Greatest accomplishment in the history of sport?

[WilliamTheIrish]

As many of you know, I am a big shot who is basically in charge of making $$ 24-7. However, during the Big 12 Phillips 66 Hobby Sport Tornament, I put down the $10k briefcase, take off the $8k suit and shake my ass down at the PNL/Sprint Center with my EMAW bros. My first impressions from Wednesday so far:

In general, Sand Aggie is one of the more ugly fanbases we will encounter here in this hotspot. However, with the removal of the ugliest fanbase in history, Mizzou, they are somehow not as annoying right now. Mold aggie fans are gonna mold aggie. There are none here except 8 of them whose tractor broke down in front of Johnnys. They all came in and broke out bag lunches and ordered one big beer that they are sharing. I assume the other 5,000 are packed into Kellys, singing along to Piano Man.

UT fans are here, and they seem quietly confident except when they meet a EMAW fan. Then they flinch like a Iraqi vet in a thunderstorm. I like them thoguh as they are almost as rich as the EMAW fans.

There are no TCU fans. I am almost certain now that the school is made up. They fooled us for a whole season. Well done, toad aggie.

It cannot be overstated that this hobby sport tournament is now at least 100% better without Missouri fans here. Everyone is better looking and smelling. There are less horrible goatee/triple chin combos. No losers chain smoking menthols in front of Lucky Strike. No meth salesmen. I am confident that there is at least 80% less dookie on the bathroom door handles.

So, cheers Big 12 Hobby Sport fans, post your reports here and lets party!

Limestone's "Official Report" from the Big XII Hobby Sport Tourney.