Money Marriage problems: First one to mention Anti-freeze wins - Page 6

Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 07:50 AM

My wife and I had a joint checking account for the first 7 years of our marriage. We constantly fought about money during this time. The past year we have done a seperate account deal and things have never been better. We still pay all the bills together. I pay about 54% and she pays 46%. Those figures are based on our income. There is no right or wrong way to do it. You just have to figure out what works for you as a couple and roll with it.

NewChief · 06-15-2010, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nixhex

My wife and I had a joint checking account for the first 7 years of our marriage. We constantly fought about money during this time. The past year we have done a seperate account deal and things have never been better. We still pay all the bills together. I pay about 54% and she pays 46%. Those figures are based on our income. There is no right or wrong way to do it. You just have to figure out what works for you as a couple and roll with it.

This is how we do it, pretty much. I think I'm about to change it up, though, because it's become harder to budget.

I think we're going to get one joint account (and really all of our accounts are "joint" in that we can transfer money between them at will) that we use to pay all bills from (through automated bill pay). Both of our paychecks will direct deposit into this account.

After that, we'll pull out a set "allowance" into each of our individual accounts to spend as we see fit.

Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 07:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewPhin

This is how we do it, pretty much. I think I'm about to change it up, though, because it's become harder to budget.

I think we're going to get one joint account (and really all of our accounts are "joint" in that we can transfer money between them at will) that we use to pay all bills from (through automated bill pay). Both of our paychecks will direct deposit into this account.

After that, we'll pull out a set "allowance" into each of our individual accounts to spend as we see fit.

If that works for you then there is nothing wrong with it. If problems arise over time with the current system you are using you can always change it up. It doesn't have to be one way or the highway as many here seem to think.

**Rain Man** · 06-15-2010, 07:57 AM

i'm curious. do the separate finance people do so because their spouses have different saving/spending philosophies? and if you save diligently and your spouse spends every penny, how will retirement go? will you be going on cruises by yourself? will the two of you go grocery shopping and you'll be putting steak in your cart while she's stocking up on fancy feast? I would think the odds are high that one of you will have much more money over a 50-year time period.
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Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

i'm curious. do the separate finance people do so because their spouses have different saving/spending philosophies? and if you save diligently and your spouse spends every penny, how will retirement go? will you be going on cruises by yourself? will the two of you go grocery shopping and you'll be putting steak in your cart while she's stocking up on fancy feast? I would think the odds are high that one of you will have much more money over a 50-year time period.
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This is interesting. I do believe I will end up ahead in the long run due to my spending habits. She likes to spend every dime. I'm more frugal. As for food, we treat the groceries as a bill and share in the expense. No one will eat any better or worse than the other. In this past year I've been able to do more things for my family as a result of my frugal nature. In the past my wife may have blown this money on junk. If things get tough for one of us we will adapt our way of doing things to a way that works. This system doesn't have to remain exact until death do us part. It can change as our lives change.

**Rain Man** · 06-15-2010, 08:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nixhex

This is interesting. I do believe I will end up ahead in the long run due to my spending habits. She likes to spend every dime. I'm more frugal. As for food, we treat the groceries as a bill and share in the expense. No one will eat any better or worse than the other. In this past year I've been able to do more things for my family as a result of my frugal nature. In the past my wife may have blown this money on junk. If things get tough for one of us we will adapt our way of doing things to a way that works. This system doesn't have to remain exact until death do us part. It can change as our lives change.

that's cool if it works for you. it seems like your wife gets to have her cake and eat it too with both spending and a savings safety net while you get neither advantage, though.

perhaps i'm just lucky that my wife and I have similar philosophies so i've never had to figure this out.
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Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 08:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

that's cool if it works for you. it seems like your wife gets to have her cake and eat it too with both spending and a savings safety net while you get neither advantage, though.

perhaps i'm just lucky that my wife and I have similar philosophies so i've never had to figure this out.
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You are lucky. I'd prefer to do it the old fashion way. It just didn't work for us. Our system is working for now. It may change in the future though. Only time will tell.

MOhillbilly · 06-15-2010, 08:00 AM

**** you pay me.

say it, love it, live it.

Huffman83 · 06-15-2010, 08:14 AM

What's interesting is how much the options/opinions given work and don't work.

There isn't an answer to this is there?

**Lumpy** · 06-15-2010, 08:15 AM

PIIHB

Huffman83 · 06-15-2010, 08:16 AM

And btw, after talking a little further. She apologized.

Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Huffman83

And btw, after talking a little further. She apologized.

So did you get to finish on her face or perhaps she swallowed?

Huffman83 · 06-15-2010, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nixhex

So did you get to finish on her face or perhaps she swallowed?

Fortunately I don't have to be in a fight in order to get those things.

So I got that going for me!

Nixhex · 06-15-2010, 08:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Huffman83

Fortunately I don't have to be in a fight in order to get those things.

So I got that going for me!

**Rausch** · 06-15-2010, 08:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nixhex

So did you get to finish on her face or perhaps she swallowed?

I see two people unwilling to give up their expectations.

Not saying who's right or wrong, just pretty much what you've laid out for us.

That only ends one way...

06-15-2010, 07:50 AM	#1
Nixhex Chiefn' It Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: IndepMo Casino cash: $7415142	My wife and I had a joint checking account for the first 7 years of our marriage. We constantly fought about money during this time. The past year we have done a seperate account deal and things have never been better. We still pay all the bills together. I pay about 54% and she pays 46%. Those figures are based on our income. There is no right or wrong way to do it. You just have to figure out what works for you as a couple and roll with it.
Posts: 1,490

06-15-2010, 07:57 AM	#4
Rain Man Seize life. Be an ermine. Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $-762449 VARSITY	i'm curious. do the separate finance people do so because their spouses have different saving/spending philosophies? and if you save diligently and your spouse spends every penny, how will retirement go? will you be going on cruises by yourself? will the two of you go grocery shopping and you'll be putting steak in your cart while she's stocking up on fancy feast? I would think the odds are high that one of you will have much more money over a 50-year time period. Posted via Mobile Device
Posts: 145,588

06-15-2010, 08:00 AM	#8
MOhillbilly Mama Tried Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Missouri Casino cash: $9949903	**** you pay me. say it, love it, live it. __________________ True Son of Liberty
Posts: 23,371

06-15-2010, 08:14 AM	#9
Huffman83 Veteran Join Date: Mar 2007 Casino cash: $10008077	What's interesting is how much the options/opinions given work and don't work. There isn't an answer to this is there?
Posts: 2,240

06-15-2010, 08:16 AM	#11
Huffman83 Veteran Join Date: Mar 2007 Casino cash: $10008077	And btw, after talking a little further. She apologized.
Posts: 2,240