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Old 08-30-2013, 04:12 PM  
Phobia
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You get blamed for stupid crap too?
I drove my wife's van to the grocery store last night. It's about 2 miles away...

Today I get a nasty text from her about leaving her on empty.

Really?
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:14 PM   #31
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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Originally Posted by Pestilence View Post
What was your escape plan?
I went to Hollywood to pursue my dream, she called and said come home or we're getting divorced.

So i came home and we got divorced anyway.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:18 PM   #32
trndobrd trndobrd is offline
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About 6 months into our marriage my wife accused me of leaving the toilet seat up "all the time". I told her that was absolutely not true, that I never leave the seat up. She insisted that I did. Finally, I told her to follow me to the bathroom where I had her demonstrate how I left the seat up. Because the way it was mounted, the toilet lid would stay up, the the seat would instantly fall back down despite her best efforts to make it stay up.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:18 PM   #33
FlaChief58 FlaChief58 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scott free View Post
I went to Hollywood to pursue my dream, she called and said come home or we're getting divorced.

So i came home and we got divorced anyway.
Yeah, I hear chicks don't like it when their man stars in gay porn. Whodathunkit
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:18 PM   #34
MTG#10 MTG#10 is offline
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This is just the beginning. She's ****ing a 20 year old, count on it.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:20 PM   #35
Chief Roundup Chief Roundup is offline
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Originally Posted by Bowser View Post
Why does she need the van? Does she need to drive herself to the kitchen?
Every kitchen in town.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:22 PM   #36
Phobia
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MTG#10 View Post
This is just the beginning. She's ****ing a 20 year old, count on it.
I don't think she could take that after last night. Plus she knows she would be dead and they would never find anything. I'm not doing that twice in my lifetime.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:24 PM   #37
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Originally Posted by Flachief58 View Post
Yeah, I hear chicks don't like it when their man stars in gay porn. Whodathunkit
true story, not long after arriving there, me and my bud go down to a trendy coffee shop on the Strip one saturday morning to wake up and take in the scene.

As soon as we walk in we notice a group of 7-8 guys, every single one had perfectly coiffed dark hair, ultra tan and were buff as hell, they could all have easily been fashion models, handsome dudes, but they were OBVIOUSLY gay, leaning all over each other, arms around each other... staring absolute holes in both of us.

I was tripping, it was like "here are these guys who could have almost any woman in town, and they're staring at me and my bro"

They looked like a gay gang.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:24 PM   #38
Rain Man Rain Man is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scott free View Post
I went to Hollywood to pursue my dream, she called and said come home or we're getting divorced.

So i came home and we got divorced anyway.

I too had a Hollywood dream, but alas, there could be only one Bobby Brady.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:33 PM   #39
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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I too had a Hollywood dream, but alas, there could be only one Bobby Brady.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:36 PM   #40
Simply Red Simply Red is offline
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Originally Posted by PRIEST View Post
Sounds like more then a empty tank going on . You leave the toilet seat up ?
you ALWAYS are to put the seat back up after going #2

****ing sellout
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:45 PM   #41
keg in kc keg in kc is offline
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Originally Posted by scott free View Post
Love and Marriage Love and Marriage, Go Together Like a Horse and Carriage...

I did my 13 years in the pen, its gonna be a reeeal special one that gets me back in.
13 months was enough for me.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:46 PM   #42
TimBone TimBone is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scott free View Post
true story, not long after arriving there, me and my bud go down to a trendy coffee shop on the Strip one saturday morning to wake up and take in the scene.

As soon as we walk in we notice a group of 7-8 guys, every single one had perfectly coiffed dark hair, ultra tan and were buff as hell, they could all have easily been fashion models, handsome dudes, but they were OBVIOUSLY gay, leaning all over each other, arms around each other... staring absolute holes in both of us.

I was tripping, it was like "here are these guys who could have almost any woman in town, and they're staring at me and my bro"

They looked like a gay gang.
I bet that's only half of the story.
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:49 PM   #43
FlaChief58 FlaChief58 is offline
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Originally Posted by McFly View Post
I bet that's only half of the story.
His ex knows
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:53 PM   #44
Deberg_1990 Deberg_1990 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phobia View Post
I drove my wife's van to the grocery store last night. It's about 2 miles away...

Today I get a nasty text from her about leaving her on empty.

Really?
No wash and wax either? Your an awful husband
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Old 08-30-2013, 05:54 PM   #45
Demonpenz Demonpenz is offline
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turn it into a rape van
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