Misc Best Facebook Status Updates

CaliforniaChief · 12-17-2009, 02:14 PM

Some of you have verbalized your hatred for Facebook. I like it, and especially enjoy some creative status updates. I'm wondering what the best status updates you've seen/used are.

Here's the one I'm running right now:

"As of today, Facebook staff will be allowed to eat your children and pets. To turn this option off, go to Settings, then Privacy, then Meals. Click the top button to not feed the employees of Facebook anything. Copy this to your status to warn your friends!"

**Saulbadguy** · 12-17-2009, 02:17 PM

"WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE MONDAY?" and "THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY!"

Discuss Thrower · 12-17-2009, 02:20 PM

[It seemed like every other person made a status update about the snow in springfield two weeks ago]

My status: Springfield, Imma let you finish, but the Day after Tomorrow had the best snowstorm.

Nobody really replied to it, and I was pissed.

CaliforniaChief · 12-17-2009, 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J-Town Fan 1988

[It seemed like every other person made a status update about the snow in springfield two weeks ago]

My status: Springfield, Imma let you finish, but the Day after Tomorrow had the best snowstorm.

Nobody really replied to it, and I was pissed.

That's pretty good, IMO. It is disappointing when you think you've got a great update and it lands with a deafening thud.

**Bearcat** · 12-17-2009, 02:19 PM

Here's one I saw last night...

If you don't know, as of today, Facebook wil automatically start plunging the Earth into the Sun. To change this option, go to Settings --> Planetary Settings --> Trajectory then UN-CLICK the box that says 'Apocalypse.' Facebook kept this one quiet. Copy and paste onto your status for all to see.

kepp · 12-17-2009, 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bearcat

Here's one I saw last night...

If you don't know, as of today, Facebook wil automatically start plunging the Earth into the Sun. To change this option, go to Settings --> Planetary Settings --> Trajectory then UN-CLICK the box that says 'Apocalypse.' Facebook kept this one quiet. Copy and paste onto your status for all to see.

I saw that today...funny.

CaliforniaChief · 12-17-2009, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bearcat

Here's one I saw last night...

If you don't know, as of today, Facebook wil automatically start plunging the Earth into the Sun. To change this option, go to Settings --> Planetary Settings --> Trajectory then UN-CLICK the box that says 'Apocalypse.' Facebook kept this one quiet. Copy and paste onto your status for all to see.

I just used this one. The Facebook paranoia is amusing to poke fun at.

**chasedude** · 12-17-2009, 02:21 PM

One of my friends posted this about her 3 yo little girl. I couldn't help but laugh

so, i took autumn to go to the bathroom this morning. when she was sitting on the toilet she farted really long . . . . her eyebrows popped up and she got this surprised look on her face and she said "momma, did that make my hair move?" i said "did what?" and she said "my fart." i said "no, baby, that was the heat vent kicking on!" ROTFL

Demonpenz · 12-17-2009, 02:25 PM

a strawberry cow has wondered onto your farm

**Buck** · 12-17-2009, 02:30 PM

My friend Posted this. We'll call him Friend #1

Friend #1: Chris Henry looks like a black Avatar
-Friend #2: ...too soon?
-Friend #3: They are not called Avatars Garrett! They're called Na'vi...JEEZ!
-Me: *looked*
-Friend #1: Looked?
-Me: No, you said he *looks* like a black Avatar, I corrected you. He *looked* like a black Avatar.
Friend #1: Oooooooh Matt too soon!! Too soon!!! What's wrong with you!!!!

CaliforniaChief · 12-17-2009, 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckinKaeding

My friend Posted this. We'll call him Friend #1

Friend #1: Chris Henry looks like a black Avatar
-Friend #2: ...too soon?
-Friend #3: They are not called Avatars Garrett! They're called Na'vi...JEEZ!
-Me: *looked*
-Friend #1: Looked?
-Me: No, you said he *looks* like a black Avatar, I corrected you. He *looked* like a black Avatar.
Friend #1: Oooooooh Matt too soon!! Too soon!!! What's wrong with you!!!!

That was a status update???

Dark Horse · 12-17-2009, 02:37 PM

I just don't understand all this fancy smancy interbook facenet hoohaw, next thing you know all these youngsters will be running around with tellaphones in their pocket.

CoMoChief · 12-17-2009, 02:39 PM

I saw this one.

"Welp looks like ESPN has decided to broadcast Women's College Basketball on TV again, I guess ESPN is telling me to go study for my physics final"

CaliforniaChief · 12-17-2009, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoMoChief

I saw this one.

"Welp looks like ESPN has decided to broadcast Women's College Basketball on TV again, I guess ESPN is telling me to go study for my physics final"

"Bob" Dobbs · 12-17-2009, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaliforniaChief

Some of you have verbalized your hatred for Facebook. I like it, and especially enjoy some creative status updates. I'm wondering what the best status updates you've seen/used are.

Here's the one I'm running right now:

"As of today, Facebook staff will be allowed to eat your children and pets. To turn this option off, go to Settings, then Privacy, then Meals. Click the top button to not feed the employees of Facebook anything. Copy this to your status to warn your friends!"

Nice. I just stole it. Have some rep in return!

12-17-2009, 02:14 PM	Topic Starter
CaliforniaChief #RIPAce Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: So Cal Casino cash: $10545899	Best Facebook Status Updates Some of you have verbalized your hatred for Facebook. I like it, and especially enjoy some creative status updates. I'm wondering what the best status updates you've seen/used are. Here's the one I'm running right now: "As of today, Facebook staff will be allowed to eat your children and pets. To turn this option off, go to Settings, then Privacy, then Meals. Click the top button to not feed the employees of Facebook anything. Copy this to your status to warn your friends!"
Posts: 17,461

12-17-2009, 02:20 PM	#3
Discuss Thrower "You like to drink?" Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: "I like to drink." Casino cash: $-370000	[It seemed like every other person made a status update about the snow in springfield two weeks ago] My status: Springfield, Imma let you finish, but the Day after Tomorrow had the best snowstorm. Nobody really replied to it, and I was pissed. __________________ Chiefs 2016 Opponents: Home: JAX, TEN, NO, TB, NYJ. Away: HOU, IND, ATL, CAR, PIT Chiefs 2017 Opponents: Home: BUF, MIA, PHI, WSH, AFC North. Away: NE, NYJ, NYG, DAL, AFC South
Posts: 45,257

12-17-2009, 02:19 PM	#5
Bearcat Would an idiot do that? Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Arizona Casino cash: $-1065069	Here's one I saw last night... If you don't know, as of today, Facebook wil automatically start plunging the Earth into the Sun. To change this option, go to Settings --> Planetary Settings --> Trajectory then UN-CLICK the box that says 'Apocalypse.' Facebook kept this one quiet. Copy and paste onto your status for all to see.
Posts: 59,614

12-17-2009, 02:21 PM	#8
chasedude Supporter Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: St. Joe Casino cash: $9994900	One of my friends posted this about her 3 yo little girl. I couldn't help but laugh so, i took autumn to go to the bathroom this morning. when she was sitting on the toilet she farted really long . . . . her eyebrows popped up and she got this surprised look on her face and she said "momma, did that make my hair move?" i said "did what?" and she said "my fart." i said "no, baby, that was the heat vent kicking on!" ROTFL
Posts: 36,287

12-17-2009, 02:25 PM	#9
Demonpenz Woman should only make babies Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Apartment "G UNIT!" Casino cash: $-393864	a strawberry cow has wondered onto your farm __________________
Posts: 54,957

12-17-2009, 02:17 PM	#2
Saulbadguy When a nightmare becomes real Join Date: Nov 2003 Casino cash: $736966	"WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE MONDAY?" and "THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY!"
Posts: 47,020

12-17-2009, 02:30 PM	#10
Buck Take a Chill Pill Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: South Carolina Casino cash: $6000295	My friend Posted this. We'll call him Friend #1 Friend #1: Chris Henry looks like a black Avatar -Friend #2: ...too soon? -Friend #3: They are not called Avatars Garrett! They're called Na'vi...JEEZ! -Me: looked -Friend #1: Looked? -Me: No, you said he looks like a black Avatar, I corrected you. He looked like a black Avatar. Friend #1: Oooooooh Matt too soon!! Too soon!!! What's wrong with you!!!!
Posts: 44,606

12-17-2009, 02:37 PM	#12
Dark Horse Veteran Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Kansas Casino cash: $6685015	I just don't understand all this fancy smancy interbook facenet hoohaw, next thing you know all these youngsters will be running around with tellaphones in their pocket.
Posts: 1,473

12-17-2009, 02:39 PM	#13
CoMoChief Mahomes Dynasty Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Parts Unknown Casino cash: $7672254	I saw this one. "Welp looks like ESPN has decided to broadcast Women's College Basketball on TV again, I guess ESPN is telling me to go study for my physics final"
Posts: 39,245