other fun Thanksgiving discussions.

[TimBone]

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, I just wanted to take a moment and say **** your GBC and anyone who swears it's the premier side dish at any Thanksgiving dinner.

90% of the time it's ****ing canned cream of mushroom soup, canned green beans, and processed fried onion straws. ****ing garbage. And even when people try and church it up with fresh ingredients, it can still eat a bag of dicks. It sucks. Case closed.


That being said, I love you all, and want to hear about your Thanksgiving dishes. What are your favorite sides? How do you prepare your turkey? If you don't do turkey, what is your main dish?

Did yall know that SNR prefers semen over both Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip?

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by TimBone

It'd have to be a super unique recipe for me to change my stance.

I dunno what it is, if they've changed the cream of mushroom soup, or blatant incompetence, but it seems like when I was a kid, GBC was a nice firm caserole and had seasoned beef in there and was passable.

Seems like whenever I get it these days it's a runny mushy catastrophe. I

I've never been a GBC fanboy so I don't pay any attention, so I'm open to whatever, but that's been my experience.

[mililo4cpa]

Every year, I fry a Turkey (except last year, I tried one and smoked one, and all agreed fried was better)

At any rate, we also try different things w/ sides to spice it up a little. I don’t mind “traditional” sides at all, but the variations we have come up with are pretty damn good. Our “menu”:

-horseradish and sour cream mashed potatoes (simple play on the regular)
-cornbread stuffing w/ sausage and fennel (again, simple variation)
-collard green gratin (sub for GBC)
-Thyme roasted parsnips and apples

All goes very well with the fried turkey

[TimBone]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Home made whipped cream (don't be bitches, just take the 5 minutes to whip cream sugar and vanilla and do the shit right) make whatever desert better (not a big pecan or pumpkin pie fan).

This is legit gamechanging for me. Gonna try it this year. I'm happy I made this thread now.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by TimBone

This is legit gamechanging for me. Gonna try it this year. I'm happy I made this thread now.

You just wanted to hear me bitch about my **** sister.

Just use a stand mixer. It takes a next level mother****er to do it with a wisk.

[KS Smitty]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

You just wanted to hear me bitch about my **** sister.

Just use a stand mixer. It takes a next level mother****er to do it with a wisk.

Also if your bowl is cold (we put ours in the freezer) it will whip faster and stay fluffy longer.

[mililo4cpa]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Yeah, I have the smoked turkey pretty much down, I will say find a way to brine it, which is harder with a giant ass bird, but I just went and bought a cheapie big cooler and said, this will be used for nothing because I'm not confident it will ever be clean again but that's how I do it.

In order for it to be pretty right, you have to keep it <40 degrees. Which is fine if you can get it in some container and in the fridge like all these sister****ers that are doing it with 10 lb birds and saying SUPER EASY HERPDERP. But yeah, don't know how many you are serving, but brining is worth the time and effort.

That being said, I ****ing hate turkey. I knock out a good one and it's fine, good even, but I do have a cursory understanding of microeconomics and I can't get around the opportunity cost concept and if I'm going to fire up the smoker, at least let me cook something I want to cook. Ya ****s. But NOPE nobody ever gives a **** what I think.

And that's probably part of the reason I hate turkey is I'm a miserable son of a bitch for the holiday get togethers. I genuinely cannot stand my **** sister. Wifes sisters all treat me really good, but that fiasco has 35 people at it and getting them all fed with 5 girls with 10 peoples worth of ADD floating around, is just a nightmare.

So yeah, giant holiday get togethers just don't trip my trigger.

If I could do something with the wife and kids and my parents and then maybe another one with wife and kids and her parents, there would probably be much less baked in resentment regarding the food, but when I'm starting from a position of, "I'd rather eat a bullet than this meal." It's hard to come up with happy thoughts.

All that being said, fresh bread is fantastic. My **** sister found some pumpkin rolls with cream filling in there (I'm sure my mom is buying them now) that are wonderful.

Home made whipped cream (don't be bitches, just take the 5 minutes to whip cream sugar and vanilla and do the shit right) make whatever desert better (not a big pecan or pumpkin pie fan).

I'm a sucker for proper mashed potatoes - I never make them any more, because frankly, I need to spend those calories elsewhere, and it takes FOREVER to cut and boil potatoes, then mash them then gravy - blah blah blah - but they're good on occasion.

Stuffing, with whatever they put in it to make it good is legit.

I spatchcocked*** mine, so brining the flattened Turkey wasn’t too terrible…..also felt that it mad the smoking process much easier, as the flat Turkey cooked more evenly than keeping it whole and having air in the cavity. Curious to know if you do anything differently when smoking it

***jokes ensuing

[seclark]

**** green bean casserole.
When I was a kid and too young to fix my own plate, I’d sneak that nasty shit under the table,hoping the dog would eat it. And if there wasn’t any dog, I’d do it anyway and blame it on my little sister.
sec

[Donger]

Unless something has changed with that particular vegetable since I was last forced to eat it about 40 years ago, you can take that dish and shove it up your ass.

[KCUnited]

Originally Posted by Bill Brasky

Spatzle and key lime pie? What the **** kind of thanksgiving menu is that?

Give the key lime a whirl. I was turned onto it a few years ago and never went back.

Light, refreshing and brightens up the heavy, rich sloppiness of Thanksgiving food.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by mililo4cpa

I spatchcocked*** mine, so brining the flattened Turkey wasn’t too terrible…..also felt that it mad the smoking process much easier, as the flat Turkey cooked more evenly than keeping it whole and having air in the cavity. Curious to know if you do anything differently when smoking it

***jokes ensuing

Theory is it will cook more evenly - you don't have to overcook the thighs to get the breast done.

I know people that swear by it but haven't done it. Some guys I know swear by it. I've never had trouble with the thighs gettting too hot.

[displacedinMN]

Hyvee does make a good meal, if you want to go that route.

[sedated]

Ugh, I cannot stand green bean casserole. And green beans are delicious if fresh and cooked right.

I volunteered to make GBC one year and made fresh green beans instead and caught shit from everyone, so I guess I'm an outlier.

[sedated]

This year in my family somehow corn was turned into corn casserole, mashed potatoes were turned into mashed potato casserole, and obviously we can't have regular (delicious) green beans so that will be in casserole form too.

The only non-casserole items on the table will be turkey and stuffing.

[sedated]

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

Mac n cheese is the only side I truly give a shit about. Love mashed taters, broccoli and cheese is good, stuffing is great, but if there's no mac n cheese, I ain't showing up!

This may make for a decent poll.

I was the first to bring mac N cheese to Thanksgiving and did so for a few years, then mentioned it to someone else and they said mac N cheese isn't a Thanksgiving side.

Not that I care what people think and sides can be anything we please, but I assumed our family was missing a critical, classic side forever before I brought it. Apparently its not the staple that I thought.

[TimBone]

Originally Posted by sedated

This may make for a decent poll.



I was the first to bring mac N cheese to Thanksgiving and did so for a few years, then mentioned it to someone else and they said mac N cheese isn't a Thanksgiving side.



Not that I care what people think and sides can be anything we please, but I assumed our family was missing a critical, classic side forever before I brought it. Apparently its not the staple that I thought.

Man...I wouldn't think a poll is needed on that one. I've always figured Mac n Cheese as a Thanksgiving side dish.

I was thinking about running a sweet potato pie vs pumpkin pie poll, though.