Ever Sell an Engagement Ring?

[Pointer19]

You could spend weeks reading on the corruption of the diamond industry, but the bottom line is that diamond rings lose tons of value after they walk out the jewelry store. Pawn shops and "We Buy Gold and Gems" places won't pay more than the melt value for the metal and pennies on the dollar for the diamonds.

My girlfriend has two rings from a dirtbag ex that she's asked me to get rid of for her. One originally sold for $8500 and one for $1000. Any idea how I can get the most for these two rings?

Pictures below in case you're interested:
https://imgur.com/a/Jvdj0wN
https://imgur.com/a/zZV7puo

[Bearcat]

Originally Posted by Katipan

Yeah making people jealous is super high on my list of priorities now, I can only imagine that will gain as I get older and closer to dead.

Not to mention I expect you to just give off the aura that you would kill for me. The ring is unnecessary unless it unlocks your gun.

You're always safe with me.

I'm a very good screamer.

[Pointer19]

Originally Posted by Otter

No warning signs here....

The douche was abusive - poor girl.

Originally Posted by DaFace

What I'm learning in this thread is that I lucked out by marrying someone who grew up poor and thinks that expensive jewelry is a waste of money.

Said girl wants moissanite one day, one of the much more affordable diamond substitutes.

[Hoover]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

I was 22 when I bought mine; still in college. Knocked off some HS savings and my motorcycle money account to pay for it. Platinum setting with some baguette cut diamonds on the band and a 1.15 carat round in the center. It's a damn nice diamond; SI but with an inclusion I could hide under the prong - Ideal cut w/ F color. I really did some pretty damn nice work getting that whole thing bought/built for about $4k. And for about 10 years she had the 'best' ring of anyone she knew.

Now people are sporting 2+ carat rings and she kinda hints here and there. Jesus woman - what the hell do you need that kind of rock for?

EDIT: Holy shit!! That rock she wants is gonna cost about $20K! Pft - GFTO here with that. They say you can't put a price on good pussy but man I'm willing to say it ain't worth THAT.

Thankfully my wife hasn't hinted about an upgrade.

I did tell her when I proposed I'm only buying one ring and this is it.

[Rain Man]

It's fine to me if women want a ring as a marital sign, but I'm not sure that rings are optimal for men. I think women should buy men a wedding hat instead of a ring.

[Marcellus]

Originally Posted by DaFace

I don't deny that they charge that much. I just don't know why anyone would pay that much. I spent about $1500 on my wife's ring, and she keeps it in a drawer in favor of a $150 band we got that mirrors it because she thinks the real one is too fancy for daily use.

It's ridiculous how much society has bought into the diamond industry's hype. They're goddamn sparkly rocks.

Not sure how true but I seem to have read somewhere that Diamonds are in no way rare, they keep finding them and keep mining them yet the value doesn't diminish on new ones. They are so common that there is far less cubic zirconium around than diamond and they can make that at will.

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by Katipan

Yeah making people jealous is super high on my list of priorities now, I can only imagine that will gain as I get older and closer to dead.

Not to mention I expect you to just give off the aura that you would kill for me. The ring is unnecessary unless it unlocks your gun.

I'll say this, and it's advice I'll at least give to my son and probably my daughters as well.

If something is important, act like it.

I've only known a few people who have gotten divorced in my circle of friends/family (I mean, excluding my parents and then my dad again), but to a person they did some chintzy wedding or got married at the courthouse.

If your marriage is disposable, sure - treat the wedding like it is. But if it's serious, treat it like it's serious. This goes for any event. I won't go to church without at least a jacket and damn sure won't do weddings or funerals without a suit, even if I'm not in them.

Now I do agree that things have gotten excessive in a lot of ways. But it was important to me that I make a sacrifice to get that ring. I ended up having to wait another 6-7 years to get a motorcycle because the money I'd have spent on it, I spent on her ring instead. I could've spent a couple hundred bucks and still been married, but again - if it's important, act like it.

I also understand people that think that's a load of shit. But I'm betting more of them end up divorced than people that look at it like I do. Put some skin in the game or how serious about this are you, really? And if you're not serious enough to make a sacrifice, you probably shouldn't be getting married.

[Katipan]

I think you should spend your hard earned money on whatever you want.

If it’s not hard earned then maybe consider charity every now and then.

[BryanBusby]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

I had to look it up.

I spent about 4 on the wife's. Since I was in the books, I looked up my wage, and it was about 2 months wages. Good lord I was a dork.

I'm in your camp, but the wife loves it and still wears it every day. Probably it means more to her than me. She's catholic and had our rings blessed, and that matters to her. My ring doesn't fit anymore (it was like a $200 tungsten ring), and there is less than no chance I'd wear it in my profession, but she told me years ago that if I get a new one the right size I need to get it blessed. So all this stuff means different stuff to her than me.

I think I need to go get a groove ring or whatever other silicone ring to not be a ****ing heathen and I actually do love my wife.

Cock ring and have her personally bless it

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

I'll say this, and it's advice I'll at least give to my son and probably my daughters as well.

If something is important, act like it.

I've only known a few people who have gotten divorced in my circle of friends/family (I mean, excluding my parents and then my dad again), but to a person they did some chintzy wedding or got married at the courthouse.

If your marriage is disposable, sure - treat the wedding like it is. But if it's serious, treat it like it's serious. This goes for any event. I won't go to church without at least a jacket and damn sure won't do weddings or funerals without a suit, even if I'm not in them.

Now I do agree that things have gotten excessive in a lot of ways. But it was important to me that I make a sacrifice to get that ring. I ended up having to wait another 6-7 years to get a motorcycle because the money I'd have spent on it, I spent on her ring instead. I could've spent a couple hundred bucks and still been married, but again - if it's important, act like it.

I also understand people that think that's a load of shit. But I'm betting more of them end up divorced than people that look at it like I do. Put some skin in the game or how serious about this are you, really? And if you're not serious enough to make a sacrifice, you probably shouldn't be getting married.

I hold the same position. The way I phrase it is "pay it the respect it deserves."

The logical side of me says it doesn't ****ing matter. But the practical side of my life pretty much exclusively shows that if you do little shit (like dressing up for important shit) it does something to the psychology of yourself.

That being said, there is nuance and exceptions. Some people it doesn't change things psychology. RE: Divorce, some people can take it seriously and shit goes off the rails. People change, people weren't grown up enough to understand real life, shit happens. But I'd agree. Taking it seriously and doing "right" improves the probability of success.

[splatbass]

Originally Posted by eDave

The stones can be repurposed into another piece of jewelry with an all new meaning.

My ex-fiance had the diamonds put on a different ring.

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

I hold the same position. The way I phrase it is "pay it the respect it deserves."

The logical side of me says it doesn't ****ing matter. But the practical side of my life pretty much exclusively shows that if you do little shit (like dressing up for important shit) it does something to the psychology of yourself.

That being said, there is nuance and exceptions. Some people it doesn't change things psychology. RE: Divorce, some people can take it seriously and shit goes off the rails. People change, people weren't grown up enough to understand real life, shit happens. But I'd agree. Taking it seriously and doing "right" improves the probability of success.

It's not the 'doing it right' that improves the probability, it's the willingness to do so. If your parents give you $10K to go buy a ring but your wife never knows, that doesn't mean anything - you've not demonstrated a fundamental commitment - it's no skin off your ass to spend daddy's money.

But those that ARE willing to do so and make sacrifices to get it done, are those that have put the requisite amount of thought and care in the decision in the first place.

The nicer ring and more substantial wedding is simply a byproduct of that level of commitment and dedication to the union. If it matters, you'll treat it as such. And you likely won't give it a second thought.

But as you and I appear to be the same person in a dozen different ways, I suspect you already understood all of that...

[Bearcat]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

I'll say this, and it's advice I'll at least give to my son and probably my daughters as well.

If something is important, act like it.

I've only known a few people who have gotten divorced in my circle of friends/family (I mean, excluding my parents and then my dad again), but to a person they did some chintzy wedding or got married at the courthouse.

If your marriage is disposable, sure - treat the wedding like it is. But if it's serious, treat it like it's serious. This goes for any event. I won't go to church without at least a jacket and damn sure won't do weddings or funerals without a suit, even if I'm not in them.

Now I do agree that things have gotten excessive in a lot of ways. But it was important to me that I make a sacrifice to get that ring. I ended up having to wait another 6-7 years to get a motorcycle because the money I'd have spent on it, I spent on her ring instead. I could've spent a couple hundred bucks and still been married, but again - if it's important, act like it.

I also understand people that think that's a load of shit. But I'm betting more of them end up divorced than people that look at it like I do. Put some skin in the game or how serious about this are you, really? And if you're not serious enough to make a sacrifice, you probably shouldn't be getting married.

I've been rolling this around in my head a bit and IMO this doesn't accurately depict the skin in the game.

If you have Elvis marry you in Vegas drive through chapel the night you meet someone, you obviously don't have any skin in the game and chances are probably higher that it'll end poorly.

OTOH, if you date someone for a year or two, give up your personal space to live together, spend money on dates and gifts and so forth... and the get engaged, that's quite a bit of skin in the game already, no? Does paying 3 month's salary on top of that really change anything?

Or to turn that around.... if you met someone at a bar tonight, bought a $10k ring for her and got engaged.... you wouldn't expect throwing $10k into a 6 hour relationship is going to help anything, right? And if it did, probably not for good reasons.

I think there is sometimes a psychological component to it, like Buehler mentioned... dress for success or for the occasion. Granted, my wardrobe was pretty casual before working from home all the time, so can't exactly say I abide by it.

[DaFace]

Originally Posted by Bearcat

I've been role this around in my head a bit and IMO this doesn't accurately depict the skin in the game.

If you have Elvis marry you in Vegas drive through chapel the night you meet someone, you obviously don't have any skin in the game and chances are probably higher that it'll end poorly.

OTOH, if you date someone for a year or two, give up your personal space to live together, spend money on dates and gifts and so forth... and the get engaged, that's quite a bit of skin in the game already, no? Does paying 3 month's salary on top of that really change anything?

Or to turn that around.... if you met someone at a bar tonight, bought a $10k ring for her and got engaged.... you wouldn't expect throwing $10k into a 6 hour relationship is going to help anything, right? And if it did, probably not for good reasons.

I think there is sometimes a psychological component to it, like Buehler mentioned... dress for success or for the occasion. Granted, my wardrobe was pretty casual before working from home all the time, so can't exactly say I abide by it.

I also think that it depends on what your relationship is really like in the first place. My wife and I had lived together for two years before we got engaged, and we shared a lot of our expenses. If I'd spent $10k on a wedding ring, her response wouldn't have been "OMG how thoughtful." It would have been "Why the **** are we living in this shithole if you can afford $10k on a ring?"

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

It's not the 'doing it right' that improves the probability, it's the willingness to do so. If your parents give you $10K to go buy a ring but your wife never knows, that doesn't mean anything - you've not demonstrated a fundamental commitment - it's no skin off your ass to spend daddy's money.

But those that ARE willing to do so and make sacrifices to get it done, are those that have put the requisite amount of thought and care in the decision in the first place.

The nicer ring and more substantial wedding is simply a byproduct of that level of commitment and dedication to the union. If it matters, you'll treat it as such. And you likely won't give it a second thought.

But as you and I appear to be the same person in a dozen different ways, I suspect you already understood all of that...

Agreed. I like the term sacrifice you threw out there because it seems super counterintuitive to put a ton of focus on material things to represent love. But sacrifice is a good term for it. We value money and give up something we value for the one we love. Much better approach than focusing on shiny shit instead of what's important in the relationship - like how it seems in my head.

So thanks for closing that divide in my (our?) head.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by DaFace

I also think that it depends on what your relationship is really like in the first place. My wife and I had lived together for two years before we got engaged, and we shared a lot of our expenses. If I'd spent $10k on a wedding ring, her response wouldn't have been "OMG how thoughtful." It would have been "Why the **** are we living in this shithole if you can afford $10k on a ring?"

I got a mighty chuckle imagining your wife saying that.