Movies and TV Worst Movies Evar - Page 8

Saccopoo · 09-25-2009, 01:49 AM

The Megan Fox thread got me to thinking...what are your personal "worst" movies you've ever seen?

Here's my top five right off the top of my head:

1. Crank
- And Statham was so good in Snatch. WTF happened to that guy? This movie is a trainwreck of epic proportions. I'm getting physically sick just thinking about this pail of warm spit.

2. Nothing But Trouble
- No words to discribe how bad this piece of shit is as Dan Ackroyd builds up his acting resume with this triumphant followup to his Oscar worthy performance in Caddyshack 2. Everyone associated with this movie should be killed.

3. Clerks 2
- Why does Kevin Smith even make movies? He's like a really bad Quentin Tarrantino, and that's saying a lot (or very little). Blew his wad on the original Clerks and has treated us with calamities such as this ever since.

4. Any Given Sunday
- See #3 for description on Oliver Stone. The fact that he is actually putting out Wallstreet 2: Money Never Sleeps, put out Alexander and this steaming pile of monkey shit. I mean, when was the last time anyone played NFL football in the dark? Probably the last time Al Pacino didn't mail it in on a movie. HOOOHAAA! Al. Hoohaa indeed.

5. Righteous Kill
- Pacino. DeNiro. It's got to be great, right? OMG. They didn't even put a stamp on the letter to mail it in for this lump of festering goat bile. And next time, remember to get a stand in double for anytime you are being filmed trying to throw a ball or run Bobby. I mean, shit. Who would of thought that DeNiro throws like a girl. An old, wrinkled up sissy armed girl who runs like a hobbled 89 year old lady in six inch stilettos.

SDChiefs · 09-25-2009, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

Please. The acerbic, sarcastic, know-it-all commentary on everything in life was all used up at the end of Clerks. The well was literally dry. And to have two disgruntled angels pull the same schtick as Dante and Randall was weak. Especially two disgruntled angels played by none other than Ben Affleck (Gigli, Pearl Harbor, Armageddon, Daredevil, etc. I mean ****. Ben Affleck could have his own wing in the Worst Movies of All Time's Hall of Fame.) and nancyboy, pudding headed Matt Damon. Let alone casting Screechy Rock, Mumbles Rickman, and the ultimate Hollywood hermaphrodite Linda Fionentino. Jay with a machine gun and Alanis Morrisette as God doing handstands? Are you ****ing kidding me? It's witless, stupid, played out garbage. You want commentary on the Catholic Church from a good movie? Go watch Beckett, Brook's History of the World or MP's Meaning of Life. This and every other Kevin Smith movie other than Clerks is garbage. Pure, unadulterated garbage. See Clerks 2 for proof. Also Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Holy shit, that is bad. And Mall Rats. Basically the same thing as Clerks with Jason Lee in the Randall role. The same tired crap all over again, but in color with those super special moments of Kevin Smith flying through the air. And it had Ben Affleck in it. Again. **** Kevin Smith and **** his ultra-shitty played out same schtick movies.

You.... Are...... Gay. And Linda Fionrentino is smoking.

Saccopoo · 09-25-2009, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SDChiefs

You.... Are...... Gay. And Linda Fionrentino is smoking.

I'm not the one whose ghey if you think Linda is hot. Maybe hot if you like Ladyboys...She's got a deeper, gravelly voice than Johnny Lee Hooker.

**rockymtnchief** · 09-25-2009, 10:52 AM

Zoolander was so bad that I only watched the first 20 minutes.

SDChiefs · 09-25-2009, 10:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

Are you actually going on the record saying Nothing But Trouble is a good movie.

Harrrrable, just makes you sad to see people you like involved with such an ill-conceived mess. You'd like to think there would be someone in the process who saw the 'naked emperor' they were constructing.

No. I thought it was garbage. But the other four range of entertaining to freaking great movies.

SDChiefs · 09-25-2009, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

So, you like Crank? With Jason Statham running around in a hospital gown with his anus hanging out? That really believable pseudo-rape scene with Amy Smart? Vote for Pedro as a ghey clubbing snitch? The line "Who wants white meat?" The whole concept of "bad Chinese shit" pumped into his veins by a sterioded Ricky Ricardo? And that Dwight Yokam as a back room, lost his license MD to the hooker and drug dealers of LA, who knows all about this "bad Chinese shit" and tells him to go drink some Red Bull and it will be all better. Plus the fact that he fell 17,000 feet from a helicopter, lived, and then had some chinese guys steal his heart? (Premise for Crank 2.) It was bad on every single level. It made Uwe Boll proud of his work.

What are you? 13 and mentally reeruned?

No, I choose not to live in SLC.

CoMoChief · 09-25-2009, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rockymtnchief

Zoolander was so bad that I only watched the first 20 minutes.

It took me 2 times to watch that movie. The 2nd time though I thought it was funny.

Also went and saw Super Troopers in the theatres and was incredibly disappointed. Then saw it a year later on DVD and laughed my ass off.

CoMoChief · 09-25-2009, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sofa King

no makeup...

That's one Fugly bitch, man.

SDChiefs · 09-25-2009, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

I'm not the one whose ghey if you think Linda is hot. Maybe hot if you like Ladyboys...She's got a deeper, gravelly voice than Johnny Lee Hooker.

You would be the ultimate wingman. I bet your famous quote at the bar is "Ill take the fat, ugly one." We should hang out sometime.

SDChiefs · 09-25-2009, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoMoChief

It took me 2 times to watch that movie. The 2nd time though I thought it was funny.

Also went and saw Super Troopers in the theatres and was incredibly disappointed. Then saw it a year later on DVD and laughed my ass off.

Same thing with me. Same with Beerfest. The more I watch them the funnier they are to me.

CoMoChief · 09-25-2009, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shakesthecat

I submit Cloverfield for your consideration

OMG this!!!!! I totally forgot this shit fest.

This has to be in my top 5. My roomate loved this.

One thing they NEVER explain. WTF did that monster come from? And the movie was about some douchebag trying to save his whore g/f

**Predarat** · 09-25-2009, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigChiefDave

Tell me how she is fat and ugly?

Slightly thick butterfaced whore???
Is that better?

Sofa King · 09-25-2009, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CoMoChief

That's one Fugly bitch, man.

^ i agree!

KCUnited · 09-25-2009, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Predarat

Skinny Butterfaced whore???
Is that better?

I've turned the lights out on ugly more than a few times, but fat?

The Last Resort
Flight of the Phoenix

RINGLEADER · 09-25-2009, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kysirsoze

Good call on The Happening. I liked his first three and absolutely hated The Village. I "nothing"ed Lady in the Water, but going into The Happening my expectations could not have been lower. I was still shocked at how bad it was. It's like he's trying to suck.

OMG, quick! Run away from the wind!

RINGLEADER · 09-25-2009, 11:08 AM

My contribution is Cool World.

09-25-2009, 01:49 AM
Saccopoo Kindness in words... Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Zion Casino cash: $10025483	Worst Movies Evar The Megan Fox thread got me to thinking...what are your personal "worst" movies you've ever seen? Here's my top five right off the top of my head: 1. Crank - And Statham was so good in Snatch. WTF happened to that guy? This movie is a trainwreck of epic proportions. I'm getting physically sick just thinking about this pail of warm spit. 2. Nothing But Trouble - No words to discribe how bad this piece of shit is as Dan Ackroyd builds up his acting resume with this triumphant followup to his Oscar worthy performance in Caddyshack 2. Everyone associated with this movie should be killed. 3. Clerks 2 - Why does Kevin Smith even make movies? He's like a really bad Quentin Tarrantino, and that's saying a lot (or very little). Blew his wad on the original Clerks and has treated us with calamities such as this ever since. 4. Any Given Sunday - See #3 for description on Oliver Stone. The fact that he is actually putting out Wallstreet 2: Money Never Sleeps, put out Alexander and this steaming pile of monkey shit. I mean, when was the last time anyone played NFL football in the dark? Probably the last time Al Pacino didn't mail it in on a movie. HOOOHAAA! Al. Hoohaa indeed. 5. Righteous Kill - Pacino. DeNiro. It's got to be great, right? OMG. They didn't even put a stamp on the letter to mail it in for this lump of festering goat bile. And next time, remember to get a stand in double for anytime you are being filmed trying to throw a ball or run Bobby. I mean, shit. Who would of thought that DeNiro throws like a girl. An old, wrinkled up sissy armed girl who runs like a hobbled 89 year old lady in six inch stilettos.
Posts: 15,450

09-25-2009, 10:52 AM	#108
rockymtnchief Supporter Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: The Crazys of Montana Casino cash: $10018968 VARSITY	Zoolander was so bad that I only watched the first 20 minutes.
Posts: 5,740

09-25-2009, 11:08 AM	#120
RINGLEADER In Search of a Life Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Confusion, USA Casino cash: $8070503	My contribution is Cool World.
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