Chiefs Raider Jokes - Page 2

Mr. Arrowhead · 11-01-2010, 05:36 PM

Ok lets hear em

KCHawg · 11-01-2010, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zebedee DuBois

How many Raiders fans does it take to shingle a house?

Depends on how much you overlap them....

cookster50 · 11-01-2010, 05:56 PM

How do you fit 100 raider fans into a car? Blender. How do you get 100 raider fans out of a car? Crackers.

Marcellus · 11-01-2010, 06:13 PM

The difference between the Coliseum and a Hoover vacuum cleaner.

Only 1 dirtbag in a Hoover.

**notorious** · 11-01-2010, 07:10 PM

Why do Raider fans have chain-link steering wheels in their car?

So they can escape from the cops with cuffs on.

**Buck** · 11-01-2010, 08:20 PM

This joke used to be relevant.

Q: How do you keep a Raiders fan from jerking off?

A: Paint his dick Blue and Yellow and he won't beat it for 6.5 years

**Mr. Flopnuts** · 11-01-2010, 08:22 PM

I posted this in another thread, but it belongs here.

A new teacher was starting in the Denver school district in her first teaching job and she was a little nervous. She was trying to think of ways to connect with her new students in her 5th grade home room and felt she had come up with a good ice breaker.

"Good morning class, my name is Ms. Schultz and I'm your new teacher. I'm a big Denver Broncos fan. Can all of you who are Denver Broncos fans please raise your hand?"

Every child in the class raised their hand, save one.

"I see you didn't raise your hand there, little lady. What's your name? How come you didn't raise your hand?"

"My name is Suzy, and I didn't raise my hand because I'm not a Denver Broncos fan." Suzy replied.

"Well why aren't you a Denver Broncos fan, Suzy? We live in Denver. Most people who live here are Denver Broncos fans."

"I'm not a Denver Broncos fan because my mother and father aren't Denver Broncos fans! They're Chiefs fans! And I'm a Chiefs fan too!" Suzy exclaimed.

At this point the teacher was a little flabbergasted. She was not counting on such a passionate, and adverse response to her ice breaking exercise and was clearly a little frustrated. "Well Suzy, sometimes it's not always good to just go along with what other people say, or think you should. For instance, if your father was an ex con crack dealer, and your mother was a whore, would you still be a Chiefs fan?" The teacher asked incredulously.

"No." Suzy said, "Then I'd be a Raiders fan."

Mr. Arrowhead · 11-03-2010, 07:55 AM

What do you call 3 Raider fans driving off a cliff in a Volkswagon?

-A damn shame, there was room for one more.

MMXcalibur · 11-03-2010, 07:59 AM

Oakland Raiders.

There.....the joke practically writes itself.

DMAC · 11-03-2010, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by salame

I can tell you who is no joke
this guy has me scared about sunday

I'm benching him for Hyphen (Benjarvus Green-Ellis).

edit: Actually, I think I will pick up Blount so that he can punch mcbundle of sticksgen in the face and knock his ass to the bench.

**Nzoner** · 11-03-2010, 08:12 AM

My fav that I posted in another thread as well.

Four Surgeons are taking a coffee break. The first Surgeon says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second Surgeon says, "Nope, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third Surgeon says, "Well you should try electricians. Everything inside them in color coded." The fourth Surgeon says, "I prefer Raiders fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

Rooster · 11-03-2010, 11:45 AM

Q. What do The Oakland Raiders & Jerry Fallwell have in Common?

A. They both have the ability to make 70,000 people stand up and yell "JESUS CHRIST!"

Rooster · 11-03-2010, 11:48 AM

Three football fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk. Out of respect and propriety, the Seahawk's fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast. The 'Niners' fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead, the Raider's fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.

The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Seahawk's cap, replaced it and wrote down some notes. Next, he lifted the 'Niners' cap, replaced it and wrote down some more notes. The officer then lifted the Raider's cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time. The Raider's fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something?"

"Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking?

"Well", said the officer, "I am simply surprised; normally when I look under a Raider's hat, I find an asshole...."

**DaKCMan AP** · 11-03-2010, 11:52 AM

Jason Campbell.

Chiefs Rool · 11-03-2010, 11:57 AM

What was the difference between these 2 hit and runs? One hit a dog and the other hit a raider fan?

There were only brake marks in front of the dog.

88TG88 · 11-03-2010, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaKCMan AP

Jason Campbell.

11-01-2010, 05:36 PM
Mr. Arrowhead MVP Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Wichita Casino cash: $10015708	Raider Jokes Ok lets hear em
Posts: 7,763

11-01-2010, 05:56 PM	#17
cookster50 Supreme Commander of My House Join Date: Apr 2004 Casino cash: $-56378	How do you fit 100 raider fans into a car? Blender. How do you get 100 raider fans out of a car? Crackers.
Posts: 3,446

11-01-2010, 06:13 PM	#18
Marcellus Diablo Negro Join Date: Sep 2003 Casino cash: $-497338	The difference between the Coliseum and a Hoover vacuum cleaner. Only 1 dirtbag in a Hoover.
Posts: 74,404

11-01-2010, 07:10 PM	#19
notorious Supporter Join Date: May 2005 Location: Who knows? Casino cash: $-974116	Why do Raider fans have chain-link steering wheels in their car? So they can escape from the cops with cuffs on.
Posts: 88,588

11-01-2010, 08:20 PM	#20
Buck Take a Chill Pill Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South Carolina Casino cash: $5990295	This joke used to be relevant. Q: How do you keep a Raiders fan from jerking off? A: Paint his dick Blue and Yellow and he won't beat it for 6.5 years
Posts: 44,606

11-03-2010, 07:55 AM	#22
Mr. Arrowhead MVP Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Wichita Casino cash: $10015708	What do you call 3 Raider fans driving off a cliff in a Volkswagon? -A damn shame, there was room for one more.
Posts: 7,763

11-03-2010, 07:59 AM	#23
MMXcalibur Pessimistically optimistic. Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Denver, CO Casino cash: $-144914	Oakland Raiders. There.....the joke practically writes itself.
Posts: 16,747

11-03-2010, 08:12 AM	#25
Nzoner a haw haw haw Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: MIZZOU Casino cash: $26365802	My fav that I posted in another thread as well. Four Surgeons are taking a coffee break. The first Surgeon says, "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second Surgeon says, "Nope, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The third Surgeon says, "Well you should try electricians. Everything inside them in color coded." The fourth Surgeon says, "I prefer Raiders fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable." __________________ *Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.*
Posts: 27,111

11-03-2010, 11:45 AM	#26
Rooster Draft a QB Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: JoCo Casino cash: $9951689	Q. What do The Oakland Raiders & Jerry Fallwell have in Common? A. They both have the ability to make 70,000 people stand up and yell "JESUS CHRIST!" __________________ When Reno Hightower was a prick he was the best damn quarterback in the history of Kern County.
Posts: 5,753

11-03-2010, 11:48 AM	#27
Rooster Draft a QB Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: JoCo Casino cash: $9951689	Three football fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk. Out of respect and propriety, the Seahawk's fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast. The 'Niners' fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead, the Raider's fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch. The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Seahawk's cap, replaced it and wrote down some notes. Next, he lifted the 'Niners' cap, replaced it and wrote down some more notes. The officer then lifted the Raider's cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time. The Raider's fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something?" "Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking? "Well", said the officer, "I am simply surprised; normally when I look under a Raider's hat, I find an asshole...." __________________ When Reno Hightower was a prick he was the best damn quarterback in the history of Kern County.
Posts: 5,753

11-03-2010, 11:52 AM	#28
DaKCMan AP Beloved & Awesome CP Celebrity Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Florida Casino cash: $5584952	Jason Campbell. __________________
Posts: 35,714

11-03-2010, 11:57 AM	#29
Chiefs Rool Banned Join Date: May 2010 Location: Top City Casino cash: $10004900	What was the difference between these 2 hit and runs? One hit a dog and the other hit a raider fan? There were only brake marks in front of the dog.
Posts: 1,543