Chiefs Chiefs Fan Diseases

**The Franchise** · 02-26-2009, 04:55 PM

From a poster on WPI....who got it off of Arrowhead Addict.

Attention to Quarterback Deficit Disorder - This one is rather easy to define, and is classified by a chronic state of denial when it comes to quarterback being the undisputed most important position in the NFL. These victims will often state that you can’t have a quarterback until you have a dominant line, not realizing that a race car is just a worthless hunk of parts without a great driver behind the wheel.

Bob Gretz Syndrome - A cerebral state of rampant homerism that has spiraled out of control. Most of the time, the victim doesn’t even realize that the rose-colored glasses are permanently strapped to their face. While the enthusiasm is nice to see, the tangents of those struggling with BGS can get rather annoying.

Bradyomania - Typically associated with those in Chiefs Nation who are experiencing frequent hallucinations about the Chiefs finding a franchise quarterback in the seventh round, or even Tyler Thigpen turning out to be that guy. This is a harmless condition, but it can have quite an effect on one’s social status if these hallucinations become public, as the victim can become isolated.

(Aaron) Curry Fever - An obsessive-compulsive disorder that typically goes hand in hand with memory loss. Those with Curry Fever often forget that in the past 20 years only three linebackers have been selected in the top three — Kevin Hardy, LaVar Arrington and Quentin Coryatt. Somehow those stricken with Curry Fever fail to remember that all three of these players have to be considered draft busts. They refuse to realize that LBs who can’t rush the passer and are picked in the top five have not fared well. Curry Fever victims also like to compare Curry to pass rushers like Derrick Thomas (picked fourth in ‘89) and Lawrence Taylor (taken second a half-century ago), even though he’s not a pass rusher (9.5 sacks in four years of college). If when approached about this fact someone responds, “yeah, but this year is different,” seek clinical care for them immediately — they definitely have a strong case of Curry Fever.

Hermitis - A chemical imbalance in the brain that leads its victims to believe that NFL rebuilding efforts take 3-4 years, or as long as college rebuilding efforts. Hermaphobia was most recently disproved by the Atlanta Falcons, Baltimore Ravens and Miami Dolphins, all in 2008.

King Carl’s Disease - A deranged mental state where the victim becomes obsessed with bargain hunting and duct tape-repair jobs. Every move is made with the intent to stay over .500, fill the seats and muzzle Chiefs Nation and the media. Unfortunately, some Chiefs fans have become KGD victims themselves. Some phrases that are commonly associated with this mental condition: “free agency is a waste of money,” “build through the draft — not free agency” and “first-round quarterbacks are too risky.” Anxiety over any aggressive front office move — especially spending! — is a common symptom.

Martyballism - This is similar to dementia, but only with Chiefs football. Some Chiefs fans have the tendency to remember the Martyball era in a more favorable light than they should. These fans are typically the same ones who think a dominant defense and caretaker quarterback are the only path to the Super Bowl. How quickly they forget that the only year Martyball made the AFC Championship, the Chiefs were led to that game by Joe Montana.

Vermeilaphobia - This paranoid frame of mind is almost always found in those also dealing with a strong case of Martyballism. Those suffering with Vermielaphobia tend to think that great offenses cannot make or win Super Bowls, when history clearly proves that viewpoint wrong. These victims also think any team that focuses more on offense will always just completely ignore the defensive side of the ball. Possibly the most irrational affliction currently diagnosed among Chiefs fans. One theory is that victims just prefer “meat and potatoes” football, and would rather win ugly in low-scoring affairs than in shootouts. Most rational fans just want to win in the fashion best suited for their favorite team, whether it be with defense, offense or, preferably, both.

**OnTheWarpath15** · 02-26-2009, 05:05 PM

**Mr. Flopnuts** · 02-26-2009, 05:06 PM

Pure awesomeness.

Pioli Zombie · 02-26-2009, 05:51 PM

They left out reerunica. They constant need to call people reeruns.
Posted via Mobile Device

**OnTheWarpath15** · 02-26-2009, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie

They left out reerunica. They constant need to call people reeruns.
Posted via Mobile Device

If you don't want to know you have the clap, don't go to the doctor.
Posted via Laz' Mobile Device

Fritz88 · 02-26-2009, 05:54 PM

awesome post, I tried to rep but I got this.

Quote:

You have given out too much Reputation in the last 24 hours, try again later.

Sofa King · 02-26-2009, 05:54 PM

awesome article!

kstater · 02-26-2009, 05:55 PM

speak24 · 02-26-2009, 06:32 PM

Keep it away...

kcbubb · 02-26-2009, 07:04 PM

nice..... that's really good.

just to be argumentative, you still have a case reachism where you are prone to select a player based on need, higher than they should be picked. Sanchez is not worth the #3 pick.

Rigodan · 02-26-2009, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcbubb

nice..... that's really good.

just to be argumentative, you still have a case reachism where you are prone to select a player based on need, higher than they should be picked. Sanchez is not worth the #3 pick.

Arent you advocating taking a cover OLB with the #3 pick?

Danman · 02-26-2009, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcbubb

nice..... that's really good.

just to be argumentative, you still have a case reachism where you are prone to select a player based on need, higher than they should be picked. Sanchez is not worth the #3 pick.

Wow! This thread made it all the way to the 10th post before it disintegrated into "Sanchez is not worth the #3 pick." Clearly you are infected with some of the above maladies. But there is hope my friend, there is hope.

FAX · 02-26-2009, 07:46 PM

They left out Pioliosis. An acute inflammation of the penis whenever Scott Pioli's name is mentioned. Victims exhibit uninhibited adoration and a tendency to become violent when Pioli's judgment is questioned. Advanced cases are known to trust the Chiefs' GM alone with their wife, children, and new car.

FAX

Reerun_KC · 02-26-2009, 08:33 PM

Awesome!

**DeezNutz** · 02-26-2009, 09:05 PM

Very funny. Also remarkably quiet in here.

02-26-2009, 04:55 PM
The Franchise Most Valuable Villain Join Date: Dec 2006 Casino cash: $2065047	Chiefs Fan Diseases From a poster on WPI....who got it off of Arrowhead Addict. Attention to Quarterback Deficit Disorder - This one is rather easy to define, and is classified by a chronic state of denial when it comes to quarterback being the undisputed most important position in the NFL. These victims will often state that you can’t have a quarterback until you have a dominant line, not realizing that a race car is just a worthless hunk of parts without a great driver behind the wheel. Bob Gretz Syndrome - A cerebral state of rampant homerism that has spiraled out of control. Most of the time, the victim doesn’t even realize that the rose-colored glasses are permanently strapped to their face. While the enthusiasm is nice to see, the tangents of those struggling with BGS can get rather annoying. Bradyomania - Typically associated with those in Chiefs Nation who are experiencing frequent hallucinations about the Chiefs finding a franchise quarterback in the seventh round, or even Tyler Thigpen turning out to be that guy. This is a harmless condition, but it can have quite an effect on one’s social status if these hallucinations become public, as the victim can become isolated. (Aaron) Curry Fever - An obsessive-compulsive disorder that typically goes hand in hand with memory loss. Those with Curry Fever often forget that in the past 20 years only three linebackers have been selected in the top three — Kevin Hardy, LaVar Arrington and Quentin Coryatt. Somehow those stricken with Curry Fever fail to remember that all three of these players have to be considered draft busts. They refuse to realize that LBs who can’t rush the passer and are picked in the top five have not fared well. Curry Fever victims also like to compare Curry to pass rushers like Derrick Thomas (picked fourth in ‘89) and Lawrence Taylor (taken second a half-century ago), even though he’s not a pass rusher (9.5 sacks in four years of college). If when approached about this fact someone responds, “yeah, but this year is different,” seek clinical care for them immediately — they definitely have a strong case of Curry Fever. Hermitis - A chemical imbalance in the brain that leads its victims to believe that NFL rebuilding efforts take 3-4 years, or as long as college rebuilding efforts. Hermaphobia was most recently disproved by the Atlanta Falcons, Baltimore Ravens and Miami Dolphins, all in 2008. King Carl’s Disease - A deranged mental state where the victim becomes obsessed with bargain hunting and duct tape-repair jobs. Every move is made with the intent to stay over .500, fill the seats and muzzle Chiefs Nation and the media. Unfortunately, some Chiefs fans have become KGD victims themselves. Some phrases that are commonly associated with this mental condition: “free agency is a waste of money,” “build through the draft — not free agency” and “first-round quarterbacks are too risky.” Anxiety over any aggressive front office move — especially spending! — is a common symptom. Martyballism - This is similar to dementia, but only with Chiefs football. Some Chiefs fans have the tendency to remember the Martyball era in a more favorable light than they should. These fans are typically the same ones who think a dominant defense and caretaker quarterback are the only path to the Super Bowl. How quickly they forget that the only year Martyball made the AFC Championship, the Chiefs were led to that game by Joe Montana. Vermeilaphobia - This paranoid frame of mind is almost always found in those also dealing with a strong case of Martyballism. Those suffering with Vermielaphobia tend to think that great offenses cannot make or win Super Bowls, when history clearly proves that viewpoint wrong. These victims also think any team that focuses more on offense will always just completely ignore the defensive side of the ball. Possibly the most irrational affliction currently diagnosed among Chiefs fans. One theory is that victims just prefer “meat and potatoes” football, and would rather win ugly in low-scoring affairs than in shootouts. Most rational fans just want to win in the fashion best suited for their favorite team, whether it be with defense, offense or, preferably, both.
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02-26-2009, 05:05 PM	#2
OnTheWarpath15 MVP Join Date: Sep 2005 Casino cash: $2061115
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02-26-2009, 05:51 PM	#4
Pioli Zombie Banned Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: olathe,kansas Casino cash: $10004900	They left out reerunica. They constant need to call people reeruns. Posted via Mobile Device
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02-26-2009, 05:54 PM	#7
Sofa King Bump it Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: South Dakota Casino cash: $-360000 VARSITY	awesome article!
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02-26-2009, 05:55 PM	#8
kstater Custom User Title Join Date: Jan 2007 Casino cash: $-1653437
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02-26-2009, 06:32 PM	#9
speak24 Banned Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Southern Johnson Co, KS Casino cash: $10004900	Keep it away...
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02-26-2009, 07:04 PM	#10
kcbubb Veteran Join Date: Nov 2008 Casino cash: $5016719	nice..... that's really good. just to be argumentative, you still have a case reachism where you are prone to select a player based on need, higher than they should be picked. Sanchez is not worth the #3 pick.
Posts: 2,557

02-26-2009, 07:46 PM	#13
FAX testing ... 1, 2, 3 Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Tennessee Casino cash: $6753759	They left out Pioliosis. An acute inflammation of the penis whenever Scott Pioli's name is mentioned. Victims exhibit uninhibited adoration and a tendency to become violent when Pioli's judgment is questioned. Advanced cases are known to trust the Chiefs' GM alone with their wife, children, and new car. FAX
Posts: 44,492

02-26-2009, 08:33 PM	#14
Reerun_KC Banned Join Date: Aug 2005 Casino cash: $7231160	Awesome!
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