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Old 01-13-2010, 11:20 AM  
MTG#10 MTG#10 is offline
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How To Make Love To A Woman
So this girl Ive been seeing for a while now is telling me she loves me and the next time she comes over (tomorrow night) she doesnt want me to **** her, she wants me to "make love to her". I haven't "made love" to someone in so long I don't think I remember how. Obviously it would come naturally if I was in love with her, but Im not so I need to fake this somehow. Any advice/tips would be appreciated.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:26 PM   #181
Mr. Laz Mr. Laz is offline
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Originally Posted by keg in kc View Post
That's her way of telling you she wants to strap-on and **** you up the ass.


i think Kegs is sporting some deep dark secrets.\
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:27 PM   #182
Jilly Jilly is offline
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dude........NOOOOOOOOOO

swope league will never the same. ever again.
what the hell does that have to do with discs?
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:31 PM   #183
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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i think Kegs is sporting some deep dark secrets.\
I surely am.


(but not that one)


Speaking of shaving your butthole, I was once involved with a woman who had a thing for (giving) rim jobs. Once upon a time, she beged me not to shave my butthole.

Which wasn't a hard thing to agree to since I'd never intended to in the first place. I don't know what in the world had made her think I was going to. I always figured she'd want to floss after she was done.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:33 PM   #184
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Only on ChiefsPlanet does the general consensus believe that making love to a woman is not only stretching out her ass and plowing for oil, but cleaning it up afterwards as well. Heh.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:34 PM   #185
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Originally Posted by keg in kc View Post
I surely am.


(but not that one)


Speaking of shaving your butthole, I was once involved with a woman who had a thing for (giving) rim jobs. Once upon a time, she beged me not to shave my butthole.

Which wasn't a hard thing to agree to since I'd never intended to in the first place. I don't know what in the world had made her think I was going to. I always figured she'd want to floss after she was done.
Katipan? Is this true?
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:34 PM   #186
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I'm forwarding a link to this thread to Hallmark. Valentine's day is coming up in a month, and there's some lovely sentiments laid bare here that beg for card design...
I've said for years that I want to develop a line for those moments that Hallmark just can't address.

The "You need to go to the free clinic and get this antibiotic injection" card
the "Hey, did you give me herpes" card

I've got a million of them, complete with poetry like you'd expect.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:35 PM   #187
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what the hell does that have to do with discs?
nate and i sometimes end up in the same group at golf league.

now every time i see him, i'm going to think of his post. for that matter, i believe that i will harass him about it eternally.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:35 PM   #188
Mr. Laz Mr. Laz is offline
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Originally Posted by Bowser View Post
Only on ChiefsPlanet does the general consensus believe that making love to a woman is not only stretching out her ass and plowing for oil, but cleaning it up afterwards as well. Heh.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:36 PM   #189
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Katipan? Is this true?
No and yes.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:36 PM   #190
Jilly Jilly is offline
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nate and i sometimes end up in the same group at golf league.

now every time i see him, i'm going to think of his post. for that matter, i believe that i will harass him about it eternally.
gross, you think of other dude's assholes? I knew you were different.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:37 PM   #191
Jilly Jilly is offline
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Only on ChiefsPlanet does the general consensus believe that making love to a woman is not only stretching out her ass and plowing for oil, but cleaning it up afterwards as well. Heh.
Let's be honest...how many of us really take that extra step? And isn't it that extra step that really says I Love You?
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:37 PM   #192
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No and yes.
LOL. I was asking her, not you. Let the girl speak.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:38 PM   #193
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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A card for the occasion

Baby, you said you'd like to make love tonight
You want my gentle soft delight
So I'll leave home the donkey punch and cleveland steamer
Tonight I won't be the brown star reaper.
I learned on the planet what you need
No Pantera, Kenny G.
The poll told me to do exactly what?!!
That is why I'm peeing, in your butt
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:39 PM   #194
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I've said for years that I want to develop a line for those moments that Hallmark just can't address.

The "You need to go to the free clinic and get this antibiotic injection" card
the "Hey, did you give me herpes" card

I've got a million of them, complete with poetry like you'd expect.
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Originally Posted by Jilly View Post
Let's be honest...how many of us really take that extra step? And isn't it that extra step that really says I Love You?
There truly is an untapped million dollar market out there. Go live the dream, Iowanian.
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Old 01-13-2010, 04:39 PM   #195
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gross, you think of other dude's assholes? I knew you were different.
Not speaking for phish, but if someone volunteered to me that he'd shaved his, that's something I might remember.
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